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View Full Version : How to become more friendly?


tikki14
Jul 19, 2012, 12:24 AM
I'm a kind of shy person, I usually like to listen more than talk, but when I start talking you can hardly stop me. I have only two good friends and I'm happy I have them, but I would like to become more friendly so that I can make friends easier. I don't mean that I would leave my bestfriends in defiance of 1000 so called friends, but I feel that I'm quite isolated in comparison with others and I'd like to meet new people, make new connections. I just... I don't know how to interract with new people... even if they are the first ones to talk to me, I'm not good at carrying a conversation without looking weird or unsociable. I love being surrounded by people, so I don't consider that I have any problems of this kind, I just like to watch closely that person, see how he / she talks, behaves and only if they are patient enough to take my time to open up myself they become my friends. I wish I could skip these steps and be simply friendly. I'm going to move town so I will definitely meet new people and I wish I made a better impression.

joypulv
Jul 19, 2012, 01:55 AM
"I just like to watch closely that person, see how he / she talks, behaves and only if they are patient enough to take my time to open up myself they become my friends."

"I wish I could skip these steps and be simply friendly."

"I wish I made a better impression."

Those 3 statements suggest to me that you think that being friendly is about how you present yourself, and it isn't. Being friendly with new people especially is about saying hi, how are you (wait for an answer), and a few small nice comments about that person - nice shirt, you have good taste, I liked what you said in class/work/etc. Opening up about yourself comes later, and not in a long speech either, but in just a sentence or 2 here and there. You will know when the friendship is ready for that deep conversation about likes, dislikes, your past, your future, what makes you compatible. That rarely happens right away.