I have a fb page, and I got on the subject of being called "hon" by total strangers. It irks the H.E.L.L out of me, I can NOT stand it, how do you guys feel after being called "hon" or "sweet heart" by a total stranger?

So I'm at a restaurant, the waitress is clearly younger than I, I ask for more napkins for my 4 year old and she replies with "sure thing hon". "That's it," I thought, "The last straw." I asked her if she calls everyon that, even the obviously senior citizens? She replied "yea hon, I do". I was shocked. If I ever called a teacher, parent, aunt or elder "hon" I'd have the poop smacked out of me. It's disrespectful and condescending, that's why. And patronizing. I was eating lunch with a girl friend of mine and the server kept calling us 'hon". I know my eyes would have gotten stuck in the back of my head, had that wives tale actually been true... I asked my friend, how does that make her feel? As one of the most educated people I know in our age bracket, she replied "It's so condescending, I HATE IT". Okay, so I'm not alone in thinking this. I thought maybe it's just insulting as a woman, went to my parents’ house, and asked my father (as a visible senior citizen) what he thought about being called ". Okay, so I'm not alone in thinking this. I thought maybe it's just insulting as a woman, went to my parents’ house, and asked my father (as a visible senior citizen) what he thought about being called "? I should note my father is also a veteran, and obviously retired military, an under water's weapons tech to be exact. He thinks it's ridiculous to be called "? I should note my father is also a veteran, and obviously retired military, an under water's weapons tech to be exact. He thinks it's ridiculous to be called " by a total stranger! I have heard the term used by nurses and other professional titles and while I am sure the user of the term means no disrespect, it comes across as patronizing for some. I would prefer to save the term of endearment for those close to me.

I'm a veteran too, and a male and would rather be called "hon" than a lot of other things people might call me.
It is such a big deal in Baltimore MD that they have a "Hon" contest every year, and all the ladies dress up with their hair in beehives etc.
Not worth getting all that bent out of shape over, in my humble opinion.
Whoops, I almost put a comma and a Hon at the end of the last sentence.

I don't get all bent, it's just something that irks me.

My grandfather would say, "Call me anything you want. Just don't call me late for dinner."

Hm, I guess it's just me who finds it patronizing and rude.

I have a fb page, and I got on the subject of being called "hon" by total strangers. It irks the H.E.L.L outta me, I can NOT stand it, how do you guys feel after being called "hon" or "sweet heart" by a total stranger?

So I'm at a restaurant, the waitress is clearly younger than I, I ask for more napkins for my 4 year old and she replies with "sure thing hon". "That's it," I thought, "The last straw." I asked her if she calls everyon that, even the obviously senior citizens? She replied "yea hon, I do". I was shocked. If I ever called a teacher, parent, aunt or elder "hon" I'd have the poop smacked outta me. It's disrespectful and condescending, that's why. And patronizing. I was eating lunch with a girl friend of mine and the server kept calling us 'hon". I know my eyes would have gotten stuck in the back of my head, had that wives tale actually been true... I asked my friend, how does that make her feel? As one of the most educated people I know in our age bracket, she replied "It's so condescending, I HATE IT". Okay, so I'm not alone in thinking this. I thought maybe it's just insulting as a woman, went to my parents’ house, and asked my father (as a visible senior citizen) what he thought about being called "hon"? I should note my father is also a veteran, and obviously retired military, an under water's weapons tech to be exact. He thinks it's ridiculous to be called "hon" by a total stranger! I have heard the term used by nurses and other professional titles and while I am sure the user of the term means no disrespect, it comes across as patronizing for some. I would prefer to save the term of endearment for those close to me.

Stop using Facebook just making the rich richer

I hate being called "hon" too Bella. You're not alone.

I have used "sweetie" on this site before, but it's always when the poster is obviously a child, and I use it to soften what I'm about to say, which is usually something they're not going to want to hear.

But, do you know what I hate even more than being called "hon" by strangers?


stop using Facebook just making the rich richer

People that post something that has absolutely nothing to do with the thread. ;)

LOL Yup, was thinking the same thing.

Sweetie seems fitting when you use it to soften your blows, I have used it too. But "hon", just something about it makes me roll my eyes so hard it hurts!

I was told by a few people on that page that Baltimore people use the word hon a lot, never thought of it being a "cultural slang". One guy compared it to using the word "eh" for us Canadians, call me "eh" "hoser", tell me to "take off" ANYTHING but hon by a total stranger! :p

Completely agree, but I can see it being a cultural thing. Still, I find it annoying.

At my work there's a lady that comes in at least once a week. While she's at the register she calls me hon at least 20 times, and sweetie another 20 times. Pretty impressive seeing as she usually only has a few items and it doesn't take me long to ring her through. I smile, but inside I die a little more every time she delivers another hon or sweetie. She's also a bit off her rocker, so I guess I have to take that into consideration. :(

Drives me batty. I think that one day I'll just say "No problem you old battle axe". :)

Hahah! Can you tape this for me?

Hahah! Can you tape this for me?

LOL! I'll try, but it will have to wait until September. I have the summer off. I have to get my house cleaned up and ready. I have a very important visitor coming next month. :)

Yes you do, more then the Queen ;) <3

Yes you do, more then the Queen ;) <3

If the Queen were coming I wouldn't be putting in this much effort. ;)

But yes, very important guests. We're giddy about it. Syd can't wait, she already has a list of things to do with Miss E. Your poor child won't have a moments peace. ;)

The people guilty of this are usually service people -- the cashier at the convenience store, the lab tech taking your blood, the checkout clerk at the grocery store, the hospital nurse's aide bringing you a bedpan, the waitress at Denny's, and so on. It used to be regional, with US Southerners doing this, but now, because we are all so mobile, it's less of a regional endearment and can be found all over the US and beyond.

Since people don't know your real name, rather than use a more formal sir or ma'am, they use "hon" to give an air of friendliness and warmth--and maybe, in the end, show basic laziness toward customers who pass like ships in the night. So put your hand on that person's arm, smile, look directly into her eyes (yes, the perp is usually female), and tell her to please call you by your real name,"X" or "Mrs. Y" (or whatever). If you are offended by "hon," then it behooves you to be proactive. The same kind of thing happens at the doctor's office when older patients are called by their first name. I'll accept "hon" any day before I will accept that!

That's good, at least she will be out of my hair! Poor R has to babysit! Lol

That's good, at least she will be outta my hair!! Poor R has to babysit! lol

R, J and S are on E sitting duties while you're here. :)

Can we turn those initials into a word? We only have one vowel! Um...

Jers, nope.
Serj, maybe?
Rejs, defnitiely not.

Maybe we should add our initials, B and A.

Jabers! We need another b.

Ya, I'm bored. :(

I don't mind it when I am called hon now and then. It actually beats being called a douche or worse... though I am used to it.

I don't mind it when I am called hon now and then. It actually beats being called a douche or worse...though I am used to it.

Who would call you a douche? I want names, addresses, numbers. ;)

You're a big ole softie!

Yes being called certainly is better than being called 'douche'... I don't want to come across grumpy or mean, it's just a pet peeve that probably will never go away. IDK, my friend can't stand it when people repetitively press the elevator button over and over again, she isn't going to go postal in her office, just an annoying quirk I guess. Every one's got them, I was just venting about mine :)

Your list will get longer as you age, Bella. My list doesn't fit on one 8x11.5 sheet of paper any longer. And it's in little print. Now I know why old people are often grumpy.

Hehe yea, I have noticed it increases with age! Oh dear at this point I may get my own show!

We were in a drug store one day and the guy in front of us had a dispute about how they were adding up his bill or something, and he was obviously right but he just said ok- do it your way-took his change and was in the process of leaving and I said-you were absolutely right, they did it wrong-talk to the manager.
And he said -I know, but I don't let others get inside my head over minor issues.
(correction-my wife says that what he actually said was: I don't let people rent space in my brain)
I have come to realize that he might be right about that.
I fight a lot of things on principle, and do a lot of legwork and send letters and file complaints and at least try to cause some of the world's jerks some hassle and trouble--but it is very rarely worth the work I put into it.

If you have any problem with being addressed in some form of a pet name then DO NOT visit the southern states of the U.S. Down in that part of the country it's the norm to address people that way and some go to the limit with it.

Don't stress out about it hon. ;P

Don't stress out about it hon. ;P

LOL! She's going to smack you! ;)

I can deal with "hon," sometimes, it really depends on who is using it. What I CAN'T stand is "shuga," southern slang for sugar. There is a nurse that I work with that calls everyone "shuga" with a deep strong southern drawl. I just want to smack her in the mouth every time she says it. Luckily she's moved to day shift so I don't have to hear it as often.

I can deal with "hon," sometimes, it really depends on who is using it. What I CAN'T stand is "shuga," southern slang for sugar. There is a nurse that I work with that calls everyone "shuga" with a deep strong southern drawl. I just wanna smack her in the mouth every time she says it. Luckily she's moved to day shift so I don't have to hear it as often.

I can honestly say that I've never been called "shuga' or anything close to it. I've been called hon, sweetie, dear, love, and things I can't post here, but never shuga. :)

We were at a BBQ restaurant a few years ago. The waitress was trying to be hip and cool. She kept referring to us as "peeps" and my 10 year old daughter was "girlfriend"... Now, I could maybe... maybe understand it if she was 18 or so but she was older than me.

Turned out she was drunk on the job anyway so we didn't have to deal with her after that day.

I can honestly say that I've never been called "shuga' or anything close to it. I've been called hon, sweetie, dear, love, and things I can't post here, but never shuga. :)

Then you haven't met Peggy! ;) The "shuga" thing with the strong southern drawl, that she doesn't have naturally, is so much more annoying than "hon" anytime.

I used to like it when Cats called me "Shuga" or "sweets", and it really only depends on WHO'S calling me hon. I hate it when some snot nosed kid is calling me hon, or I over hear them calling an elderly person hon. Grates my cheddah I tell yah!

Enigma, you better run! You're getting a spanking!

I used to like it when Cats called me "Shuga" or "sweets", and it really only depends on WHO'S calling me hon. I hate it when some snot nosed kid is calling me hon, or I over hear them calling an elderly person hon. Grates my cheddah I tell yah!

Enigma, you better run! You're getting a spanking!

We're spanking Enigma? I'm in! :)

Oops... WT?

But there is no right thread, so blah, I'm in! :)

You guys promise? ;)

You guys promise? ;)

I've seen pictures of you, so you better believe that I promise.

Disclaimer "I'm not gay, or bi, but, it's Enigma! She's gorgeous, and sweet. I can learn to be into girls." :)

I don't care what you call it, I'm spankin her! Hahah

I don't care what ya call it, I'm spankin her! hahah

Me too! Me too! I want a shot at this!

Just got a call asking for Andrew Ledgeman. Not even close! Try again! ;)

I find being called "hon" is not as annoying as the store clerks or waiters who call me by my first name after running my credit card, as in "Have a nice day Ed." (Ed is not my real name - just using it to illustrate the point). We've raised our kids to always address their elders as "Mr." or "Mrs" as a sign of respect - never by first name unless specifically requested to do so. To have some teenager address me that way is really annoying.

I find being called "hon" is not as annoying as the store clerks or waiters who call me by my first name after running my credit card, as in "Have a nice day Ed." (Ed is not my real name - just using it to illustrate the point). We've raised our kids to always address their elders as "Mr." or "Mrs" as a sign of respect - never by first name unless specifically requested to do so. To have some teenager address me that way is really annoying.
Like I think I said earlier, seniors/old people being addressed by first name by medical personnel is also universal and horrendous. I say something every chance I get. In fact, NO patient should be addressed by first name if over the age of 18, until permission is given. We were very careful about this when I worked in Libraryland. Not sure it's the rule, but should be.

I dislike being called 'hon' by anyone. Especially on here, especially on here I find it condescending.

I always thought that this was a southern US thing, I guess not.
I don't mind it so much from people I know and have a connection with or even an elderly stranger, but I'll have to admit it does bug me a little when it is a total stranger my own age or younger.
It happens a lot at work with our older clients, that's fine by me I take it as a sign of comfort and familiarity.

My story? Went to the printer with a letterhead, envelope, invoice, business card order. Picked out everything I wanted, the way I wanted it, checked the proofs - exactly what I had in mind.

And then the owner (not realizing it's MY business) said: "Hon, do you have authority to place this order?"

And told him I would go home and ask myself that question and marched out of there - "Hon"? "Authority?"

He lost a big order and what would have been repeat business.

Yesterday I took my car in to be inspected, wore a tank top, sandals, knee length shorts. I was going to a repair facility! Passed, no problem (should, it's new with few than 10,000 miles) and I asked the Nice Man Behind the Counter where to take the electronic key to get the battery changed because it's losing distance.

He said, "Go to any Chevy dealer. Wear that top and they'll replace it for free." Long silence. I said, "Okay" and left.

What goes through people's heads?

He also just lost any hope of ever seeing me and/or any vehicle I own.

Judy, do these two guys know they lost a big chunk of business and why? (And our economy is bad because.. )

I think both were too stupid to get it - the printer, I'm sure, is still trying to figure out what I said ("She's going to ask herself?") and the car mechanic - who knows.

No doubt the guy at the print shop is still scratching his head.
Why do some men feel that they can be so forward? Do they think they are just that macho or do they just not think about what they say?

Reminds me of when I bought my first new car. I was 22, my dad went with me because he was co-signing the loan. I knew what car I wanted, what I could afford. When I got there we had to wait for a salesman, so we looked around. I was sitting in one of the showroom cars when the salesman came up. He greeted my father, asked what he was looking for. My dad told him that I was the one purchasing a car. So he leaned into the car I was sitting in said "Isn't it a pretty color? Flip down the sun visor, there's a mirror so you can put your makeup on without having to dig through your purse".

I got out of the car, asked him to lift the hood, started asking about the engine, how the gas mileage is, etc. etc. He stood there with a stupid look on his face, turned to my dad and asked him if he had any questions. My dad said "Yes, I do. Do you want to make a sale or not? My daughter is here to buy a car, not me, so she's the one you have to sell on this".

Long story short, I made the guy spend two hours explaining every detail of the car that I had been sitting in. Then I asked to speak to his manager, told the manager which car I wanted (which wasn't the one I had been sitting in), placed the order with the manager, and left. That guy lost a huge commission. Hopefully that taught him a lesson.

Alty - it happens to guys too! I went into a Ford dealership about 10 years ago to see about buying an Escape (which was a brand new model at the time), or maybe an Explorer, wasn't sure which I really wanted, and wanted to see if there were other models I should consider as well. Was greeted by a female salesperson who said she would help me work through what car would be best for me. Her first question was "what color are you looking for?" I was shocked! Color? Are you kidding me? You think that's the most important thing I should consider in deciding what model to buy? I left and went to a different Ford dealer - ended up buying the Explorer.

When I bought my dream car earlier this year my husband went with me but had nothing to do with the trade in and purchase. I'm not too sure he was terribly approving but, anyway - as I was filling out the registration papers I saw a woman come over, talk to my husband, they walked out to the car together. Next thing I knew he was back, laughing. She said that the dealership takes photos of all their customers in their new cars. She apparently thought I was too stupid or dependent to buy my own car.

I'll mention that she walked right past me, with my registration papers in my hand, to get to him.

Or else I bought a macho car.

In early 2003, I researched new cars mightily and then went to a local Dodge dealer to look at and maybe buy myself a new Neon to replace my 1991 Escort GT. After I found a salesman (things were slow) and told him what I wanted to look at, the first sentence out of his mouth was, "Where's your husband?"

Ok WG, that was good! Lol

I have a lawn tractor sitting on the side of my yard under one of those "car port" things, this man came up, knockied on my door and asked to speak to the man of the house. Hmm really? REALLY? I said "I think you have the wrong house". He chuckled and said "you don't have a husband? I want to buy that lawn tractor over there, I'll do you a favor and give you $50 for it and I'll even pick it up". I slammed the door in his face. I can't believe that in this day in age women (yes I understand it happens to men too, but fortunately not as often as it happen to us) are still being treated like second class citizens.

I have a lawn tractor sitting on the side of my yard under one of those "car port" things, this man came up, knockied on my door and asked to speak to the man of the house. Hmm really? REALLY? I said "I think you have the wrong house". He chuckled and said "you don't have a husband? I want to buy that lawn tractor over there, I'll do you a favor and give you $50 for it and I'll even pick it up". I slammed the door in his face. I can't believe that in this day in age women (yes I understand it happens to men too, but fortunately not as often as it happen to us) are still being treated like second class citizens.

Come to Colorado than.. Men will treat you as equals and watch you struggle to pick up heavy items lol

Lol I'll struggle as long as they don't call me hon!

Guess what hon!! I got a new puppy! Chocolate lab rescue! Her name is Dixie Bell!

hm, I guess it's just me who finds it patronizing and rude.

You aren't the only one who finds it patronizing and rude!

Lol J9, get in line, you're the next up for a spanking. I saw the pic, she looks ADORABLE! What's the breed?

Tickle, I am glad I am not the only one, I was starting to feel like a crabby pants. It really is rude!

Well DARLING, you just need to set back and drink some sweet tea and calm on down.

I am getting here late, but yes they do that around here all the time, suppose to be a GA thing. It bothers me, they do it at Waffle House all the time. Call me old fashion, my wife can call me hon or darling, not some strange women.

Hey Honey Buns!

Guess what hon!!! I got a new puppy!! Chocolate lab rescue! Her name is Dixie Bell!

I demand pictures! Yes, DEMAND! ;)

Hey Honey Buns!

Mag, you're a dead man. It's been nice knowing you. ;)

Why would you want to hurt a Big Hot Buttered Love Muffin like me for... Honey Buns?

Mag, I don't know who you are, but if you don't stop, I will end up eating you!

She's a chocolate lab, full blood. Pics are on FB.

Mag, hon, make sure you have some milk with those honey buns!

Strawberry or Peach jam?

And Spam on white with Miracle Whip?

Yuk WG! Please just stick to your cookies and muffins. Lol

Yes

Look at magprob's avatar...

Let me guess... it's a pic of spam on white?

Can't see anyone's avatars from my phone.

It's a can of Spam that spins around. Also, fry up Spam until the edges are brown and crispy. Add fried potatoes, homemade applesauce, peas. Yum!

Ha, it is a can of Spam, my son used to be partial to Treet, Spams less expensive little brother.
I couldn't count the number of Treet meat and cheese omelets that rolled off my stove while he was growing up.

Honey buns... I'm speechless, you get a whipping. Alty, Ineed to borrow Susie for a min.

I used to love me a goold ole spam sammy with HELMANS mayo.

Chuck, I couldn't imagine calling another woman's husband "hon", makes me think of the over weight waitress in the too tight beige and yellow uniform, chewing gum with the pencil in her hair taking orders.

My can of Spam used to spin around but it was costing AMHD too much money for the power bill to keep it spinning so the cheapskates unplugged it. But that's OK, it had too much class for most people anyway, so I packed my spam up and took my show out on the road. I have achieved fame and fortune out here, with my one man travelling chicken show and Spam recipe book. I am on break, so I stop by here to smell the house burning and a cup of coffee. I see J-9 is still uptight as always. You think a doctor she works around would prescribe her something for that?
So, see you later Honey Buns.

Your Spam can is still spinning. Cliff and Ram are gone now, so there must be money available now for extra accessories (like spinning Spam cans).

*note to self, add Spam to grocery list*