But she doesn't want to do anything about it. Like for example, they both agree(now, she didn't.before) it would be in best interest for the child. They've had no contact until a few years back, when my husband had to meet with her and the c/s office her to have the c/s lowered because his income decreased. Then that's when she started mentioning... well you could buy him something for school. My husband, agreed, simply asking OK what?. then the emails stopped... never did she reply again. Then just when we thought our lives were coming together, my huband, our two children, finally gour first used car, six months later, we move out. Our first place. My husbands still paying cs. Gets another job, because cs hadn't fixed the order and was taking half his check. Then I'm laid off, then so is he. Down to one income for a soon to be family of five. Then an email pops up, the ex read a post from my hubbands myspace, reading "on break at work missing my wife n kids their my world" well her email say so sad uour wife and kids are more important than MY SON.. . And more emails being very childish... well eventually my husband is laid off again.so no income,our car is repoed... Now almost three years later, we just found employment. Just starting back up. Well this past November the ex sends an email saying, you haven't paid child support my son doesn't know you exist, he has a.daddy, just sign uour rights away, you won't ever have to deal with us again. She also states that I'm the one stopping him from seeing their son. I don't get that part. My husband is great with our kids. She just has had an easier life than us. And just doenst care to try and understand that this wasn't done on purposed.we didn't even read that email tntil two months later, no internet. So when he responded, she ignored it. But my husband knows trying now would just confuse the child, so he sent an email saying he would when we could afford a lawyer... well fact of the matter we can't. He called some layers all want a retainer of five grand. So instead of her husband filing the adoption papers, like my husband asked she rather not. My husband found a website that will file the adoption for less than 400 dollars, but it hast to be done by her husband... not going to happen, even if my husband paid for it. She gets joy knowing she is keeping US in debt. Because US, not just him, we're legally married, I inherited his back cs too. Oh and any credit given to our children for income tax is taken away from them and given to her. Bottom line she's fine and dandy when my husband is paying cs and stays away and she says she doesn't want or need it... it feels like she has control over our lives and any little bit off money we have. What are we supposed to do? Its not like we're lying about not having money. Lets do some comparing, they own their home, we rent a 2bdrm apt. They own 3 vehicles all custom, we don't own or lease a vehicle. We have one TV from like the 80s , but its ours,one bed, one toddler bed, and a couch. Not much, but its enough. We've tried to explain to her that we also have a special needs child, who has autism, is deaf, and mute,still she doesn't care. She even sent in an email "childish or not I know I'm better than both of you" what that even mean? I just don't know how much more of her crap we can tolerate. We tried doing things the right way, and it didn't work. How can he give her his rights to where she won't have any more contact with us? Sorry so long, wanted the whole out there mayb someone will understand... and help us please... In Texas

First, he cannot just sign his rights away. IF her new husband decides to adopt, then he can agree. Otherwise there is nothing he can do about it.

What he can do is keep working with the court to reduce his support obligation. He can also increase his exemptions on his W4 to reduce his withholding so he doesn't get a big refund.

If he is supposed to have visitation rights and she blocks them he can go to court to enforce them. He may even have a case of parental alienation. But neither will affect his support obligation.

The child support stopping isn't our problem. Its her. She says stay away... Then its like how can you forget about my son. We're fine with him paying for the child. I just don't get why she can play these mind games with us and its all fine. We at the point where its like shut up already! we don't have time for her crap butdoesnt look it will ever end... it sucks cause me and my kids are caught in the middle... nothing we be done... im literally at the verge of having a mental breakdown... oh and he doesn't call a medation cause, the cs officers are asses, they listen her and just give him crap and speak with him extremely rude... the whole system is crap. How can we have contact with her come to a complete stop? Like take the money and shut up... and we'll stay away too...

First you and he stop worrying about what she wants or says, who cares, she is a ex, let her go mutter all day.

He needs in court if he does not have it, a child visitation order, he needs to go and visit his kids and have a relationship with them. With a court order she has to allow the visits. Bring the kids for weekend to your home.

Next if the child support should not be 1/2 of his pay unless he is paying back support with that, and if he loses his job, or if his pay is less you go back to COURT and have it reduced.

If you don't want to talk to her, don't, don't answer the phone if she calls, don't open her texts or emails. BUT if you and he have kids, is that how you want him to be with your kids ?
He should want to have a relationship with them.

But she can not force it, so he changes his phone number, never talks to her just sends his check each week, that is all she can force him to do.

To chuck... Thank you for your insight. Ur right let her run her mouth. And NO I wouldn't want him to be that way with OUR kiddos... he wants to establish a relationship with him, but feels as, if he would come into his life now it might ruined the father child relationship he has with his step father, cause he really believes that her husband is daddy. But lets say he does inforce visitation, she says she will do anything and everything to keep my husband away, so HER son doesn't get hurt... basically saying, just pay child support, that I don't need or wanPppppppt, stay away... it sucks cause we're damned if we do and damned if we don't

Yes it does suck, but there is nothing you can do about it. Either he fights for a relationship or he lets it go. He can try writing a letter to an attorney to be given him when he turns 18 explaining why he felt he shouldn't intervene in his relation with his step father. And suggesting that, if he wants to contact him and his half siblings now, it would be welcomed.