Hey guys!

First things first, I'm a 22 year old, fit, healthy male, and I do not have a porn addiction (only masturbate to porn 3 or 4 times a month). I have no issue getting an erection when I'm by myself, and generally get morning wood.

For as long as I can remember I've always found females attractive and I never had an interest in men. Up until a few years ago I would constantly get an erection just from a kiss, or any such contact with a woman. That was until sex came onto the table when I was 20. When there was just foreplay, but no chance of sex, I could still achieve an erection, but if we were in a place were sex was possible... no dice. Eventually I attained erection and lost my virginity, and since then I have had many further attempts, to the point that I have now had sex (if you could call it that) with 14 women. It has gotten progressively harder to achieve erection from any amount of contact with a woman, and whenever I have attained an erection, maintaining it is almost always impossible, so I have only climaxed with 3 women (first 3). After the continued fails during my last attempted relationship, I have given up on dating women for the timebeing, as I can't handle the embarrassment of it any more.

Over the past year and a bit I have had 2 incidents with men (who I have never found physically attractive), and my performance was only slightly better, though I was unable to maintain my erection. Throughout my youth I never had a gay thought, and even now when I walk down the beach its still the women that catch my eye. I haven't gone to a doctor because I know I can't be prescribed viagra if I can achieve erection on my own... so what should I do? Is it possible to be sexually gay, but mentally not be physically attracted to men? As in my penis be gay and my head be straight... Seems a bit off, no?
(I'm expecting some "you're a gay in denial" responses, but if that was the case I'd hardly have tried it out to check. I'll accept what I am... I just don't have a breeze what that is at the moment!)

What do you "desire" when you masturbate do you think of men or women,

There can be other mental issues about completion.

Have you had a complete physical? There are health issues that can cause what you are experiencing. For example, high blood pressure or diabetes.

I would start with a complete head to toe physical exam. Let the doctor know you are having these issues so that he/she can look for root health issues.

When I masturbate I think about women, though I have masturbated to gay porn just to see my reaction, but I learned nothing from that.

If it was a physical issue, surely I would have difficulty achieving erection by myself as well?

Its really getting to me now because I've denied myself relationships with women due to the possibility that it won't happen, and this is pushing me back into lonliness and hence depression. ( I forgot to mention I suffered depression last year, but my erectile dysfunction had been an issue long before that)