Im a 38 year old single woman who has had it! My only child was taken from me at the age of 2 and I have felt like a worthless failure since! I sink into extreme bouts of depression, cut myself and honestly feel like I deserve everything bad thing that I get! The only thing keeping me from finally ending it all is knowing this would be the final blow for my 17 year old son! I know I'm doing him more harm than good and he is better off without me so I am looking for a way to make my death look accidental. If its ruled accidental then my son will get my life insurance and this would pay for college and he would have at least half a chance for a future! What is the best way to accomplish this?

No one is going to help you with ideas for suicide. That is not the answer. THAT is what would harm your son more than anything.

When was the last time you saw a doctor about your depression, and how it has been affecting your life and decisions? Are you currently on any sort of medication for your depression? Have you ever been on any medication for it? Are you seeing a therapist or psychologist? Have you ever spent time in rehab for help either in-patient or out-patient?

Have you went to counseling for your depression.