I have been in a relationship with this guy for almost 3 years now. We have been really good friends since the beginning of high school and we started dating our junior year. I love him in a way I never thought I'd love anything and he says he loves me too but lately things have gotten really bad. He used to treat me like a queen and he still does when he's in a good mood but ever since we went to college he's been depressed and quick to anger, he throws stuff at me when he's mad, and saying I'm just not a good girlfriend and I don't do nearly the amount of things of him as he does for me.

Now, I am a 20 yr old student who supports herself by herself, no help from parents and no student loans. He is a year younger than me and somehow always has money even though he doesn't work (I guess his family gives it to him) and therefore is able to constantly shower me with little presents or take me out to eat. I cannot keep up with him financially and I told him that the other night when we were fighting and he said that's not what he meant by saying I'm not a good girlfriend.

He says I'm not a good girlfriend because whenever he tries to talk about our relationship I start to cry and freak out. This is true, and I do so because at least once every other month he threatens to break up with me and I feel like I've ruined our amazing, fun relationship by being over emotional. I come from a family with a lot of anger so whenever he talks to me angrily I feel like a helpless kid getting yelled at by their parents or watching their parents fight and I just breakdown. I just don't know what to do to get us back to where we were last year.

The other day, he threaten to throw some stupid little toy at me and I lost it an attacked him, pushed him down and started beating him and then he tried to drag me out by my arm and then my hair and wouldn't let go until I bite him. I'm so appalled by both our behaviors and I feel like a piece of s*** now.

Hello, It sounds like he talks about leaving you every other month just to get a reaction from you. Sometimes people change from how they use to be a few years ago because of life changes that takes place. You both should sit down and talk it out. You, have to be strong and not be afraid of the out come after you both talk. He knows already that when you all fight you going into a shell like a child and he plays on that. If some one loves you, they will take care of you and make your feelings important to them too. If you all continue to fight, you you may have to end the relationship because it may get worse and some one may really get hurt. Always do was best for YOU, even if it hurts because at the end of the day all you have is you and your young still.


Good Luck!

You need anger management, you are out of control, and this makes trouble for yourself, and stops any useful, honest communications.

Get some help for yourself.