View Full Version : Is he shy, not interested or he likes me? Need guy's opinion...
euphoria123
Jun 5, 2012, 01:25 AM
I really need help with this guy I like a lot. We met couple months ago in the gym, it seems we always workout at the same time in cardio zone. He is always alone.
He was looking at me many times, when I looked back he looked down to the floor. I came to him and introduced myself, whenever we talk, he is just looking at me and can't talk, he is just smiling at me, other days he ignores me and I have to say "hi" to him.it is really hard to talk with him, so I have decided to write him a note(card), in that card I wrote, that he motivates me, inspire me and that I would like to be his friend and that we do not have to ignore each other. (because there were days he did cardio behind me, lookibg at me, but ignored me, when I catch his look, he looked away). So I gave him this card, he asked what is in, I said that he inspire me and that we do not gave to ignore each other. He was as usual short of words and said: wow I am speechless, thank you I had no idea and was smiling at me and looking into my eyes... deep look, very honest, I felt strong connection wizh him.then the other day I hoped we broke ice, but no.
We met in the gym, he looked at me and I smiled at him, he smiled back, it was very nice strong smile and look for couple seconds, no words.
Then I was leaving the gym and he was leaving at the same time. Very strange thing happened, as we were leaving he started to be so nervous, that he was almoust running out of the gym, quickly hold the se doors, but he was trying to escape from me, I felt he is afraid of me. Weird was that as we left and he was going away, he said: how are you doing... but he didn't turn his head to me, he was actually walking away from me and asking this question.I am so confused.
Then other day I was in the gym in aerobic room taking a class and I could see him almost the whole time working out on machines from which he could see me, at least I saw him the whole time and it is a big gym, so if he would want hide, he could, he didn't realize I see him in the mirror. When I finished the class he was training on the machine in my way to ghe locker room, he freezed up, no move, just freeze and looking ahead, like he was expecting me to talk to him, but because he was facing back (sure he saw me in mirrors that I am passing him), I did not say anything.. I actually feel rejected by him.
Yesterday I met him in the gym, girlfriend was with me and whenever he seez me, he looks so surprise to see me, never talk, looked into my eyes, quick smile, but no words.
I really do not know what zo do. I approached him with that card, now I think he should show his intetest and some action. I do not want to bother him, make him nervous. I like him a lot, even more, because he is so hard to read, but I feel stupid and do not know what to do.
What is your advice, opinion about this guy? We are both around 30. WHAT IS GOING ON IN HIS (MEN'S HEAD)?
rocketman11
Jun 5, 2012, 02:27 AM
I really need help with this guy i like a lot. We met couple months ago in the gym, it seems we always workout at the same time in cardio zone. He is always alone.
He was looking at me many times, when i looked back he looked down to the floor. I came to him and introduced myself, whenever we talk, he is just looking at me and can't talk, he is just smiling at me, other days he ignores me and i have to say "hi" to him.it is really hard to talk with him, so i have decided to write him a note(card), in that card i wrote, that he motivates me, inspire me and that i would like to be his friend and that we do not have to ignore each other. (because there were days he did cardio behind me, lookibg at me, but ignored me, when i catch his look, he looked away). So i gave him this card, he asked what is in, i said that he inspire me and that we do not gave to ignore each other. He was as usual short of words and said: wow i am speechless, thank you i had no idea and was smiling at me and looking into my eyes...deep look, very honest, i felt strong connection wizh him.then the other day i hoped we broke ice, but no.
We met in the gym, he looked at me and i smiled at him, he smiled back, it was very nice strong smile and look for couple seconds, no words.
Then i was leaving the gym and he was leaving at the same time. Very strange thing happened, as we were leaving he started to be so nervous, that he was almoust running out of the gym, quickly hold the se doors, but he was trying to escape from me, i felt he is afraid of me. Weird was that as we left and he was going away, he said: how are you doing...but he didnt turn his head to me, he was actually walking away from me and asking this question.i am so confused.
Then other day i was in the gym in aerobic room taking a class and i could see him almost the whole time working out on machines from which he could see me, at least i saw him the whole time and it is a big gym, so if he would want hide, he could, he didnt realize i see him in the mirror. When i finished the class he was training on the machine in my way to ghe locker room, he freezed up, no move, just freeze and looking ahead, like he was expecting me to talk to him, but because he was facing back (sure he saw me in mirrors that i am passing him), i did not say anything..i actually feel rejected by him.
Yesterday i met him in the gym, girlfriend was with me and whenever he seez me, he looks so surprise to see me, never talk, looked into my eyes, quick smile, but no words.
I really do not know what zo do. I approached him with that card, now i think he should show his intetest and some action. I do not want to bother him, make him nervous. I like him a lot, even more, because he is so hard to read, but i feel stupid and do not know what to do.
What is your advice, opinion about this guy? We are both around 30. WHAT IS GOING ON IN HIS (MEN'S HEAD)?
He sounds like a very shy guy.
His actions seem to suggest that he likes you a lot because he gets so nervous. I know how he feels because in the past I have displayed very similar behavior.
When he sees you his heart will begin to race and he will get a million thoughts in his head but won't be able to do anything about them. He will have one voice telling him to go for it and then another voice telling him why he shouldn't. He will be thinking things like: 'wow she's beautiful, but she too good for me' and 'i wonder if she will like me, but I am too shy, no one likes a shy guy' e.t.c. He will essentially be thinking of reasons he can't have you, and this will lower his confidence and make him even more nervous, that is why he freezes up.
All I ask is that you tell him how you feel. If you like him as much as you say you do, why not try and make it work? If you are honest and open up to him he will probably open up to you. Shy guys are usually the nicest guys, so give it a try. :)
euphoria123
Jun 5, 2012, 09:11 AM
Thank you for your reply.
I would come to him and talk, but as I sai, whenever I come to him, he just freeze and is looking as you said on one side happy and on the other frighten. I do not want to be too pushy and make it worse. But you are right, this goes on for couple months. I will come to talk to him, but after I told him he motivates me and inspires me, why he did not say: let's train one day together. Or at least could come to me and say thank you for the card... we are not teenagers. It is simply polite. When I met him, he was extremely polite. When he talks to some friends (but not very often, most of the time is lonely) he seems fun, relaxed and OK, well behaved. With me he has a problem to say "hi" and "bye" and ignores me, but sure looking at me secretely. Also he wears a cross ring on left hands. So I am thinking about it all. And do not know.
QUOTE=rocketman11;3140899]He sounds like a very shy guy.
His actions seem to suggest that he likes you a lot because he gets so nervous. I know how he feels because in the past I have displayed very similar behavior.
When he sees you his heart will begin to race and he will get a million thoughts in his head but won't be able to do anything about them. He will have one voice telling him to go for it and then another voice telling him why he shouldn't. He will be thinking things like: 'wow she's beautiful, but she too good for me' and 'i wonder if she will like me, but I am too shy, no one likes a shy guy' e.t.c. He will essentially be thinking of reasons he can't have you, and this will lower his confidence and make him even more nervous, that is why he freezes up.
All I ask is that you tell him how you feel. If you like him as much as you say you do, why not try and make it work? If you are honest and open up to him he will probably open up to you. Shy guys are usually the nicest guys, so give it a try. :)[/QUOTE]
C0bra_M3nace
Jun 5, 2012, 09:41 AM
Working up the courage is the hardest part. Trust me I know, being that picked on outcast kid all through middle school I had no self-esteem nor courage to do that. Once I got into high school, I made a few friends, started to earn my self-esteem and confidence back. I worked so hard to ask the first girl I really liked out, took me about 3 weeks to get the phrase "Would you go to a movie with me sometime?". I thought my heart was going to get up and run away right up until I mumbled the words out. Mind you I got rejected, thougthfully rejected to add. She said she just considered us friends, and apologized, but let me tell you, was that ever exciting. You may think getting turned down, or rejected hurts but if you work so hard just to ask, no matter the outcome you can't help but pat yourself on the back and say "I did it! I really did it!". After that I had no trouble talking to girls, in fact that's how I landed my high school sweetheart. I don't think meeting her the first time would have been the same had I not had the confidence I had.
Lifes about taking chances, you win some you lose some, but you've got to try.
My father always used to tell me.
"You miss 100% of the swings you don't take."
Sometimes you don't realize it until it's too late. Don't let it be.
euphoria123
Jun 5, 2012, 11:02 AM
That is so well said. I feel I have to try, because I am sure or I think he will never make a move. So far moves he made were that he came closer to me or behind me, but always so shy and quiet and also always so nervous. I never met such a strange or shy man. I actually like it so much about him, because he never flirt with anyone.
I think I have the courage today and ask him if he wants to train together or just talk after the gym. It is so weird that man can be shy also in his 30.
True is that lot of men around are giving me compliments every day, I always say thank you and smile, but do not flirt. I know he is watching. I always feel the tension between us.
Thank you again.
UOTE=C0bra_M3nace;3141270]Working up the courage is the hardest part. Trust me I know, being that picked on outcast kid all through middle school I had no self-esteem nor courage to do that. Once I got into high school, I made a few friends, started to earn my self-esteem and confidence back. I worked so hard to ask the first girl I really liked out, took me about 3 weeks to get the phrase "Would you go to a movie with me sometime?". I thought my heart was going to get up and run away right up until I mumbled the words out. Mind you I got rejected, thougthfully rejected to add. She said she just considered us friends, and apologized, but let me tell you, was that ever exciting. You may think getting turned down, or rejected hurts but if you work so hard just to ask, no matter the outcome you can't help but pat yourself on the back and say "I did it! I really did it!". After that I had no trouble talking to girls, in fact that's how I landed my high school sweetheart. I don't think meeting her the first time would have been the same had I not had the confidence I had.
Lifes about taking chances, you win some you lose some, but you've got to try.
My father always used to tell me.
"You miss 100% of the swings you don't take."
Sometimes you don't realize it until it's too late. Don't let it be.[/QUOTE]
aliseaodo
Jun 5, 2012, 11:21 AM
You said he had a ring on his left hand? Is it possible he's a married man? Maybe that's why he's acting weird...
euphoria123
Jun 5, 2012, 11:34 AM
You said he had a ring on his left hand? Is it possible he's a married man? Maybe that's why he's acting weird...
Sorry, right hand... no left
euphoria123
Jun 5, 2012, 11:37 AM
Sorry, right hand...no left
I noticed the ring as he opened the door for me. It was on right hand and it was massive silver ring with cross, so he might be very religious. I am not originally american, so I do not know how serious are men about wearing a cross ring. It can be also just a piece of jewellery.
C0bra_M3nace
Jun 5, 2012, 11:43 AM
That is so well said. I feel i have to try, because i am sure or i think he will never make a move. So far moves he made were that he came closer to me or behind me, but always so shy and quiet and also always so nervous. I never met such a strange or shy man. I actually like it so much about him, because he never flirt with anyone.
I think i have the courage today and ask him if he wants to train together or just talk after the gym. It is so weird that man can be shy also in his 30.
True is that lot of men around are giving me compliments every day, i always say thank you and smile, but do not flirt. I know he is watching. I always feel the tension between us.
Thank you again.
Go for it sweetheart, you've got nothing to lose.