What should I do to get rid of this urge to have my FIRST TIME?
I am a normal silly teen at the age of 16 going to 17 in three months worrying about sex like most people would. For some reason a lot of people(mostly guys) keep asking me if I'm a virgin, it's none of their business but I tell them the truth since there is nothing wrong about it. So many guys ask me to have sex with them even if I don't kow them but are in my class in school, I tell them Im not that kind of girl and wouldn't dare do such a thing, even one of my guy friends wanted me to do it with him. Another thing is that I am also at the age to want to HAVE sex, but I want to stay a virgin, is that bad or impossible to do?
I try not to think about it and do my best to detract myself,I heard it can be painful,and I am a skinny person so it might hurt even more so I am also scared.It seems so complicated to want to do something and also not wanting to do it, I'm so confused, I even told my family and friends that I wouldn't. People might find this hard to believe but I have no interest in boys OR girls but just feel EXCITED when I see or hear something sexual, when my friends and I were talking about this they found that to be amazing. I don't want to be a hypocrite and not stick to my word, but I can't help it, WHAT SHOULD I DO?

Ask yourself these questions.

- Am I ready for a child?

And

- Can I afford a child?



If the answer to even one of these questions is no, which at almost 17, I'd hope that they both are. Then you should NOT have sex. I would probably sit down and have a chat with your mother, ask her for her advice, not ours. That's what she is there for, to help and to guide you.

I know the cause of having sex can lead to many things, and I don't want to have kids, I know my mom would be a good help since she is a parent, but I don't think she'll be any help to my urge problem. Thanks for telling me this, I'll just do my best not to have sex at my young age, I still have a life to choose.

You seem to be a very smart girl! It's true that your virginity, or lack thereof, is no one's business but your own. You shouldn't be embarrassed to tell them that it's your business and not theirs.

At your age you are having some major hormonal adjustments to your body, this is why you feel the urge to have sex. It's totally and completely normal.

All you have to say is that you are saving yourself for someone special and that you are not ready to be a parent.

Thinking about sex at your age is normal. One hundred years ago you would be getting ready for marriage, or would already be married. It was a lot easier to remain a virgin when the average age of marriage was 15-18 years of age.

But times have changed. Sadly, our bodies haven't. The urges you're feeling are normal, but acting on them could be catastrophic! At 16, in today's society, you're not ready to support a child. You're not ready for the very real consequences of sex.

I won't tell you to wait. You already seem to know that that's what you should do. I will only say that your virginity isn't something you should give away to the highest bidder, or some random guy, or friend, just because they want a V-card notch on their bed post.

You'll know when it's the right time, and the right person.

Listen, sex is a great and wonderful thing. But I can tell you that sex with a loving, committed (to a long relationship with you) partner will be much better. Sex makes each participant extremely vulnerable; you are giving you body away to someone and they can either use it or bless it. I hope this helps you and your urges!

All of your answers to my question is really helpful, Thank You.