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View Full Version : Does this mean there is no chance?


KimsterKimi
Jul 24, 2012, 11:30 PM
So me and my friend have been hanging out quite a bit. I've known her for a while now, and I told her how I felt about her and she didn't reply to me for 2 days until I initiated contact. We spoke on Saturday and fast forward to yesterday and she initiated contact with me and we spoke and then I asked her if everything was OK she said yes why? So I told her it just feels like I did something that I wasn't aware of. She replied to me that she understands my intentions are and goes on by say that she got uncomfortable when I told her how I felt and she said it makes her think I can't handle being friends so she told me to just slow it down and just stay friends. I have a feeling you guys will tell me something I don't want to hear but I don't even know what I should do. She's a friend and I asked 2 people and they told me just be friends with her. While the other says to walk away. What should I do?

chrisbo147
Jul 25, 2012, 03:27 AM
I would stay friends with her don't break it off just because she didn't want to be more than friends... just let her bide her time just don't mention it no more that you want to be more than just friends she's knows your interested and she will let you know somehow when she's ready

KimsterKimi
Jul 25, 2012, 12:23 PM
I would stay friends with her dont break it off just because she didnt want to be more than friends...just let her bide her time just dont mention it no more that you want to be more than just friends shes knows your interested and she will let you know somehow when shes ready


So right now she's not ready yet?

Homegirl 50
Jul 25, 2012, 12:46 PM
If you honestly think you can be just friends, do it. If you can't, walk away. From what I'm reading, I don't think you are going to be happy with "just friends"

KimsterKimi
Jul 25, 2012, 01:13 PM
If you honestly think you can be just friends, do it. If you can't, walk away. From what I'm reading, I don't think you are going to be happy with "just friends"

Being friends with her is better than nothing and I care about her

talaniman
Jul 25, 2012, 03:32 PM
Settling for friendship when you want romance is a torture. Back away from the romance idea with her and seek it elsewhere or you will begin to think you have a chance for romance in the future and waste a lot of time and emotions on this false hope.

Easier to be friends when you have a balanced life, and more options and opportunities for fun, dating, and romance with people with more potential.

Friends doesn't mean spending all your time and energy on just her.

Homegirl 50
Jul 25, 2012, 07:43 PM
being friends with her is better than nothing and i care about her

You are sounding desperate and that is not attractive.
You are setting yourself up for misery. Take a deep breath and walk away. You will survive.

KimsterKimi
Jul 25, 2012, 08:08 PM
You are sounding desperate and that is not attractive.
You are setting yourself up for misery. Take a deep breath and walk away. You will survive.

I could work with being friends, its not a big deal.. besides I got to respect what she wants

Homegirl 50
Jul 25, 2012, 08:12 PM
If you can do that, cool!

KimsterKimi
Jul 26, 2012, 11:52 PM
Settling for friendship when you want romance is a torture. Back away from the romance idea with her and seek it elsewhere or you will begin to think you have a chance for romance in the future and waste a lot of time and emotions on this false hope.

Easier to be friends when you have a balanced life, and more options and opportunities for fun, dating, and romance with people with more potential.

Friends doesn't mean spending all your time and energy on just her.

You know, I've learned to appriciate being friends with her and it's really cool, oddly the next day after she told me what she felt she asked me if I wanted to have dinner with her and then the next we hung out had lunch and spent the day together is weird but it's nice

KimsterKimi
Aug 1, 2012, 03:55 PM
So me and my friend have been hanging out quite a bit. I've known her for a while now, and I told her how I felt about her and she didn't reply back to me for 2 days until I initiated contact. We spoke on Saturday and fast forward to yesterday and she initiated contact with me and we spoke and then I asked her if everything was ok she said yes why? So I told her it just feels like I did something that I wasn't aware of. She replied back to me that she understands my intentions are and goes on by say that she got uncomfortable when I told her how I felt and she said it makes her think I can't handle being friends so she told me to just slow it down and just stay friends. I have a feeling you guys will tell me something I don't want to hear but I don't even know what I should do. She's a friend and I asked 2 people and they told me just be friends with her. While the other says to walk away. What should I do?

After she told me it made her uncomfortable and wanted me to slow down and be friends, the next night she asked me if I wanted to join her for dinner and then the next day we spent the day togther we had lunch and we hung out in the mall.. I mean how would I know if she wants to be more or is she just content in where we are or is she still getting to know me and my good and bad traits, it's confusing

here2assist
Aug 1, 2012, 04:16 PM
I think if you stay friends with her you'll get your hopes up for something more. I'm here to tell you that I've had guy friends interested in me and the feeling was not mutual. It's highly likely that she won't just wake up and have romantic interest in you. Guys seem to think that just because a woman talks to you and wants to spend time with you she's interested. Nope, we're more complex creatures then that. Sorry...

talaniman
Aug 1, 2012, 04:19 PM
Is she your only female friend Mr. I am always available?

KimsterKimi
Aug 1, 2012, 04:27 PM
Is she your only female friend Mr. I am always available?

I have quiet a bit of female friends


I think if you stay friends with her you'll get your hopes up for something more. I'm here to tell you that I've had guy friends interested in me and the feeling was not mutual. It's highly likely that she won't just wake up and have romantic interest in you. Guys seem to think that just because a woman talks to you and wants to spend time with you she's interested. Nope, we're more complex creatures then that. Sorry....

If all she needs is time I'm cool, she actually asked me if she could look at my phone when she saw my background

talaniman
Aug 1, 2012, 04:38 PM
I find it best to have fun and see what happens. That's what dating is about. Having fun getting to know each other. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't, but if you are worried about wasting your time, then your expectations are to high.

Or you are spending too much time on one thing and neglecting your other fans.

here2assist
Aug 1, 2012, 04:41 PM
I don't think she needs time. I think she only sees you as a friend. I've looked at my girlfriend's phones and it doesn't mean I'm going to become gay and interested in them. Not sure why you inserted that detail.

There's so many women out there and I guarantee you'll meet one that piques your interest even more :-)

KimsterKimi
Aug 1, 2012, 04:50 PM
I don't think she needs time. I think she only sees you as a friend. I've looked at my girlfriend's phones and it doesn't mean I'm going to become gay and interested in them. Not sure why you inserted that detail.

There's so many women out there and I guarantee you'll meet one that piques your interest even more :-)

Thanks, really appriciate it

KimsterKimi
Aug 1, 2012, 04:53 PM
I find it best to have fun and see what happens. Thats what dating is about. Having fun getting to know each other. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't, but if you are worried about wasting your time, then your expectations are to high.

Or you are spending to much time on one thing and neglecting your other fans.

I think for now I'll go with the flow, at the same time meet others

lulu 98
Aug 2, 2012, 03:36 AM
I think you should stay friends with her. And if she doesn't feel the same right now or for a while then I guess you've got to move on

KimsterKimi
Aug 3, 2012, 12:59 AM
i think you should stay friends with her. and if she doesn't feel the same right now or for a while then i guess you've gotta move on

Thanks, but um before I told her how I felt, a month ago before she was going on vacation she took a picture of me on her Iphone, is that odd or that's just normal

Homegirl 50
Aug 3, 2012, 09:02 AM
People take pictures of friends all the time. Don't read too much in to this.