I dated this girl who cheated on me... she is pregnant now 27 or 28 weeks. Her last lmp was November 28, 2011... last five days. She admitted have sex with the guy November 29,30,1of dec. she had sex with me on December 11. She had an ultrasound done on February 21,2012... saying she was 12weeks pregnant. The doctor told her that she was due September 3,2012... and said her conception date is November 29,2011... she conceived on her period. Should I believe the doctor that the baby isn't mine? If she conceived on her period, isn't she off by a week or so from the ultrasound done on February 21, 2012?

The dates are too close together. The only way to know for sure who the father of this baby is, is a DNA test after the baby is born. There's no other way to determine parentage accurately.

Conception dates are give or take a week or two, never "exact" it is far to close to be for sure, without a DNA test after the child is born.

So conception dates can be off by a week or 2, making it a chance the baby is mine? Have doctors using ultrasound dating conception ever been that far off? I read on other web sites that dating conception using ultrasound at 12 weeks can only be off by a few days at most? True or false?

so conception dates can be off by a week or 2, making it a chance the baby is mine? have doctors using ultrasound dating conception ever been that far off?

Ultrasound is a guess based on the development of the baby, but yes, it can be up to 2 weeks off.

If I had gone by ultrasound my son should have been 11 pounds at birth. He was 8.

If my friend hadn't listened to an ultrasound she wouldn't have painted the baby's room pink after being told that it was 99% positive to be a girl. Her poor son wore pink for the first year of his life.

Ultrasounds aren't exact, they're an approximation. Only a DNA test can determine paternity.

Thanks for your advice... really appreciate. So can ultrasound dating conception at 12weeks be that far off early on? Other web sites says ultrasound only a week or 2 off in the second trimester and later on in pregnancy, not in the first trimester though. http://www.perinatology.com/calculators/Due-Date.htm .sorry I'm a little confuse. Plus she's already engaged to the other guy now base off the ultrasound conception date info saying conception belongs to him on nov.29 encounter.

I know this sucks. You want an answer now. You want someone to say "no chance this baby is yours". Sadly that can't be done. An ultrasound, no matter when it's done, can be off by two weeks either way. The fact that you stated that she conceived while on her period, makes things even more muddy. She can't go by her last menstrual cycle then.

I know you want answers, and you can get them, but not now. You'll have to wait until the baby is born and get a DNA test. I'm sorry, but really, a DNA test is the only answer. Everything else is just a guess.

Thanks... yeah, I guess I have to wait until sept.3

thanks...yeah, i guess i have to wait until sept.3

It's not that long to wait. I know it's hard. But it will fly by. Then you can get the DNA test, and hopefully move on with your life.

Let us know how it goes, and good luck. :)

Well I don't think a DNA test will be needed, its either the baby will be mix or not (white&black)... but yeah not that further to wait. Thanks will do.

well i dont think a dna test will be need, its either the baby will be mix or not...but yeah not that further to wait. thanks will do.

Get the DNA test anyway. It's not always easy to tell by looking at a child, whether it's mixed. In fact, I have known people that had a biracial child, even though both parents were whiter than snow. It happens.

A DNA test isn't that costly considering the peace of mind it will give you.

Good advice... I haven't talk to her in months though,(actually we have no contact at all.) she moved out of state, I don't know if she will or not with the whole DNA test... she believes without a shadow of doubt the baby is his, also I believe so too... just wanted someone else opinion about it. Well only time will tell... thanks.

Not all mixed children look mixed so "looks" never is 100 percent

That's true for mix kids... but this union, the baby will either be all white or mix with curly hair weather very light skin or dark brown skin... DNA test sounds good, but its not my call to make... I think the only way she would get one, if the baby don't have visible traits of the guy she's with.

Did you know that all, or the majority, or back and or mixed babies look white for the first few days of life?

Yes I know that the majority of babies look white until they are a few days old of life... but as I mention, the only way she would doubt the baby belong to the other guy... is if the baby didn't have traits after him... conceiving on your cycle is rare for any woman, and with a 10 to 11 day between sex partners... it just seem like it's a given that the ultrasound dating conception to her second day of cycle is right... at least that's what the doctor assured her... he was confident in his dating. Only time will tell I guess

I know this sucks. You want an answer now. You want someone to say "no chance this baby is yours". Sadly that can't be done. An ultrasound, no matter when it's done, can be off by two weeks either way. The fact that you stated that she conceived while on her period, makes things even more muddy. She can't go by her last menstrual cycle then.

I know you want answers, and you can get them, but not now. You'll have to wait until the baby is born and get a DNA test. I'm sorry, but really, a DNA test is the only answer. Everything else is just a guess.

Sorry for all the questions, but what did you mean by being more muddy because the ultrasound dating conception on the 2nd day of her period? Why can't she go by her last menstrual cycle?

sorry for all the questions, but what did you mean by being more muddy because the ultrasound dating conception on the 2nd day of her period? why can't she go by her last menstrual cycle?

She can't go by her last period because you stated she conceived while on her period.

Most times dates are figured out by the last menstrual cycle. The majority of women are most fertile around 2 weeks after their period. If she conceived while on her period, which you really can't know for sure, then there's a 2 week window, or more, where the dates could be off.

She can't go by her last period because you stated she conceived while on her period.

Most times dates are figured out by the last menstrual cycle. The majority of women are most fertile around 2 weeks after their period. If she conceived while on her period, which you really can't know for sure, then there's a 2 week window, or more, where the dates could be off.

Oh.. okay, so I guess the doctor had to date her pregnancy from conception and not from lmp.

oh..okay, so i guess the doctor had to date her pregnancy from conception and not from lmp.

And that's another issue. There's no way to know when she conceived, unless she's 100% sure of when she ovulated. It's all a guess.

You still seem to be grasping at straws. Really, there's no way you're going to get any answers until the baby is born and a DNA test is done.

You can go round and round with this for the next few months, and you still won't know who the father is until the DNA test comes back.

Yeah I know I won't be 100% sure until a dna test is done, its just that I went 6 to 7 months knowing for sure that the ultrasound dating conception was right, and no chance the baby could be mine... however with this new info, I'm having doubts and a restless mind. Crap! A few more months to go... it will take forever. I mean I want to be prepared just in case the baby is mine, but at the same time I can't because it's a higher chance he/she is not. Well no choice but to wait... thanks again for your advice.

And that's another issue. There's no way to know when she conceived, unless she's 100% sure of when she ovulated. It's all a guess.

You still seem to be grasping at straws. Really, there's no way you're going to get any answers until the baby is born and a DNA test is done.

You can go round and round with this for the next few months, and you still won't know who the father is until the DNA test comes back.

Yeah I know I won't be 100% sure until a dna test is done, its just that I went 6 to 7 months knowing for sure that the ultrasound dating conception was right, and no chance the baby could be mine... however with this new info, I'm having doubts and a restless mind. Crap! A few more months to go... it will take forever. I mean I want to be prepared just in case the baby is mine, but at the same time I can't because it's a higher chance he/she is not. Well no choice but to wait... thanks again for your advice.

Update 8-19

It's not that long to wait. I know it's hard. But it will fly by. Then you can get the DNA test, and hopefully move on with your life.

Let us know how it goes, and good luck. :)

Update, the doctor change her due date from sept.3 to now sept 17. She has been measuring 2 weeks behind since the 2 trimester. Is it normal to change the due date just being 2 weeks off by measurement. Every week now she have an appointment to go too.

update, the doctor change her due date from sept.3 to now sept 17. she has been measuring 2 weeks behind since the 2 trimester. is it normal to change the due date just being 2 weeks off by measurement. every week now she have an appointment to go too.

It's not common to change a date, but it's not unheard of either. It's done to insure fetal/maternal well being. Dates can change due to measurements because these measurements give us an idea of how far along the fetus is in development.

Delivery can actually happen two weeks before or two weeks past the due date. Extending the due date can insure proper fetal lung development.

As noted all along, dates are estimates based on information given, and development of the fetus. So as noted, when the baby is born you do a DNA test,

Hi bradley I'm in the same boat sleep less nights and worring I had sex with my ex November 28 4 months later she calls me saying its mine but she was with another guy her boyfriend the same month till he left in march she is due sep 12 2012 numbers don't add up but my mom has been going with her to all app I'm going to take a dna test because I don't think its mine... bradley can you give me a update on your issue please thank yhou

It's not common to change a date, but it's not unheard of either. It's done to insure fetal/maternal well being. Dates can change due to measurements because these measurements give us an idea of how far along the fetus is in development.

Delivery can actually happen two weeks before or two weeks past the due date. Extending the due date can insure proper fetal lung development.

Thanks for everyone's response, another question... being that she is measuring 2 weeks behind since her 2nd trimester, does that have any impact on the conception date? Meaning did she conceive later than predicted, or measuring behind don't impact the conception date at all?

As noted all along, dates are estimates based on information given, and development of the fetus. So as noted, when the baby is born you do a DNA test,

Thanks, yeah I can't wait to have a dna test done. I'm just eager to learn what are the chances before the dna test. Only 4 more weeks to go.

hi bradley im in the exact same boat sleep less nights and worring i had sex with my ex november 28 4 months later she calls me saying its mine but she was with another guy her bf the same month till he left in march she is due sep 12 2012 numbers dont add up but my mom has been going with her to all app im going to take a dna test because i dont think its mine..... bradley can you give me a update on your issue please thank yhou

Well by my ex first ultrasound, her 40th week was sept.1-3 and 42nd week sept. 17. Somewhere along her 2nd trimester, the doctor change her 40th week to sept. 17 due to 2 weeks behind in measurement.

Do you think its possible to be mine bradley if the last contact was 11/28/11 with edd of 09/12/12?

Do you think its possible to be mine bradley if the last contact was 11/28/11 with edd of 09/12/12?

Are you asking the OP if the baby is yours?

Do you think its possible to be mine bradley if the last contact was 11/28/11 with edd of 09/12/12?

It doesn't matter what badley thinks. What matters is what the DNA test results are.

It doesn't matter what badley thinks. What matters is what the DNA test results are.

Hey I'm no expert... im in the same boat waiting for a dna test.

It doesn't matter what badley thinks. What matters is what the DNA test results are.

I really need to find a way for my body to accept coffee.

I thought the poster was asking if the baby in Badley's post is his, not Badley's.

I thought we had another potential father for Badley's situation.

Another question... being that she is measuring 2 weeks behind since her 2nd trimester, does that have any impact on the conception date? Meaning did she conceive later than predicted, or measuring behind don't impact the conception date at all?

another question...being that she is measuring 2 weeks behind since her 2nd trimester, does that have any impact on the conception date? meaning did she conceive later than predicted, or measuring behind don't impact the conception date at all?

Measuring isn't an exact science. Sadly, nothing in pregnancy is exact. Everything is a best guess. A guess based on science, but a guess nonetheless.

Let me put it this way. When I was pregnant with my son I was sent for an ultrasound the week before my due date. They were worried because I was measuring small. The concern was that I was low on amniotic fluid. So I went for the ultrasound. At that time they determined that the fluid was fine, but they also told me that the baby was already over 9 pounds, with a week to go to my due date.

My son was born 4 days past his due date, and he weighed in at 8 pounds 2 1/2 ounces. A far cry from 9 plus pounds.

The measuring, the ultrasounds, everything, it's a best guess.

I know you're stressing about this, but you really have to do yourself a favor and stop looking at every small thing trying to prove that the baby isn't yours. There really is no way to know other than a DNA test. No one has found another way to determine paternity. Trust me, you won't be the one to find it.

I appreciate your advice, but its just a question... does measuring 2 weeks behind affect predicted conception date? Measurement is from ultrasound and her amniotic fluid is fine. I will still get a dna test... just curious about this question that's all.

i appreciate your advice, but its just a question...does measuring 2 weeks behind affect predicted conception date? measurement is from ultrasound and her amniotic fluid is fine. i will still get a dna test...just curious about this question that's all.

The answer is that it can, and it can't. They judge conception by the last menstrual cycle, supposed ovulation date (that's a guess), ultrasound (another guess based on growth etc), measurement (another guess). Yes, they're educated guesses, but a two week change in conception date is very common. Like I said, it's 2 weeks either way. Only 10% of women deliver on their due date, 45% deliver within 2 weeks before, and 45% deliver within 2 weeks later. It's all a guess. An educated guess, but a guess base don averages. Most people aren't average.

Okay... thanks

hey im no expert...im in the same boat waiting for a dna test.

Hey, I AM an expert.

Update, she just had the baby at 5:15am sept.14,2012... 8pounds 8oz, 21inches. (News flash... she had a GIRL!! From 20 weeks up to 41weeks, she was told she was having a BOY) WOW!! I don't know anymore info being that she lives two states from me... put its pretty likely that I'm not the father... eventhough I was hoping to be. Don't know if she will get a DNA test... or when that would be.

Hey, I AM an expert.

One last question, her deliever date is 9/14/2012... if she conceived on her period 11/29/2011... how many weeks was she? I counted 42weeks 4days?

One last question, her deliever date is 9/14/2012...if she conceived on her period 11/29/2011...how many weeks was she? I counted 42weeks 4days?

You're still trying to guess when she conceived.

She conceived when she ovulated. Unless you know when she ovulated, there's no way to give an accurate gestation period.

Stop guessing and book the DNA test! Geesh! No one can tell you if you're the father without DNA. NO ONE! You can keep asking, but you will never get the answer without a DNA test.

Do you get it? Do you understand? DNA test. That's the only way! The ONLY WAY!

Does not work like that, you can not count weeks, conception is give or take a week or two, babies don't work on an exact time table. Any of you could be the father

Does not work like that, you can not count weeks, conception is give or take a week or two, babies don't work on an exact time table. Any of you could be the father

Also, babies can be born early, or way past their due date. Unless you've only been with one partner for many months before you conceived, there's no way to know who the father is without a DNA test.

Also, babies can be born early, or way past their due date. Unless you've only been with one partner for many months before you conceived, there's no way to know who the father is without a DNA test.

Thanks for the responses... I can't make her take a dna test, but from the pictures I've seen... the baby is the other guy. I'm a light skin black guy, baby's mom white with natural dark brown curly hair... if the baby girl was mine, the baby would have somewhat curly hair. She does not, but she has short/thin straight black/brown hair, blue eyes... white skin. So it's a given... she belongs to the other guy. Thanks for all your help with my situation... im glad this ride is finally over.

thanks for the responses...i can't make her take a dna test, but from the pictures ive seen...the baby is the other guy. i'm a light skin black guy, baby's mom white with natural dark brown curly hair...if the baby girl was mine, the baby would have somewhat curly hair. she does not, but she has short/thin straight black/brown hair, blue eyes...white skin. so its a given...she belongs to the other guy. thanks for all your help with my situation...im glad this ride is finally over.

Don't count on a picture, go for the DNA test.
My grandson is bi-racial, his dad is very dark skinned, his mother is pretty darn white.
Until he was at least a month old you would have never known he was bi-racial, especially from a photo.
Hair texture and color changes also.

Edit: I also have to add that while you think the ride may be over, years down the road whenever she decides she wants it, she may file for a paternity test herself.
At least by doing it now whether you are or are not the father you can handle your business where the child is concerned or you can allow your life and the possibly of the life of a girlfriend or wife and other children to be turned upside down.

I have friends, one black as the night, the other white as the moon, both kids have blonde hair, blue eyes, and pale skin, and he is the father.

You can't go by looks when determining who the father is. Only DNA can tell. I don't know how many times I have to say it before you get it.

thanks for the responses...i can't make her take a dna test, but from the pictures ive seen...the baby is the other guy. i'm a light skin black guy, baby's mom white with natural dark brown curly hair...if the baby girl was mine, the baby would have somewhat curly hair. she does not, but she has short/thin straight black/brown hair, blue eyes...white skin. so its a given...she belongs to the other guy. thanks for all your help with my situation...im glad this ride is finally over.

Most mixed babies have straight thin black/brown hair and all newborn babies have blue eyes.

She refuse to have a DNA test done... what are my option?

You wait until she files for child support. Then she won't have a choice but to submit to a DNA test.

She said she wants to raise the baby on her on, but I want to be apart of the baby life if she's mine. Can't I get a court ordered dna test?

*own

Yes, that would be a question you need to ask under the family law section.

Family Law - Ask Me Help Desk (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/family-law/)

Thanks, but I'll let this one go... she said I was freakin crazy for wanting a dna test, being that the baby is as white as her. I feel stupid for wanting to know now... being that the baby is 7 weeks old, if she was mix... certainly it would have shown up in her complexion by now. Thanks for all the help through this post.

Not necessarily.

thanks, but i'll let this one go...she said i was freakin crazy for wanting a dna test, being that the baby is as white as her. i feel stupid for wanting to know now...being that the baby is 7 weeks old, if she was mix...certainly it would have shown up in her complexion by now. thanks for all the help through this post.

I guess you didn't read my previous post. I have friends one white, the other black as night. They have two children. They're both so white they're almost albino, one has brown straight hair and blue eyes, the other is blonde and blue eyes (the mother is brunette and as I said the father is black) and yes, the children are his, proven with a DNA test.

I guess you didn't read my previous post. I have friends one white, the other black as night. They have two children. They're both so white they're almost albino, one has brown straight hair and blue eyes, the other is blonde and blue eyes (the mother is brunette and as I said the father is black) and yes, the children are his, proven with a DNA test.

If their was a way to send a picture, you'll see what I mean. The babygirl has black hair and brown eyes. She's don't look super white... shes just look like a white baby. Plus some people say the baby favors the other guy.

if their was a way to send a picture, youll see what i mean. the babygirl has black hair and brown eyes. shes dont look super white...shes just look like a white baby. plus some people say the baby favors the other guy.

Again, that doesn't matter. It's DNA that matters, not the color of her skin, the color of her eyes, or the shape of her face. DNA is the only thing that can absolutely determine paternity.

I can send you pictures too. If you look at my friends kids you'd bet money they're not his, but they are.

Again, that doesn't matter. It's DNA that matters, not the color of her skin, the color of her eyes, or the shape of her face. DNA is the only thing that can absolutely determine paternity.

I can send you pictures too. If you look at my friends kids you'd bet money they're not his, but they are.

Yes I understand that, but she refuse to have a dna test because the baby looks 100% white. I change my profile picture... to a picture of the baby, I wish I could post a better picture on here but I don't know how. I know you said you can't go by skin color, but these baby pictures are pretty convincing.

yes i understand that, but she refuse to have a dna test because the baby looks 100% white. i change my profile picture...to a picture of the baby, i wish i could post a better picture on here but i dont know how. i know you said you can't go by skin color, but these baby pictures are pretty convincing.

To you they're convincing, only because you don't listen.

There's a movie that's based on a true story. I don't remember the name of it, but this is what happened. A white couple tried for years to get pregnant. The wife finally conceived and gave birth. The baby wasn't white. In fact, the baby was 100% African American looking.

Well, the husband divorced the wife, convinced that she had cheated. She insisted that she hadn't. They battled in court for many years, he insisting that she cheated, she insisting that she didn't.

Finally, after years, a DNA test was done.

Guess what? The baby was his. Two white parents gave birth to a very black baby. How is that possible? DNA is a tricky, it has to do with everyone in your family tree.

But you don't want to believe that this baby is yours. I do have to ask, why do you continue to ask about this if you're 100% convinced this baby isn't yours?

Actually I believed the baby was mine, I just have my doubts because she told me that the ultrasound dated conception on the 29th of Nov. I wasn't with her until the 11th of Dec. some people say you can't get pregnant 2 days on your period... its rare but possible she said the doctor told her. However, with the baby being born September 14... makes me second guess the conception date accuracy. She refuses to have a dna test done because (she said she know who the father is... its not me because the baby is white she replied. ) before I try to get a court order dna test done... I just don't want to look stupid, and cause more drama for embarking a court order dna test... seeing the features of the baby. To be honest, I pray the baby is mine... that way I don't look so stupid after going through the court for a dna test. Please try to understand my dilemma... thanks for your time.

I do understand your dilemma, but you come here, ask if the baby is yours, we tell you over and over again to get a DNA test, and you make excuse after excuse not to get one.

So the bottom line is this. You either get a DNA test and confirm once and for all whether the baby is yours or not, or you forget about it and move on. Those are your only options. Either way, you've gotten all the advice we can give on this. We're on page 7 of this thread and we're still discussing this, when there really is nothing to discuss. Only a DNA test can determine the paternity of this baby.

OK maybe you didn't read what I wrote clearly... ( SHE REFUSE TO HAVE A DNA TEST DONE) I made no excuse. I just want to make sure there's a chance I could be the father before causing all the drama of me having a court order dna test because SHE REFUSE TO HAVE ONE DONE.

ok maybe you didnt read what i wrote clearly....( SHE REFUSE TO HAVE A DNA TEST DONE) i made no excuse. i just want to make sure theres a chance i could be the father before causing all the drama of me having a court order dna test because SHE REFUSE TO HAVE ONE DONE.

Yes, and you've been told before that you then take her to court. If you choose not to go to court then you're still making a decision about this. It doesn't change the fact that you still have two options, DNA test or forget about this child.

We've all told you that there's a chance that you could be the father. The fact is, no one can tell you what percentage that chance is. We can only tell you that a DNA test is the only way to know for sure.

It's not us that's not understanding you. It's you that's not understanding, or unwilling to listen, to us. We get it. We get that you don't want to go to court. We get that you want to believe that the baby isn't yours because of the color of her skin. Enough excuses. Either go to court and demand a DNA test, or forget about it. Pick one and be done with it.

There's nothing more we can offer on this thread, your question has been answered and then some. You just don't want to take the advice you've been given. That advice won't change if you keep posting to page 8,9 or 10 of this thread. The advice is and has been the same since this thread started.

This is now in your hands. We've given you the facts, and there's really nothing more we can do. So why do you continue to post trying to convince us that the baby isn't yours because she's white, or may have been born early, or late, or any of the other things you've posted? It won't change the only answer that we can give, and that's DNA test.

Yeah I agree... basically you answered what I was trying to ask, is it a high or low chance for me to be this baby father. I know you just said that can't be answered. So I guess I have to open this can of worms that's going to follow with me embarking a court order dna test. I just wanted to avoid all that. Thanks for the help

yeah i agree....basically you answered what i was trying to ask, is it a high or low chance for me to be this baby father. i know you just said that can't be answered. so i guess i have to open this can of worms thats going to follow with me embarking a court order dna test. i just wanted to avoid all that. thanks for the help

I do understand wanting to avoid going to court, I really do. The thing is, if you don't get the DNA test can you move on, always questioning if this baby is yours?

You have a picture of her. You seem to care about this child. Isn't it better to go to court and find out if you're the father, then spend your life wondering? That's really what you have to decide. Is going to court worth it? Is not going to court worth it? Either choice is going to be difficult. Frankly, from what you've written, I don't think you can live your life not knowing if she's your child.

Can you? Only you can determine that. Not us.

If you decide to go to court there are legal experts on this site that will help you every step of the way. But first you have to make the choice, you have to decide what you can live with.

This is ridiculous now. Thread closed.