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jnepic
Jul 4, 2012, 04:23 PM
So, I am 17 years old, and I've been in this relationship with the girl of my dreams for nearly 11 months. We really don't usually fight at all and we always talk and communicate well. However, this summer I went on a trip with my family to Europe. I was there for 17 days and we really didn't get to talk much. We sometimes video chatted and that was fine. Right when I got back, she took a trip to visit her family in Texas. So we didn't get to see each other before she left. Right now, she's still in Texas but here's the problem. She refuses to talk to me. For the first couple of days we talked for like 30seconds and she just said I can't talk but goodnight honey!

I understood that she wanted time to be with her family so I was OK with it. But maybe a couple days in she started acting like she was required to call me each night. I talked to her about it and I said you're not required to call me each night you know. And she said yeah but if I didn't you would get all mad and suspicious. So I was kind of shocked that she was so defensive. I asked her about it and I asked so do you miss me? And she blatantly replied, No. you would think that after more than a month of not seeing, rarely talking she would like to talk to me. So naturally, I was hurt and asked her about it. She replied again with I'm with family.

I tried to understand this and left her alone for a couple days again. However naturally, I'm an impatient person so I called her up one night and I tried to tell her how I've been feeling hurt and kind of left out in the rain. She told me she still loved me and that I was being ridiculous. However, because she called me feeling hurt ridiculous and without reason, I got a little bit angry. We argued some more over how she was treating me and it basically ended with her saying, I'm not talking to you until you get home.

Now, that was 2 nights ago. Since then, I sent her one text message saying I'm sorry which she replied to with, "i'm saying ok....but i still dont want to talk to you." so I said I understood. I also sent her another text message a day later telling her I still love you, I'm here for you whenever you need me. And she chose to ignore it even though I know she saw it. I keep pleading with her to communicate with me so I can understand but she refuses.

So, basically I understand that she needs space. She comes home on Monday and I have no idea what I should do. Should I show up at her house unnanounced with flowers? Should I just not do anything?

On a side note, it is really tough for me to not call her up/text her because naturally I do miss her. And every time I do call/text she gets very angry.
So what do you guys think? I'm hurt, sad, and don't know what to do.

Also she's leaving to go to Florida for another vacation with her family 5 days after she comes back

C0bra_M3nace
Jul 4, 2012, 04:43 PM
Leave her alone!

I can see why she's mad, I really can, you're being helpless and annoying. She shouldn't "miss you" after a couple days, if she does it's unnatural and a bit scary. The fact that a human could be so dependent upon the company of another human being is a bit ridiculous. You need to work on your independence a little bit, if you're seriously this hung up on her.

Calm down a bit, take a deep breath and go do something useful, aside from sitting around wishing you could be with her, or talk to her. Hang out with some friends, go play baseball, soccer or whatever sports you guys are into. Go to the movies, hang out at the mall, go out to a restaurant with a bunch of friends, be social, just stop pestering the girl.

That's great that you love your girlfriend enough to try and show her you care, but have a little bit of self dignity and stop drowning her is sorrow during her trip. When she returns is the time to tell her you missed her. Flowers can't hurt seeing as how you've upset her, if she's into that sort of thing.

Stop being so dependent of her, 11 months isn't a long enough time to know that you're going to spend the rest of your life with her, no matter what you may think. There aren't many happy lifetime relationships that come from your age, not saying there isn't, but it is quite rare.

jnepic
Jul 4, 2012, 04:44 PM
Dude, its been 1 month

C0bra_M3nace
Jul 4, 2012, 04:52 PM
Missed the part where you said you didn't see each other before she left.

Either way, a month really isn't a long time. If you truly love this girl, a month is nothing.

Put yourself in the shoes of the men and woman who serve our countries. They can't see they're loved ones for much longer than a month.

Suck it up and stop being so dependent of this girl.