My ex and I have been together for 6 1/2 years. We are each others best friends and love each other to death. We grew dependent on each other when we moved in together and I got lazy. I lost a job the month before and the 2 months that we lived together is when things got bad. I got negative, boring, predictable, and unreliable. She would try and push me in the right direction and I took it as nagging. We fought every day. She would work hard, then go to school full time. Come home to me still in my PJ's in the afternoon. I was becoming a unmotivated slob and she didn't like it at all. We had a huge fight about a month ago and she moved out. She said she isn't happy and wants to be strong and independent for once. She said if I get my sh!t together then she would date me again in the fall and see what happens. We went no contact for a month. In that time, I have gone to bar tending school, got a job, and started working out and feeling more positive about myself again. I feel great. I had a couple of slips where I would call her, but she didn't mind. But, if I brought up the relationship at all, then she would get defensive and said she just wanted to be friends.

I realize that I don't need her but I want her in my life. We hung out yesterday and had a great time as "friends". She called me for the first time and asked to hang out right when she woke up. She was impressed with how I looked and seemed interested in me being driven again about life. She would try on clothes and wanted my opinion on how she looked. She let me hug her and she flirted back, just not too much. At the end of the day I said "I had fun, we should do it again some time" She agreed and I left. I got a text later saying "I had a great time today thanks :)" Anyway, I was supposed to go to a club tonight and she was hanging out at friends at a bar. I popped my head into the bar before I went to the club to say hi. She seemed happy to see me and I said it would be a quick visit because I'm going clubbing. We had a few drinks and I told her that I was leaving "pretending to not care lulz". She said "wait, let me walk you out"

I held her hand on the way to the car and I said a quick goodbye. She looked sad and wouldn't let me close the door. She said "you're cute and you're making this so hard on me" I said I loved her and cared about her. Then, she brought up relationship stuff. She says that she wanted to have sex with me tonight and yesterday when we hung out and thinks about me all the time. She said she is attracted to me, but knows she wants to feel strong. I don't blame her, but I wasn't trying to bring up any relationship stuff and she ruined the night with drama. I was just trying to have a good time. She obviously cares about me very much, so I guess its back to no contact again. But, I think I have the power this time over her. She is obviously missing me, but I don't know what to do to fully get her back.

It's not about having power over her. You keep doing what you're doing. Showing her this side of you.
She knows what she wants to do and does not want sex or attraction to stand in the way, this is what she was saying to you. Don't push or rush or play games. Just keep doing what you've been doing.
If you two are meant to be she will come back.

It's not about having power over her. You keep doing what you're doing. Showing her this side of you.
She knows what she wants to do and does not want sex or attraction to stand in the way, this is what she was saying to you. Don't push or rush or play games. Just keep doing what you've been doing.
If you two are meant to be she will come back.

I totally agree with homegirl. If you are too pushy, it will push her away. Stay casual.

I did everything your not suppose to do when a girl breaks up with you I did it out of emations though. Begging her, being needy, trying little tricks to get her back, at times not giving her the space she asked for. Until one day we we were texting back and fourth kind of going at it and she told me to lose her number after that I kind of just gave up like forget, I haven't contaced her in a month in a half or seen her in 5 months. I also found out one mon th after she broke up with me she was kicking with and having sex with some other dude and probably is still kicking it with him to this day she doesn't know that I know but I know. I wonder a lot to I even have a chance future wise with her or is it a wrap I pushed her away forever? I made a lot of bad decisions lyin about dumb things, breaking her trust for me, be lazy and a stand still. Now though I am really doing good for myself and am getting back to the old me which feels good I hope my ex and I can get back together future wise I really do I still believe and feel she is the one for me and I don't see myself with anybody else yeah I made some bad decisions but I owned up to them and changed for the better. What should I do??

Emotions*

I did everthing your not suppose to do when a girl breaks up with you I did it out of emations though. Begging her, being needy, trying lil tricks to get her back, at times not giving her the space she asked for. Until one day we we were texting back and fourth kinda going at it and she told me to lose her number after that I kinda just gave up like forget, I haven't contaced her in a month in a half or seen her in 5 months. I also found out one mon th after she broke up with me she was kickin with and having sex with some other dude and prolly is still kickin it with him to this day she doesn't know that I know but I know. I wonder alot to I even have a chance future wise with her or is it a wrap I pushed her away forever? I made alot of bad decisions lyin about dumb things, breaking her trust for me, be lazy and a stand still. Now though I am really doing good for myself and am getting back to the old me which feels good I hope my ex and I can get back together future wise I really do I still believe and feel she is the one for me and I don't see myself with anybody else yeah I made some bad decisions but I owned up to them and changed for the better. What should I do?????

Ask your question on a separate thread. Don't hijack this one.