Kaneo
Jul 5, 2012, 06:19 AM
All right, I'm new to this site and hopefully looking for some helpful insight.
I'm only young (21), I've been seeing this girl for about 4 months now. I first met her 3 years ago through a friend (she was my friends cousin), since getting to know her I know she's a extremely honest person so I don't doubt what she says, and I know she's loyal. Saying that her ex recently tried contacting her, apparently he was saying how he missed her etc, and he was coming to visit her (live out of state). She told me all of this, at the time I didn't think to ask if she was going to see him, although I did ask her how this made her feel (upset obviously). A few days later after sleeping on it I said I'd like to know what's happening for this to work, e.g. if he's coming to visit and if you're going to see him. I then maybe went a bit far as to saying "If I'm left in the dark I feel as if I might feel strung along. I don't want to be lead on."
Obviously she didn't take too it kindly, it was our first "argument". I understand I probably went too far at the end, allowing a bit of an insecurity to shine. I appologised later the next day, and since then I'm lucky to get a text from her.
She recently started two new jobs, a part time job working 20 hours a week, and a modeling contract (few hours a week). I'll be blunt and basic, she's told me she chose me over her ex, which is why she's upset. The insecurity of me asking brought up red flags. Nervous about the shoot. And here's a big one, recently her father was in hospital under suspicions of Bone Marrow Cancer.
I'm just trying to get a full understanding of the situation, she told me she "likes me like crazy", but apart of her doesn't want to get hurt. So maybe we should take a step back, her photographer said she won't have time for anyone but her. She then said she doesn't want to be in a relationship that gives her more grief. I know she's stuck between getting into the relationship or leaving it.
I started a normal conversation with her tonight (first decent one in 5 days), I ended it with "I'll let you spend time with your family, have a good night tomorrow sounds like you need to unwind. I'm meant to be visitng her on the 22nd of this month, since I live about 12 hours away now, I asked her to let me know what we were and if she still wanted to see me."
I now plan on just leaving it, if she gets back to me I figure cool least that'll bring a means to an end or start something worth while.
I'd just like peoples opinions on how I could have handled it better, and what there thoughts are on how she's feeling.
I'm only young (21), I've been seeing this girl for about 4 months now. I first met her 3 years ago through a friend (she was my friends cousin), since getting to know her I know she's a extremely honest person so I don't doubt what she says, and I know she's loyal. Saying that her ex recently tried contacting her, apparently he was saying how he missed her etc, and he was coming to visit her (live out of state). She told me all of this, at the time I didn't think to ask if she was going to see him, although I did ask her how this made her feel (upset obviously). A few days later after sleeping on it I said I'd like to know what's happening for this to work, e.g. if he's coming to visit and if you're going to see him. I then maybe went a bit far as to saying "If I'm left in the dark I feel as if I might feel strung along. I don't want to be lead on."
Obviously she didn't take too it kindly, it was our first "argument". I understand I probably went too far at the end, allowing a bit of an insecurity to shine. I appologised later the next day, and since then I'm lucky to get a text from her.
She recently started two new jobs, a part time job working 20 hours a week, and a modeling contract (few hours a week). I'll be blunt and basic, she's told me she chose me over her ex, which is why she's upset. The insecurity of me asking brought up red flags. Nervous about the shoot. And here's a big one, recently her father was in hospital under suspicions of Bone Marrow Cancer.
I'm just trying to get a full understanding of the situation, she told me she "likes me like crazy", but apart of her doesn't want to get hurt. So maybe we should take a step back, her photographer said she won't have time for anyone but her. She then said she doesn't want to be in a relationship that gives her more grief. I know she's stuck between getting into the relationship or leaving it.
I started a normal conversation with her tonight (first decent one in 5 days), I ended it with "I'll let you spend time with your family, have a good night tomorrow sounds like you need to unwind. I'm meant to be visitng her on the 22nd of this month, since I live about 12 hours away now, I asked her to let me know what we were and if she still wanted to see me."
I now plan on just leaving it, if she gets back to me I figure cool least that'll bring a means to an end or start something worth while.
I'd just like peoples opinions on how I could have handled it better, and what there thoughts are on how she's feeling.