Well here goes. My girlfriend and I got a little kitten from our humane society last year. He was the perfect crazy little playful kitten and loved me dearly and my girlfriend. Well about 3 months ago he sort of stopped coming around me. And being so playful when I was around. Then he got to hiding under our couch for as long as I was in room or near. But he was able to be coaxed out with toys and would play with us but was still cautious. Now really bad this month he is terrified of me. He hides constantly. If I try and pet him he hisses and hunkers to the floor and cries. Now this week he has started panicking when alone in house with me. He pees a really strong smelling urine and makes bowl movements that I never knew a cat could make.. I'm referring to the size. And just lays by them. I tell him no sternly and place him in basement by litter box. Now when I'm at work or not home he's the same old hyper playful cat with my girlfriend. And as soon as I open door she says he panics and hides in nearest spot. I love him so much and miss cuddling and playing with him. I do know in the past he has injured himself when we moved his litter box to basement and was learning the stairs and I found him under them with a bloody nose I'm assuming he fell through them. And the other time I was on the elliptical exercising and he must have came up behind it because I heard him cry and saw him laying behind it crying. Both times I doctored him by cleaning him up and holding him till he purred and was happy again. Could that have anything to do with it. Also I am a big guy at 280 pounds. And I walk heavy could that be a problem. Finally he does need neutered also... sorry for the 4 page essay. But just want to figure out what's wrong with my buddy.

Thanks. Steve Schwartz

Your cat is scared of you - that is certain. You may be scaring him if your tone of voice is angry - or if you are really getting angry with him because of something. Cats can sense how we are feeling and if you are angry he may be reacting to your anger and feel it is not safe. Cats can do stuff we don't like - so be sure to say something like "no, baby, no" and then when things are OK be sure to talk to him and let him know you love him - like you would with a baby. (I know that may sound crazy to some people but pet parents know this works). When one of my cats has been scared - I just need to pet them and say something like "it's ok, it's ok, sweetheart" and they will respond to your kindness. He will understand.

I know one time I got angry with one of my cats (that lived to be 20 years old and was a beautiful cat) - and my tone of voice was angry and I scolded him - and then he started crying and crying - like I had really hurt his feelings - and I felt so bad. I immediately got down on one knee and called to him and picked him up and said I'm sorry and kissed him and held him. That re-assured him - and me - that all was OK. Sometimes we don't know ourselves when we get angry so be extra gentle. Sometimes you may have to say no a few times before your pets will understand. So long as you re-assure him and talk with him.

The other thing I wanted to mention is - if he gets hurt - seek medical care. Find a local vet that you can afford and trust and get help for him. The bloody nose you mention is scary and he may have been badly hurt.