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moiu
Jun 6, 2012, 03:00 AM
My name is moui, I got married to my boyfriend a year back. We were extremely happy till the last month. We both take out time for each other. Do activities together like gymming, swimming etc.
I adore him. I have always wholeheartedly supported my husband in everything that he wants to do, not only mentally or emotionally but financially as well. Majority of his salary goes to pay off a loan that he had to take for his parents, hence most of the financial support is provided by me and I do it happily. I have a job, yet I take out time to cook for him, clean the house etc. Everything was going fabulously, until a few weeks back when my husband started distancing himself from me. It was very subtle, but I could sense it. The husband who could not keep his hands off me, now had started avoiding me. Even if I tried to initiate sex, he would make some excuse and move away. One month back he joined salsa classes in his office, and was extremely excited about it. We used to learn salsa together 2 years back, but I had to leave it for a medical reasons. Now a days I cannot dance and I’m not much of a dancer anymore, but my husband is a great dancer. I noticed that the changes in him after he joined his salsa classes. Three weeks passed like this. In these three weeks we used to go out, party, gym everything as usual, but when we were alone at home, he would become aloof. He would treat me with kindness and respect but somehow ‘love and passion’ was missing. I decided to confront him. After a lot of cajoling he finally said that his parents are mentally pressurizing him, and asking for more monetary support. This was causing him depression and hence he was behaving in this manner with me. He also said, that because of this he has lost the urge for sex. I’m totally confused and have no one to confide in. Can a reason like this be really responsible for a doting, loving husband to turn cold in just one month? I also doubt that somehow salsa has something to do with it. Now that I cannot dance the way I could once, is it somehow making him feel attracted to someone in the class? I have this nagging doubt. There are a few girls who keep calling him from the salsa class. It makes me insanely jealous. We are a good-looking couple, but I'm more attractive of the two. I have never doubted my husband, neither have I felt jealous before, because I was very sure of our relationship and our love. But nothing seems to be the same again. If he is attracted to someone else, he is not telling me and its extremely frustrating for me to go on like this. I feel like a stranger in my own home. I don’t even know if my husband is physically attracted to me anymore. I don’t know how to get him back. I have absolutely no one to turn to for help, that’s why sharing my problem in this forum… Plzz help!

JudyKayTee
Jun 6, 2012, 03:42 AM
What Country?

Ask him - don't accuse him, ask him. He is your husband and you presumably discuss problems with each other. Maybe he's telling you the truth - he's depressed, doesn't want to have sex with anyone, finds an outlet in dancing.

You are the "more attractive of the two" of you? How does this come into play?