neha_777n
May 23, 2012, 11:55 PM
I'm a 28 year old girl. I loved a man whose age is 33 years. We met through mobile chatting five years ago.. that time I was doing my mba.. we never met in these 5 years. We used to sms and talk through phone daily for hours.. my mom died when I was 19. So I depended a lot emotionally on this man. He used to take care of me and was so loving all the time.. in my eyes he was the right man for me.. we were planning to marry this year.. but his salary was low so I kept on telling him to find a good job as I'm from a very good and financially sound family n didn't want that my father rejects him for this reason n also we should not face any problem in future.he kept on agreeing to me always.. also we have seen each others photo through email.. he was average looking n I am very beautiful.. but in these 5 yrs he disappeared 3 times without telling me, when he went home n I use to cry n fear if he's fine or not.. first time he disappeared after 2 years when we met for 3 months saying his father took a loan and could not repay so he went home to help him.. n switched off his cell for 3 months.. my condition was very bad that time.. n aft that he returned n told me he didn't had even 10 rupees to call me.. daT I couldn't believe and asked him many questions why he did so or did he marry another girl but he made me to believe him n after that 1 yr later he told me he is going to nomansland near border as he is in army for 3 months n so can't call me as there will be no phones so told me to just mail him every week n he will also mail . That time I had a lot of doubt on him n asked for his home address n he gave me some random address.. but after 3 months he said he will be there some more time like this he passed a year n I kept on waiting n crying for him as he was my 1st true love ever.. n then he came back n after 3 months again left for home when his cousin brother died of cancer for a month n again dissappeared though this time he promised me to call.. n after coming back again he called me n said my mother didn't let me go outside home as she feared something will happen to me also . N again I believed him like a fool but we used to have fights on phone due to all his stupid n hard to believe reasons..
den he told me smoked a lot when he was away for a year as he missed me a lot.. so he had some chest pain n feared he might have a heart problem. He went to doctor for echo n tmt tests which he said came normal.. but still took heart medicines.. n I cried a lot as I don't ever want to loose him.. then a year passed lik this.. n suddenly last year in October during diwaLI time he went home n on the first day itself we fought over some silly thing n he switched off his cell till evening n when he switched on told me that he is not suitable for me as he doesn't have a good job, is average looking n his family background is not nice as his father drinks n beats his mom since he was small.. n also his fourth sister n her daughter are living with his parents as her husband is of bad character..
so he didn't want to ruin my life n dats y want to break off.. but I cried n made him understand that I love him d most in this world n these things doesn't matter to me.. n then he somewhat became OK but the next 15 days his behaviour changed n he didn't use to talk to me much like before.. previously we used to share each n every little thing with each other.. n on the last day he was going to his new posting in delhi he talked to me in the morning n switched off his cell in the evening when he reached there.I was worried so much that I cried a lot n then he mailed me saying he is going for ever n not going to come back n told me to marry according to my father's choice to a very rich and handsome boy.. I was totally devastated n don't know how to talk to him.. I sent so many mails to him pleading to come back n saying sorry . But he didn't mail 3 months.. that time was the worst of my life... every day I use to send 5/6 mails to him as I can't live without him.. n then I saw his Facebook profile on net which he has hidden from public view n also in a blog he wrote he is going to join ashram of some guruji.. n on 14 feb valentines day he mailed me saying he is having 80% blockage in heart n had 2 heart attacks within 10 days.. so he is going from my life n asked to marry somebody else.. I was totally broken down due to this and I told him I still love him n marry him.. but he said he is impotent also due to smoking.. still I agreed to marry him but he refused.n we didn't mail 2 months. N suddenly through net I found his address n phone number.. then I came to know 3 years back he gave me wrong address .I called him changing my voice first he said yes m speaking but when he heard my original voice he said I can't hear u n kept the phone.. I kept on calling but got busy..
I didn't knew what to do n cried because of his rude behaviour.. then next day he mailed saying he can't face me and married some one else... my world came to end as in these 5 years I always dreamt of him to be my husband n he also considered me as his wife though we never met but in our hearts.. I asked him the reason n he said some pandit told him as he is anshik manglik to marry a manglik girl n then all his problems will be solved.. his business problem his heart problem.. n said didn't want to spoil my life hence he did this as m very pretty and a good human so I can get any good boy..
on top of this all these 7 months I cried n prayed to god for bringing him back in my life as he was the only one who understood me cared for me n loved me so much..
he said he didn't love his wife n she is not of good character and not good looking n their thinking doesn't match as she is 8 yrs younger to him.. no 1 forced him to marry but he still did it n he married just for me as he knew I'll not marry until he marries n knew I love him a lot.. his sisters even told him that he is doing wrong to me as they knew about me.n said had sold his home to pay the loan n shifted to a rented flat n dats y not receiving my call on landline.. but we know no one sells home with his landline being there..
I know he is making me fool n he betrayed me very badly.. but I still can't get over him n thinks about him all the time.. the bad part is that he didn't even had the guts to talk to me directly n did all this just by mailing me n kept me in darkness about his marriage..
when I questioned him how did that girls parents married her to u even knowing you are going to die soon ? N all your problems r solved by marrying her? He didn't answer me.
the height is that he still says to me that no one can take my place n loves me still. When already someone else has taken that place? That means he is not loyal to either of us..
n asks me to marry someone else in every mail. I had stopped mailing him after knowing he is married.
after all this I don't think I can marry any one or trust any one.. I feel so depressed n doesn't feel like living anymore. I have no reason to live no 1 to live for.
n I don't want to do arrange marriage at all as I'll not even know the person well.
please someone guide me as I was very emotionally attached to him. What should I do?
den he told me smoked a lot when he was away for a year as he missed me a lot.. so he had some chest pain n feared he might have a heart problem. He went to doctor for echo n tmt tests which he said came normal.. but still took heart medicines.. n I cried a lot as I don't ever want to loose him.. then a year passed lik this.. n suddenly last year in October during diwaLI time he went home n on the first day itself we fought over some silly thing n he switched off his cell till evening n when he switched on told me that he is not suitable for me as he doesn't have a good job, is average looking n his family background is not nice as his father drinks n beats his mom since he was small.. n also his fourth sister n her daughter are living with his parents as her husband is of bad character..
so he didn't want to ruin my life n dats y want to break off.. but I cried n made him understand that I love him d most in this world n these things doesn't matter to me.. n then he somewhat became OK but the next 15 days his behaviour changed n he didn't use to talk to me much like before.. previously we used to share each n every little thing with each other.. n on the last day he was going to his new posting in delhi he talked to me in the morning n switched off his cell in the evening when he reached there.I was worried so much that I cried a lot n then he mailed me saying he is going for ever n not going to come back n told me to marry according to my father's choice to a very rich and handsome boy.. I was totally devastated n don't know how to talk to him.. I sent so many mails to him pleading to come back n saying sorry . But he didn't mail 3 months.. that time was the worst of my life... every day I use to send 5/6 mails to him as I can't live without him.. n then I saw his Facebook profile on net which he has hidden from public view n also in a blog he wrote he is going to join ashram of some guruji.. n on 14 feb valentines day he mailed me saying he is having 80% blockage in heart n had 2 heart attacks within 10 days.. so he is going from my life n asked to marry somebody else.. I was totally broken down due to this and I told him I still love him n marry him.. but he said he is impotent also due to smoking.. still I agreed to marry him but he refused.n we didn't mail 2 months. N suddenly through net I found his address n phone number.. then I came to know 3 years back he gave me wrong address .I called him changing my voice first he said yes m speaking but when he heard my original voice he said I can't hear u n kept the phone.. I kept on calling but got busy..
I didn't knew what to do n cried because of his rude behaviour.. then next day he mailed saying he can't face me and married some one else... my world came to end as in these 5 years I always dreamt of him to be my husband n he also considered me as his wife though we never met but in our hearts.. I asked him the reason n he said some pandit told him as he is anshik manglik to marry a manglik girl n then all his problems will be solved.. his business problem his heart problem.. n said didn't want to spoil my life hence he did this as m very pretty and a good human so I can get any good boy..
on top of this all these 7 months I cried n prayed to god for bringing him back in my life as he was the only one who understood me cared for me n loved me so much..
he said he didn't love his wife n she is not of good character and not good looking n their thinking doesn't match as she is 8 yrs younger to him.. no 1 forced him to marry but he still did it n he married just for me as he knew I'll not marry until he marries n knew I love him a lot.. his sisters even told him that he is doing wrong to me as they knew about me.n said had sold his home to pay the loan n shifted to a rented flat n dats y not receiving my call on landline.. but we know no one sells home with his landline being there..
I know he is making me fool n he betrayed me very badly.. but I still can't get over him n thinks about him all the time.. the bad part is that he didn't even had the guts to talk to me directly n did all this just by mailing me n kept me in darkness about his marriage..
when I questioned him how did that girls parents married her to u even knowing you are going to die soon ? N all your problems r solved by marrying her? He didn't answer me.
the height is that he still says to me that no one can take my place n loves me still. When already someone else has taken that place? That means he is not loyal to either of us..
n asks me to marry someone else in every mail. I had stopped mailing him after knowing he is married.
after all this I don't think I can marry any one or trust any one.. I feel so depressed n doesn't feel like living anymore. I have no reason to live no 1 to live for.
n I don't want to do arrange marriage at all as I'll not even know the person well.
please someone guide me as I was very emotionally attached to him. What should I do?