I have been with my boyfriend for what will be a year on June 21, 2012 we talked for 6 months we made it official that I was his girlfriend on Christmas. He and I have had a lot of trust issues in the past because we have both been hurt by our ex's. I personally have told him more about my past relationship than he has told me.

We have had a couple problems. He told me he doesn't want to get too attached to me because of the fact he wants secure future money wise and I don't have money saved up yet because I have a lot of bills. He also told me he was getting bored sexually so I have been trying to spice it up. But I told him a couple weeks ago that I was madly in love with him and he's all I wanted in my life. But when I told him I loved him he said to me "I'm sorry but I don't feel the same way yet and don't know when I will".

So I did what I thought would be best I tried to end it and his response was "R U serious?” I told him my reasoning and he said "Idk know when I will feel that way but you ending it would be a dumb decision". I just don't get it I need advice!! PLEASEEE!! :(

It seems to me you were right to end it. He was being a jerk.

Some advice; you never know how much you love something until it's gone. So break up with him and play hard to get. Maybe that will make him wise up and realise how much he cares about you.

And if he doesn't then you know he's lost something great in his life and you can move on and hopefully find the perfect guy.

Hope this helps, good luck.

Just end it. You did the right thing ;)

You don't have to be in love to have sex, or be comfortable, but what he wants has nothing to do with what you want, so dump him, and let him get sex and comfort somewhere else. At least he was honest.

I didn't end it that time.. well I did but then I took him back like 5 minutes later... how can I just leave someone that I have loved since the moment I saw him, before I even knew his name or age I knew I loved him. How do I just walk away... it will be a year June 21, 2012... and I hopeing he will tell me he loves me... I don't know if I'm getting my hopes up or if I'm thinking like an immature teenager.. but I don't know I can picture my whole life with him... so again how do I walk away...

The thing I don't get is he says he doesn't love me but yet he asked me if I ever wanted to have kids and we talked about getting married.. not marrying each other but in general.. and like if I would to say I wanted something in a house he would either say that he agreed with me or that he didn't... if he doesn't love me then why even mention all of those things.. and also he said he can't have a future with someone who doesn't have money saved up... I don't have money saved up and he is always telling me to save money and he is helping me save money so I don't get it... if he doesn't love me then why even care if I save money or not.. and also he told me he couldn't spend his life with someone who didn't go to college.. and I am... but ughhh I don't know... he makes no sense!!

As was stated before , be glad he is being honest with you instead of stringing you along telling you he loves you when in fact he does not.

Talking about marriage and children and houses is common conversation among friends and is not a show of intention or affection necessarily.
You may have looked at it as such because of your feelings for him you would maybe assume it to be more than it was.

It is a sad and painful situation to love and not have it returned. You have invested 11 months when many in the same situation may have many years invested then discover the sad truth.

I know love cannot be turned off or on like a switch and you cannot just stop loving him and wait to see if he eventually falls for you.

I suggest you end this and stop torturing yourself over a relationship that is not what you want a relationship to be .

Stop contact and take time to heal . It will not be easy and will only get harder the longer you put off facing the reality of your situation.

Your confusion comes from your feelings, in love, but rejected,


But when I told him I loved him he said to me "I'm sorry but I don't feel the same way yet and don't know when I will".

So your high hopes of forever has been dashed by doubts now, which makes all that you have, hopes and dreams of forever, in jeopardy. That's a lot of fear causing confusion to deal with. That always happens when you put someone on a pedestal, and wrap your world around them, then they do not give you, what you have given them. Your heart.

In times like this, dominated by fear and confusion, you step back to a safe emotional distance, and protect yourself.

But when I told him I loved him he said to me "I'm sorry but I don't feel the same way yet and don't know when I will".

I just don't get it I need advice!!! PLEASEEE !!! :(

He has told you how he feels, He does not love you. And he does not seem like a very caring person. If he really cared he'd tell you that he knows what you want but he cannot give it.
You need to not waste anymore time on him. I know it's hard but you need to walk away.

Well I decided to take things into my own hands without advice... I personally still have trust issues with him in the girl department so I decided to make a fake myyearbook page and I messaged him obviously pretending to be the other girl and he was saying "i wish you had a body shot pic" and "you're sexy" so I am COMPLETELY done... 11 months of my life are down the drain... AWESOMEEEEEE :'( NOT my heart is broken

You knew this was coming, now that it has, mourn your loss.

I think he is a selfish who is only concerning about himself. If he never ever be ready for you, then why he does want to commit the relationship? Please do not go into a relationship whereby the guy is not serious and never know that he loves you or not. If he not confirming now, then when will he confirmed? 10 years or 20 years? By then, will you still awaiting for him and lost all the opportunities that you might have. And get someone that deserve you better than he is. He is just a loser who would like to turn you as his spare tyres until he found somebody that he loves and dump you. That would be the end of the relationship 1 day. So you should know what to do while you're dignity is still there.