Runnerup
Jun 12, 2012, 04:23 PM
Okay, I've been dating this guy for almost 3 years, he is a really a nice guy, has never called me any names, I don't believe he would cheat on me but I wonder if I'm a his runner up.
One night about 3 months after we were dating we were drinking and started discussing our old relationships, he explained that he had been in love twice before. First relationship - the girl's parents made them break up. Second relationship - she just decided one day she didn't want to be with him, he said it was completely out of the blue. He explained at that time they he was a romantic guy and that after she dumped him he told himself that he would never treat another lady like that again. Now this is his side of the story.
About a month after that conversation, I was at his house, he was on the computer and I went over to him and kissed him. I went outside to enjoy the summer evening, he soon joined me and was acting very weird (I guess thinking I had seen what he was doing). He made the comment that his ex-girlfriend had commented him on his Facebook that she thought I was a pretty girl and asked how long we've been dating and if we had plans for marriage. He told me that he commented back " almost 8 months and NO, you ruinned that for me." I expressed to him that that hurt my feelings, I didn't understand why he would say such a thing. He said that he was just joking and he said he was sorry. I left it alone.
One night he got drunk and left his FaceBook open, now I have learned my lesson because you never want to open pandora's box. I took a peak and saw that he and her had messaged each other before conversation above - he started the conversation with her - it start has Hey Sexy, and than asked for phone number of somebody that they both knew. She responded, "hey hope all is well" and she didn't have the number and that's it.
I was so upset - not that he talked to her but that he called her Sexy and he never compliments me at all. SERIOUSLY. Plus, I treat him damn good and she broke his heart. I found that to be a slap in my face. So I confronted him, he said there was nothing to it and apologized to me.
With the compliments I have sat down with him and have explained that I'm girl and I would like to complimented every so often and that I'm getting compliments from his friend and strangers on the street. And it would be nice if the man that I'm loving and dating would compliment me. He says he isn't a mushy guy.
Still at this very moment I think of it "hey SEXY and I'm still crushes, I guess all of these emotions came back when I was helping to get him packed for the move and ran across old photos of him and her, and some of just her (you blowing kisses etc.). He hasn't thrown them away and yes he is aware they still exist.
Also if anyone mentioned marriage he always says he'll never do it, but than when talking to his mother or Godmother (family) he wants to make it special and doesn't have the money to get the ring I deserve.
What do I do? I'm I the one who is having issues that I need to deal with or would you feel the same as me. I truly don't want to be someone's runner up.
Please someone help!!
One night about 3 months after we were dating we were drinking and started discussing our old relationships, he explained that he had been in love twice before. First relationship - the girl's parents made them break up. Second relationship - she just decided one day she didn't want to be with him, he said it was completely out of the blue. He explained at that time they he was a romantic guy and that after she dumped him he told himself that he would never treat another lady like that again. Now this is his side of the story.
About a month after that conversation, I was at his house, he was on the computer and I went over to him and kissed him. I went outside to enjoy the summer evening, he soon joined me and was acting very weird (I guess thinking I had seen what he was doing). He made the comment that his ex-girlfriend had commented him on his Facebook that she thought I was a pretty girl and asked how long we've been dating and if we had plans for marriage. He told me that he commented back " almost 8 months and NO, you ruinned that for me." I expressed to him that that hurt my feelings, I didn't understand why he would say such a thing. He said that he was just joking and he said he was sorry. I left it alone.
One night he got drunk and left his FaceBook open, now I have learned my lesson because you never want to open pandora's box. I took a peak and saw that he and her had messaged each other before conversation above - he started the conversation with her - it start has Hey Sexy, and than asked for phone number of somebody that they both knew. She responded, "hey hope all is well" and she didn't have the number and that's it.
I was so upset - not that he talked to her but that he called her Sexy and he never compliments me at all. SERIOUSLY. Plus, I treat him damn good and she broke his heart. I found that to be a slap in my face. So I confronted him, he said there was nothing to it and apologized to me.
With the compliments I have sat down with him and have explained that I'm girl and I would like to complimented every so often and that I'm getting compliments from his friend and strangers on the street. And it would be nice if the man that I'm loving and dating would compliment me. He says he isn't a mushy guy.
Still at this very moment I think of it "hey SEXY and I'm still crushes, I guess all of these emotions came back when I was helping to get him packed for the move and ran across old photos of him and her, and some of just her (you blowing kisses etc.). He hasn't thrown them away and yes he is aware they still exist.
Also if anyone mentioned marriage he always says he'll never do it, but than when talking to his mother or Godmother (family) he wants to make it special and doesn't have the money to get the ring I deserve.
What do I do? I'm I the one who is having issues that I need to deal with or would you feel the same as me. I truly don't want to be someone's runner up.
Please someone help!!