So I met this girl a year (Spring 2011) ago at my college in a class. I guess we got to know each other better because I offered to tutor her in math. She claimed we were best friends but I didn't really care about the status of our relationship. As the school year came to an end, I was beginning to think I had feelings for this girl however she was dating someone else. I had a really nasty feeling the relationship wasn't going to last long and that one day when she would confess her feelings to me.

Summer, Fall and Winter passed, and I have not talked to her since last spring. I find her one day walking around campus and we decide to hang out again. My feelings for her are still dormant but I decide not to tell her for the sake of our friendship. However, I noticed that she has been having problems with her relationship and begin to worry that something bad is going to happen.

One night, she decides to spend the night at my place. Before we knock out (we slept in separate beds), I can sense that she wants to tell me something. My prediction from a year ago follows through and she confesses her feelings. I confessed mine as well only to learn that the next morning she tells me the relationship won't work out. For the next two to three weeks, we had long talks about where our relationship stands now. We took turns trying to cut each other off but in the end the other person would make an attempt to win the other back.

It seems as if we have made up come her birthday and I decided to spend the entire day with her. The day ended on a good note, however the morning to follow was the kicker. I slept at her place the night before, so the next morning she invited me to her room where we were supposed to watch a TV show before I went back home. Turns out we ended up having sex the entire day. Before we had sex though, she warned me that this would be the only time we were going to do it because she was interested in dating another guy. Turns out she was wrong about that too and we did it again the following weekend. I guess after each time we had sex, we would have long talks about where the relationship was going. She kept telling me she wasn't sure if the other guy had the same feelings for her, but I knew she was going to hook up with him.

We are now in the present and I have just learned that she did hook up with the guy. She confessed to me that she was just using me and ever since then, she has tried apologizing to me but I refuse to accept her apologies.

My thoughts right now... she doesn't care about me, she got what she wanted and now I have been expended. She told me she choose the other guy because she wasn't willing to change for me despite the numerous times I've told her she doesn't need to. I know I would be the world's biggest fool if I went back to her yet at the same time, part of me thinks she will change over time.

Question: Not sure what I should do...

Leave her alone!

Yes! Leave her alone. She already admitted that she was using you. Even before AND after having sex, she told you about this other guy. Don't sell yourself short. Move on. If I had a penny for every time " I " had to move on... well I would have about three pennys. Ok, sorry, bad joke, it's late where I'm at. Really though, you should move on. That was a heartless thing she did to you, and you seem better than that.

I would be hurt to the bone. I NEVER understand people who use other people, and I know it happens all the time.

I don't think you have a choice but to move on. Even if you can come to an understanding or agreement I don't think you can trust her.

And sometimes it's only about the sex.

Yes I am pretty hurt and I thank you all for replying. One of the last things she told me was that she was that she chose the other guy over me because she doesn't want to change and I thought that was pretty ignorant on her part especially during this phase in her life. I actually laughed when she said that but overall, I thought the immaturity pretty much said it all.

@JudyKayTee: I agree, I believe that trust plays a big part in any relationship, dating or not, and after all that drama, there's definitely nothing she can do to redeem herself.

Once again, I really appreciate the responses. It means a lot, thank you all.

Just be kind to yourself right now - you led with your heart and it got trampled on.

It's not your fault. It's her fault.

It has been a calm and thoughtful week. I am slowly beginning to realize she didn't use me... for the most part. I feel like she said she was using me because we've talked numerous times about how the reciprocity our relationship was very poor (I put forth more in our friendship than she did). It wasn't like she asked me to tutor her in math and I gave in, or she just wanted to sleep with me and forget about everything. I offered to tutor her and I wanted to sleep with her just as much as she wanted to sleep with me. Despite the disclaimers, I chose to sleep with her, and as a result costed us our friendship and has left me in the current state that I am in. If anything, she has always considered me her best friend, but I just saw our relationship as a "student-tutor" relationship. Even if she was using me, I feel like she wouldn't apologize.

Just my thoughts this past week...

You sound like you are healing.

You know, everybody gets played at one time or another in some fashion or another -

Glad you're doing OK.

After she confessed to "using me", she said and I quote, "I can't just forget about you though, you're my friend. I actually care about my friends". I initiated both times I slept with her. The only reason why we slept the second time was because I convinced her that we were just going to be friends with benefits. I knew about the other guy after the first time, but went through with it anyway. I feel like I am almost 100% at fault.

After she confessed to "using me", she said and I quote, "I can't just forget about you though, you're my friend. I actually care about my friends". I initiated both times I slept with her. The only reason why we slept the second time was because I convinced her that we were just going to be friends with benefits. I knew about the other guy after the first time, but went through with it anyways. I feel like I am almost 100% at fault.

Ack! You need to get the hell out of this!! You are not at fault, but you deserve a girl who gives you the attention you deserve. Run, don't walk. Cut her off as quick as you are able. When she says she cares about her friends, she doesn't care about them as much as herself. She told you she used you. Just remember, when someone tells you something like that, believe them!!