OK, I'm a 24 year old male. I only had one real girlfriend in high school and we went out from the beginning of our junior year (fall of '03), and broke up in October of 2005. We had a really good relationship, we were inseparable, and felt that we were both more mature and "above" all the high school BS, so we connected extremely well. We lost our virginity to each other, had actually a really great sex life, better than either of us have had with anyone else (she even confirms this), my parents loved her and hers loved me... it was Lifetime Movie quality, haha. So anyway, we broke up after college because we were 5 hours apart, too busy, missing the college experience, etc. etc. I never stopped comparing other girls I dated to her, and ran into her every once in a while.

So, in January, I ran into her at a bar. She looked amazing, even better than in high school, and then we chatted, talked on Facebook, and a few weeks later I asked her if she would be open to ONE actual real date, just to catch up and have a nice meal. She agreed, and we've again been inseparable. We have both grown up a lot, and it seems that the feeling is there as it always has been.

My concern is that we're living on the past and not really having a relationship based in the "here and now". I want to ask her to move in with me, and I think she'll say yes... but I'm not sure what to do. I actually could see us married someday. She even hinted at it. It feels like we never broke up, but the sex is better, we don't have parents around to worry about, we're mature, we have jobs, and we're done with the college thing.

On one hand, I think deep down, she's always been "the one". On the other hand, I hear horror stories about reconnecting with old exes.

I think one thing in our favor is our breakup wasn't messy, and neither of us ever cheated, abused, etc... it was more a situational thing.

Anyone got some suggestions?

I should say we broke up after we started college as in October of our freshman year... I just reread my post.

Since you aren't sure, give it more time before going to the step of moving in together. That would involve a much higher level of commitment as well as a change in financial and physical logistics.

Maybe talk about new things that you would like to try. You could take turns setting up a date around the new activities you each want to do. That can bring things more into the present. Perhaps plan a trip somewhere together. That moves you to future plans as well.

If you haven't already been discussing where you both see the relationship heading or just what the level of commitment is right now, that might be a place to start. Definitely beneficial if you are both on the same page. You may be thinking of the possibility of long term while she may just be enjoying the here and now at the moment.

I would say don't get to far ahead of yourself and just enjoy it and see where it leads. Talk out your questions and concerns but just enjoy it for now. Plenty of time for the heavy stuff later.

Follow heart. If you want her to move-in with you, I guess that's just right. Tell her. You will know the real her if you live at the same roof. Taking your relationship a little more serious is not that bad.

The past is the past-take every day as it comes and don't rush things.
Live life, don't over analyze it.

Well, a bit of an update...

Last night, I did take one step and told her that I loved her. She said "I love you too" and as we talked, she said deep down, she has always loved me and never stopped.

So that's a good sign. My idea was to plan a weekend trip somewhere and see how that goes.

Enjoy... hope you have a great time!. :)

So, spontaneously, I booked a trip THIS WEEKEND in a mountain cabin that I rented.

I was a bit nervous that she'd be busy, but I knew I could still get a refund so I figured what the hell.

I'm picking her up at 7. She was ecstatic about it! I think the spontaneity scored a few points.

Morning people... thanks for all the advice. We had a great time, and, although most of it was spent in the bedroom... haha... we talked a lot. We had a lot of discussions about things we want to do in the future together.

We did finally have the "where do you see us going" talk on the drive back (it's 3 and a half hours from where we live) Sunday night. We basically agreed that we do see marriage in the future, but want to wait until the euphoria of a "new" relationship dies down first before I buy a ring.

However, we did decide to move in together, once her lease is up at the end of May.

Move things slowly, go with the flow. If this get better and you feel comfortable to live with her then you can ask her, for the time being let things fall into place.

Good morning everyone.

I haven't been here since I posted this over 2 years ago. I was cleaning out my email inbox and found this thread.

I wanted to update everyone - we eloped last Saturday. I proposed to her in June, and after some initial wedding planning, we both agreed that the best thing for us was just to do it and get married.

We still have a great relationship. We're best friends, lovers, and both ridiculously comfortable around each other (in ways that would gross out some couples) and still have a fantastic sex life, too.

So sometimes, rekindling an old flame can work out!

Very glad you updated us with the great news and congratulations. I love it when a plan works out well.

Thanks and continued good life.

Congrats. Finding that one special person as both of you have is awesome.

Thank you for sharing your great news! Wishing you many happy years together.

So nice to hear the good news. Many blessings to y'all and may you have a long, happy life together!