schnookums
Mar 29, 2012, 09:00 PM
I've been in and out of depressions for the last 18 yrs, and never once, even when I asked for help, did I ever receive it.I kept being told to snap out of it, that others were in a worst shape than me, and to just "suck it up buttercup"...
Thoughts of suicide... are an hourly thing, actually attempted twice, and failed. OVer the last few months , those feeling of worthlessness are creeping up again, and to make matters worst my husband is clinically depressed. He wants me to help him, but I don't know how. Any suggestion?
Illusion
Mar 30, 2012, 12:37 AM
A couple of things come to mind. Whoever was giving you advice was not very understanding of you. To tell someone to "suck it up" when you feel upset - is just not right. If you feel hurt and you are told to ignore that and to think of how much suffering there is for other people - then yes, I can see why you would continue to feel upset. Your feelings are important. You deserve better than being told that your feelings don't count. Of course you count- and your feelings count. You may be unhappy because of things that have happened that have left you feeling disappointed and hurt - and then not knowing how to express all that hurt and sadness - you turn on yourself because you never had the support that you needed. Sometimes it happens that a parent does not know how to respond and comfort their child - and so we are left in limbo - not knowing how to comfort ourselves. We never learned that in childhood - so as adults we suffer because we do not how to comfort ourselves. The first thing to know is that you are not hopeless. There are solutions. Suicide becomes an option because you just want the emotional pain to stop and you feel you are hopeless. You are not hopeless - you are a person and there are solutions. Suicide is not the answer. Another issue with depression is the need to know that you are primarily a spirit and that no matter what has happened in the past - there will always be a part of you that will always be whole and complete - right here and right now. You are more than any problem you may encounter in this life and you deserve to have a good life. Why not? Other people do - why not you? Feelings of worthlessness have no need to "creep up" when you know that you as a spirit move forward in courage and trust that the universe will help you in all you need.
I would suggest that you do go to counseling to learn new coping skills to address the sadness and depression.
talaniman
Mar 30, 2012, 06:50 AM
You both should see a good physician to get the help you need by someone that knows how to help.