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View Full Version : I hate my life


mino_slope
May 10, 2012, 12:53 PM
When I Was 7 years old my mam and dad got Divorced but after a few months they came back to each others , my mam used to Hit me really hard when ever I did any thing wrong , always shout at me and tell me that I am a loser , it was really disappointing that I hated her , Then when I was 9 my mam asked for Divorce again , they refused to tell me why but they used to fight all the time , My mam left Home and never came back and didn't leave a phone number or an address , her mobile is closed until this day and I don't know where she is , after some research I found out that my dad was cheating on my mam with a 24 or a 25 years old girl , I confronted him with it and he kept beating me until my left arm got broken , had 2 surgeries in it , after I healed he started to treat me really bad , always hit me for no reason at all , always telling me that I am a looser and that he's ashamed of me being his son , like one of the times I finished dinner , he asked me why I didn't say thanks for him making it to me and he kept on hitting me , other time I just finished my home works and went to sleep I was really tired , he woke me up and told me that's the only thing you do in your life you keep sleaping and don't study and he kept hitting me , after it the girl he was having an affair with started to come home and stay for the night to sleep with him , then she began to stay with us for a few days , then weeks , I complained about it and he hit me again , one time he told me to get out of the house so that they can spend some time together , when I said no he literately pushed me out of the house , I stayed in the streats intil it was 1 am and then I decided to go back , when I went back he asked me why I was late , and then again he hit me , when ever that girl doesn't like something I do she tell's my dad to do something about it and he hits me , I began to spend the entire day with my friends and away from home . Used to wonder in the streets for hours after school to avoid going back home , and when he asked me I told him studying with friends , then I got a girl friend , she was the only person who cared about me in the world , had no one to talk to before and always kept all of the sadness inside me , she loved me and supported me always no matter what and was always there for me when I needed her and I did the same for her and loved her much more than she loved me , for the first time in long years I could finally trust some one and get loved , after a year and a half I was with my friends in the park . I saw her kissing another guy . I took my freind's skate board and kept beating the guy . They had to push me back because I almost killed him . That night I didn't go back home . Was so frustrated , why go back to home to get hit by my dad , I stayed at my friends house for 3 days and then I went back home . I knew he would beat me to death but I really didn't give the any more , the moment I got in he slapped me and kept hitting me , my entire body turned to blue and she just kept watching , for the last 3 months my girl friend has been calling me and asking for forgivnes and I really didn't care any more . I had the idea of killing myself a few times but I got over it . I really need help . But I don't think can go to a therapist because of my dad of course ,

mino_slope
May 10, 2012, 02:35 PM
Yah I kind of expected that no one can help in such a situation

Darkangelxx
May 10, 2012, 06:26 PM
No , I'm in the situation only its my mom who does the hitting my dad left me and its her boyfriend also I get made fun of in every relationship I've ever had I've been cheatwd on the only reason I haven't killed myself yet is bcs my brothers and friends its my jon to protect my brothers, so all I say is think posotive think of your friend who care about you and do whatever you can to stay out of the house or get help

Darkangelxx
May 10, 2012, 06:33 PM
N no a therapist I don't tink well help all that much

Chardel
May 10, 2012, 07:15 PM
How old are you now? Are you in school? Is there an older person you trust that you can talk to about this?. I realize that if you talk to the wrong person that things could go from bad to worse for you, but this has to stop. You have already demonstrated that you have anger issues, and rightfully so, but beating another person is not the answer, for anyone. I have a five year rule that I live by, or try to anyway... The rule is that if something is going to affect my life five years form now then deal with it, if it's not then let it go. You have to deal with your family problem and your own anger... Therapy will only work if you want it to. You have already passed the biggest hurdle, talking about it and recognizing that this is a bigger problem than you can handle on your own. No one wants to see you hurt any more than you already have been, no one wants to see you on the run from this situation either. Wandering the streets is not a good thing. Try to find someone who you can trust to talk to and help you get out of this in a safe way.

Darkangelxx
May 10, 2012, 07:27 PM
Yeah but chardel talking about it dsnt always help, and.some therapists will tell your parents or try to help you which makes them want to beat you more and no one needs that

Chardel
May 10, 2012, 07:35 PM
That's what I meant when I said that things could go from bad to worse for you... There is no problem to great to be solved, so you are right that talking doesn't always help all the time but you only need for it to work this one time right now. Who ever you pick to talk to needs to understand that if what you say gets back to your dad then life will be soooo much worse for you. That person needs to help you get out of this situation with no chance of any fall back to you, this person also needs to help you get your anger out and under control.
You have not said how old you are. Depending on where you live and how old you are there are agencies that will help you too.

Fr_Chuck
May 10, 2012, 07:37 PM
You get the police involved and CPS and get removed into foster care.

Darkangelxx
May 10, 2012, 07:58 PM
But just like I.said I'm in the same situation as you and I.can't go tell nobody bcs of fear tneyll just beat me to death so think of the peeple who DO love you and care about you try to get help from pple who wnt go to your dad and badge him beat you more do quartet you can to stay alive

mino_slope
May 11, 2012, 07:44 AM
I am 15 years old now , I am in Grade 9 , no I don't have any one that I fully trust , my grand mother and grand father live really far from us , 3 hours driving by car to get to them

Darkangelxx
May 11, 2012, 01:17 PM
Wow it only one year than me and maybe you cld try to contact then without your dad finding out what your trying to do, and I'm in the same situation I have nobody completely no relatives at all,but like I've been saying try to do whatever you can to not see your dad so he wnt beat you even more