Okay so I am 13F.

And I have depression/anxiety/and frequent mood swings. I have slit my wrists due to anger. I daydream about killing. Without a path. I have been taking medicine for it but it doesn't work. I can't trust any one because in my mind everyone wants to harm me. I do almost everything to harm me... smoke, cut, aimlessly walking. I am constantly trying to cause me pain. When people make me mad I want to hurt me instead of them. I don't know what is keeping me from going all the way... But I see and in the future I will be dead. I already know how I am going to commit suicide.

No one believes me. Everyone thinks I am doing this for attention and I am not. I am shy and I dislike attention.

Help me please!

And don't be rude I get enough of that already!


Sr13

okay so i am 13F.

and i have depression/anxiety/and frequent mood swings. I have slit my wrists due to anger. I daydream about killing. Without a path. I have been taking medicine for it but it doesn't work. I can't trust any one because in my mind everyone wants to harm me. I do almost everything to harm me...smoke, cut, aimlessly walking. I am constantly trying to cause me pain. When people make me mad i wanna hurt me instead of them. I don't know what is keeping me from going all the way... But i see and in the future i will be dead. I already know how i am going to commit suicide.

no one believes me. Everyone thinks i am doing this for attention and i am not. I am shy and i dislike attention.

help me please!

and don't be rude i get enough of that already!


sr13
And if it doesn't work, then why aren't you telling your psychiatrist that? So your medications can be adjusted or changed.

Yes, you have some type of problem, and if you are not getting professional help you need to.

And if it doesn't work, then why aren't you telling your psychiatrist that? So your medications can be adjusted or changed.

I do and all he does is up the dose--just more meds... im still crying every night. I have been taking the pills for about 3-5 months now!

Yes, you have some type of problem, and if you are not getting professional help you need to.

Thanks... Glad to know I'm crazy! (no sarcasm)

Only 3-5 months... then he is still working on finding the right medication and dosage for you yet. With these you don't change them overnight because their effect grows with time... and a you don't get an immediate reaction. SO while it appears painfully slow... there is a reason for that. And changes may take a month or more to see how its going to work. As I said... because results are not immediate. And going too much too soon can be more dangerous than not enough.

Only 3-5 months...then he is still working on finding the right medication and dosage for you yet. With these you don't change them overnight because their effect grows with time....and a you don't get an immediate reaction.

So... What I have to wait years for this to kick in? I would've killed myself by then! I need urgent help!

Are you meeting with a counselor or therapist for chat sessions at least twice a week?

Are you meeting with a counselor or therapist for chat sessions at least twice a week?

I met with my therapist 5 days out of a week. But I don't anymore after something "sinister" happened between my therapist and me. And I can't find another :/

Five times in one week? What happened?

You MUST find another therapist.

Years isn't the case... months likely... maybe by the one year mark they will have it figured out for you.

Seriously... no two people respond the same way to the same medicines... so there will be dosage changes and even medicine changes before they find what works best for you.

I didn't do this personally.. but a very close friend did a few years back... they have her very well controlled now. But it was really rocky that first year.

And that is the same no matter what med is prescribed -- blood pressure, cold medicine, antibiotics, etc.

Five times in one week? What happened?

You MUST find another therapist.

Life...

:''/

I see. You'd rather get enmeshed in drama than do something important and helpful for yourself.

I see. You'd rather get enmeshed in drama than do something important and helpful for yourself.

Please don't be rude :)

I try... You think I want to be like this?!

Whenever I ask for help there is always at least one person that has to be rude...

Sr13

I made a strong suggestion (because I am a therapist), and you brushed if off very casually. So what am I to think?

No, I don't think you are trying at all, OR you are VERY trying...

I'm still wondering how you got away from the care of the first therapist.

I made a strong suggestion (because I am a therapist), and you brushed if off very casually. So what am I to think?

No, I don't think you are trying at all,. OR you are VERY trying....

I'm still wondering how you got away from the care of the first therapist.

I don't know who you are... For all I know you could be a pedo...

I am just trying to get some help that is all...

And you don't have to help if you don't want to...

I don't want to up anybody's life...


Rebel Against

I really, really am a therapist. And I am trying to help, but you have shot me down ever since I started.

Now, let's start over. Why can't you find another therapist? That's very important while your meds are being figured out.

I really, really am a therapist. And I am trying to help, but you have shot me down ever since I started.

Now, let's start over. Why can't you find another therapist? That's very important while your meds are being figured out.


Okay... Clean slate

I am afraid. I can not trust anyone--not even myself--every one is trying to harm me...

All the more reason you need to find a therapist and work that out.

Has anyone harmed you so far?

All the more reason you need to find a therapist and work that out.

Has anyone harmed you so far?


No one except myself... But I always see... Like when my best friends reaches for a hug I think she is secretly trying to strangle me...

So you self harm, but no one so far has tried to hurt you? You are your own worst enemy, mentally as well as physically?

So you self harm, but no one so far has tried to hurt you? You are your own worst enemy, mentally as well as physically?

Yes... And I guess so... But I hate my family, race, friends, almost everyone I know... I only truly care about 2 adults... and 1 is NOT my mother. Or father

Who are the two adults? Why do you care about them?

Who are the two adults? Why do you care about them?

1: Natania
2. Kari

They are the only people who make me feel loved and special :) they listen and they don't judge me for who I am... They are just... There... And I love them :)

Everyone else judges you. No one else listens.

Everyone else judges you. No one else listens.


Yep...

My friends laugh
And every one... Doesn't like me... Hell I don't like myself :P

Please don't be rude :P

Please don't start new threads on the same subject. I merged your two on mental health.

No one is being rude. We're all trying to get at what is going on with you and what you are so unhappy about.

Listen to Wondergirl... she knows what she's talking about, she IS trying to help you, or she wouldn't be wasting her time with you, neither of us would be... besides she is a bigshot at this site.

Please don't start new threads on the same subject. I merged your two on mental health.

No one is being rude. We're all trying to get at what is going on with you and what you are so unhappy about.


Well I didn't know... What is this a game you're playing?

I'm confused... It seems as if you don't want to help me... You're just being a smart... Sorry I am an honest person...

And well you're being mean/rude to me... Im new here and I just want help not judgements... Is that too much to ask?



Rebel against all that hurt you--

well i didn't know... What is this a game you're playing?

im confused... It seems as if you don't wanna help me... You're just being a smart ... Sorry i am an honest person....

and well you're being mean/rude to me... Im new here and i just want help not judgements... Is that too much to ask?



rebel against all that hurt you--
Woooo Nelly, chill pill time... Wondergirl is being anything BUT what you just said about her. If you want help... you HAVE to listen to others... you are the one being judgmental here.

Woooo Nelly, chill pill time....Wondergirl is being anything BUT what you just said about her. If you want help...you HAVE to listen to others...you are the one being judgmental here.


I didn't say anything about precious "wondergirl" I was speaking in general...

And I don't WANT help I NEED IT!

And I already take pills to keep me sane thank you...


Kill all

i didn't say anything about precious "wondergirl" i was speaking in general....

and i don't WANT help i NEED IT!

and i already take pills to keep me sane thank you...


kill all
Need it.. want it... same difference... if you don't listen to anyone else... then nothing is going to get better. And trust me... its really easy to walk away and just ignore you if you want to get rude with people, who I might add, are not getting paid a single cent to try to help you. We are all volunteers... we don't get paid.

Does this attitude have something to do with why you aren't seeing that therapist? I'm betting it is... you can learn a lot about people by not what they say... but HOW they say it.

[QUOTE=smoothy;3137248]Need it.. want it... same difference... if you don't listen to anyone else... then nothing is going to get better. And trust me... its really easy to walk away and just ignore you if you want to get rude with people, who I might add, are not getting paid a single cent to try to help you. We are all volunteers... we don't get paid.

Does this attitude have something to do with why you aren't seeing that therapist? I'm betting it is... you can learn a lot about people by not what they say... but HOW they say it.[/QUOTE}

This is exactly why I want to die... Now you hate me and I honestly don't understand what I did wrong! My therapist left because I lied on him so I wouldn't have to go to a mental hospital... And he got in A lot of trouble... But he hurt me first... He stabbed me in the back first...


So I needed to get me revenge...


I ALWAYS GET MY REVENGE NO MATTER THE OUTCOME!


Rebelagainstall

How on earth could a therapist get in trouble because you lied? That makes no sense.

How on earth could a therapist get in trouble because you lied? That makes no sense.


It was a BIG LIE ;P

Doesn't matter how big it was. The mental health field is very smart and on top of the wiles of clients. What was the big lie?

I don't hate you... I can get upset easily (but I also calm down quickly)... but you have to REALLY try hard to get me to hate you.

Doesn't matter how big it was. The mental health field is very smart and on top of the wiles of clients. What was the big lie?

Obviously you don't care...

But thanks... I guess :D

SinisterRebel13

"Obviously I don't care"? Where did that come from?

i don't hate you.....i can get upset easily (but i also calm down quickly)...but you have to really try hard to get me to hate you.

:p

"Obviously I don't care"? Where did that come from?

Who knows?
I'm crazy :P

You're also bound and determined not to say anything useful or to connect with anyone here. You're hoping we will all leave in disgust so you can say, "They hate me."

I'm going to bed... not hating anyone... because its 11:30 PM and I have to get up early in the morning.

so... What i have to wait years for this to kick in? I would've killed myself by then! I need urgent help!


Here's a thought - take your rude self SOMEWHERE and speak to SOMEONE in person.

Yes, you have a mental issue - possibly two mental issues. Plus attitude.

I just read this thread, the whole thing, and all I can say is, did I miss something?

When was Wondergirl rude? Did I miss it? Was the post deleted?

Where does this poster get off coming here asking for help, and then doing everything possible to make us not want to help him/her?

You need a therapist. You need to start wanting to get help, and stop thinking everyone is out to get you. You need to take your meds.

Just so you know, I'm not being rude either. I'm being honest. You came here with a huge chip on your shoulder asking for help, and when people tried to help, you did nothing but shoot them down.

We volunteer here. Unlike your therapist, we don't get paid, so guess what sweetie, we don't have to put up with any crap. If we don't want to help, we don't. You had people here willing to help, and you were nothing but rude to them. We all have a families, jobs, and a life. We come here of our own free time, because we want to help. But we only help the people that are actually looking for help. Not those looking to fight, looking to prove something, calling the experts rude, when they were anything but rude.

Really, did you think you'd post your question, a question as serious as this, and someone would come along and say "oh, just take 2 aspirin, spin in a circle, say jumanji three times, tap your nose and you'll be fine?" If therapists and meds can't cure you did you really think anyone online could?

Here are the facts. These people are good people, even me, despite the fact that your attitude really ticked me off. Come here, apologize to those trying to help you, and they'll all come back willing to do anything they can to help, including me. But don't come here asking for help and then crapping on everyone that offers to help. That doesn't fly here.

I just read this thread, the whole thing, and all I can say is, did I miss something?

When was Wondergirl rude? Did I miss it? Was the post deleted?

Where does this poster get off coming here asking for help, and then doing everything possible to make us not want to help him/her?

You need a therapist. You need to start wanting to get help, and stop thinking everyone is out to get you. You need to take your meds.

Just so you know, I'm not being rude either. I'm being honest. You came here with a huge chip on your shoulder asking for help, and when people tried to help, you did nothing but shoot them down.

We volunteer here. Unlike your therapist, we don't get paid, so guess what sweetie, we don't have to put up with any crap. If we don't want to help, we don't. You had people here willing to help, and you were nothing but rude to them. We all have a families, jobs, and a life. We come here of our own free time, because we want to help. But we only help the people that are actually looking for help. Not those looking to fight, looking to prove something, calling the experts rude, when they were anything but rude.

Really, did you think you'd post your question, a question as serious as this, and someone would come along and say "oh, just take 2 aspirin, spin in a circle, say jumanji three times, tap your nose and you'll be fine?" If therapists and meds can't cure you did you really think anyone online could?

Here are the facts. These people are good people, even me, despite the fact that your attitude really ticked me off. Come here, apologize to those trying to help you, and they'll all come back willing to do anything they can to help, including me. But don't come here asking for help and then crapping on everyone that offers to help. That doesn't fly here.

This thread is old... I am finally getting the help I need and taking medications that are helping... I am so very sorry for the way I acted... I realized I was angry at myself and I was the rude one


I hope I am forgiven :D

But you just acted that way again during the past fifteen minutes on another thread. So I believe you are sorry? I don't think so. (And this :D didn't help at all!)

But you just acted that way again during the past fifteen minutes on another thread. So I believe you are sorry? I don't think so. (And this :D didn't help at all!)

I am confused what did I do? And what is a "reddie" I don't even know what that is!

If you all want me off the site I will go without hesitation...

this thread is old... i am finally getting the help i need and taking medications that are helping..... i am so very sorry for the way i acted... i realized i was angry at myself and i was the rude one


i hope i am forgiven :D

Old? This thread was posted a week ago! You really expect me to believe that you've been helped within a week?

Kid, I was born at night, but not last night. Besides, I saw the Ouija thread, and I'm not buying a word of what you say.

You're on thin ice with me, and I am watching every post you make and every disagree you hand out. So no, you're not forgiven. Start acting civil, read the rules, show that you're capable of learning, and most importantly, prove that you aren't a troll, and we'll see. Keep it up and I'll ask the mods to cut you off.

If you think you can pull the wool over my eyes, you're dreaming. I'm not some bored housewife with a soft spot for a sob story. I survived more in my first 10 years of life then you'll ever have to survive, if you're lucky. I'm not a fool, so don't think you can come here, bat your little eyes, throw out an apology while you're dissing respected member of this site on another thread, and I'll fall for it. Not likely!

When you click "Inaccurate" (which no one was, by the way), that gives the responder a kick in the head and a red mark that demotes him/her a notch.

Old? This thread was posted a week ago! You really expect me to believe that you've been helped within a week?

Kid, I was born at night, but not last night. Besides, I saw the Ouija thread, and I'm not buying a word of what you say.

You're on thin ice with me, and I am watching every post you make and every disagree you hand out. So no, you're not forgiven. Start acting civil, read the rules, show that you're capable of learning, and most importantly, prove that you aren't a troll, and we'll see. Keep it up and I'll ask the mods to cut you off.

If you think you can pull the wool over my eyes, you're dreaming. I'm not some bored housewife with a soft spot for a sob story. I survived more in my first 10 years of life then you'll ever have to survive, if you're lucky. I'm not a fool, so don't think you can come here, bat your little eyes, throw out an apology while you're dissing respected member of this site on another thread, and I'll fall for it. Not likely!

I didn't say I was cured... but I am getting help. I have a new therapist and everything... but okay... I will go...

When you click "Inaccurate" (which no one was, by the way), that gives the responder a kick in the head and a red mark that demotes him/her a notch.

But I didn't click it I swear... I clicked "helpful" I nnow I see what you all are saying but when I go back to the page it says I thought it was inaccurate... but I didn't... but I know you alll are pissed and won't believe a word I say... but I honestly didn't try to

but i didn't click it i swear.... i clicked "helpful" i nnow i see what you all are saying but when i go back to the page it says i thought it was inaccurate... but i didn't... but i know you alll are pissed and won't believe a word i say..... but i honestly didnt try to


When you click accurate, that's all it is, a click. When you click inaccurate, the site prompts a second section, asking you to explain, or post a link, as to why the post was inaccurate. So you're right, I don't believe that it was a mistake, especially in light of what you said to and about wondergirl in this thread.

Do you really think we're that naïve?

I'm willing to give you another chance, but I'm telling you right now, you're on my radar, and I don't suffer fools or trolls. Change your ways, and you're more than welcome to stay. Keep doing what you're doing, and the decision to stay or go won't be yours. If you want to play games, find another playground to play in.

This is a respected site, because of the members we have. I won't sit by while you diss people I have grown to respect and care about, and make a mockery out of what we do here.

We're not stupid. You'd be wise to remember that, and keep it in mind when you post.

Your choice. We don't turn people away if they really need help. But we don't put up with bull either.

When you click accurate, that's all it is, a click. When you click inaccurate, the site prompts a second section, asking you to explain, or post a link, as to why the post was inaccurate. So you're right, I don't believe that it was a mistake, especially in light of what you said to and about wondergirl in this thread.

Do you really think we're that naive?

I'm willing to give you another chance, but I'm telling you right now, you're on my radar, and I don't suffer fools or trolls. Change your ways, and you're more than welcome to stay. Keep doing what you're doing, and the decision to stay or go won't be yours. If you want to play games, find another playground to play in.

This is a respected site, because of the members we have. I won't sit by while you diss people I have grown to respect and care about, and make a mockery out of what we do here.

We're not stupid. You'd be wise to remember that, and keep it in mind when you post.

Your choice. We don't turn people away if they really need help. But we don't put up with bull either.

Okay... still confused but just leave me alone I won't use this site anymore! But can I ask you one thing? If you are so pissed at me... why keep replying?

Sinister, do you hear voices? Do you see things that aren't there? Do you get violent to the point that you can't control it?

I'm a nurse and I'm not here to judge you, or be mean to you. But you HAVE to answer my/our questions so that we can help you.

okay... still confused but just leave me alone i wont use this site anymore! but can i ask you one thing? if you are so pissed at me.... why keep replying?

That makes no sense.

You said you won't use this site anymore, so how would you know that I'm replying? In fact, why are you posting now? You're not using the site anymore, right? Wait... then you're not really here! Oh, there you are. I guess you lied.

I told you kiddo. You're on my radar. I'm watching what you post, because of what you've posted so far. Until you can be real, I'll be watching. When you post the truth, start following the rules of the site, I'll stop watching your posts.

If you think one fake apology, professing that you're cured after a week, and then posting more crap, dishing out reddies, makes it all good, then you're wrong.

I told you kiddo, I wasn't born last night. You're not dealing with some goodie goodie with rose colored glasses on. You dish it out, I dish it back. Want to start telling the truth now?

You don't have to leave the site, but until you start being real, I will be watching. Start being real, and I won't have anything but advice to post. If you really want help, I'll be first in line to help you. If you keep doing what you've been doing since you joined this site, I'll keep watching, and I won't let you get away with it. Do we understand each other?

You have to make the first move here, and not the fake moves you've been making. You be real, stop being a troll, and everyone on this site, even those you dissed, will be lining up to help. That I can promise you, because we're good people! So stop messing with us! Be real! Be kind! Be appreciative, because frankly, there are other people on this site that actually want help. Why are you wasting our time on someone that doesn't?

i am confused what did i do? and what is a "reddie" i don"t even know what that is!

if you all want me off the site i will go without hesitation.........................


Yes, I think that's a good idea. You will stop disrupting AMHD, apparently you solved your own problem in a couple of days, you can walk away with the "everyone hates me" chip intact on your shoulder.

OR you can answer the people who are asking questions in an attempt to help you. You must live in a very lonely, troubled world. Why not let some strangers who won't/can't judge you have some answers and see what they can suggest?

You are clearly conflicted - you are shy and don't want/like attention BUT you are here, threatening to leave, posting, posting, posting.

I believe you are 13 - is that what I read somewhere? Where are your parents in all of this, your school? In MY area you make suicide threats (and that includes on line threats) and you find yourself out of regular school and in special needs school. If it is found that the parents are not stepping up, then you find yourself in foster care.

You must live in a dark world. Why not share some of that instead of being confrontational?