I'm 14 and I'm 5 months pregnant I'm having a little boy my parents say they are going to make me get an abortion but I don't want to. My boyfriends mom says I can move in and she will support us, my parents won't let me what can I do.

Where? What happens next depends on where you live.

Your parents cannot drag you to an abortion clinic and force you to have an abortion. That's against the law.

How old is your boyfriend?

The parents can not force an abortion or an adoption of their minor. If you tell us a little more about you, we can advise what to do next.

Yes, your parents can't force you to have an abortion or give the child up for adoption. However, since you are a minor you can't move out without their permission. Your boyfriend's mother was out of line by offering to let you move in. Your parents could sue her for parental interference.

Sorry, but you are caught between a rock and a hard place. You are too young to move out, but your child is under your control. I would urge you to reconsider abortion and especially adoption. Your child will suffer in the circumstances surrounding his birth. Better to give him up to a family that will not only love him but be able to give him a home life you will not be able to do.

I'm 14 and I'm 5 months pregnant

Just want to point out that at 5 months, abortion is likely no longer an option, no matter what the OP or her parents want.

Most doctors won't perform an abortion after the first trimester. The OP is nearly at her third trimester. It's entirely possible that this fetus could survive outside the womb if it were to be delivered at this stage of pregnancy.

Just want to point out that at 5 months, abortion is likely no longer an option,

Good point I missed that.

Good point I missed that.

I guess we can agree that this baby is going to be born, no matter what the OP's parents want.

So, with that consideration, what are her options?

Abortion is out. Adoption is still in, but only if that's what she decides. Either way, there's going to be a baby.

I'm not a legal expert, but, if the mother of the OP's boyfriend, the father of this child, is willing to take her in, how can she go about that? It's obvious that the OP's parents want her to do something that's not only not viable, but extremely risky, and frankly, illegal. This is not longer an embryo, it's a fetus that could, albeit with extreme hardship, survive outside the womb.

This baby is coming, it's closer to being here as it is to being just a possibility.

Yes, the OP is only 14, a child. She shouldn't be having a child of her own, and I completely understand where her parents are coming from. But they can't force her to put this child up for adoption, and abortion is no longer an option. So then what?

The OP's parents need to be aware of the legal complications they are involved in, They have a choice here. They can either support their daughter and their grandchild or they can turn her out. If they decide to support her they are in good shape. If they decide to go the other way, they can agree to let her move in with the father's family. However, if they just kick her out they can be in trouble. So its support her or let her go with the father's family.

They may have another choice about prosecuting the father. But if they do that it wouldn't be smart to let her move in with the father's family.

This is a sad situation and should be a warning to teens who decide to become sexually active.

It is very possible that she first told her parents and they are, as all parents do at this point they are over reacting. More info will be needed for the follow-up..

But as noted abortion is not really a option here, adoption could be. Also jail or prison for the boy, since at many places 14 is underage and depending on the age of the boy what may happen to him.

So I guess you and his mom can visit him in prison.

I looked it up before I posted - you can get an abortion at 5 months in some States/places. That's why I asked where she is.

He is fifteen ill be fifteen Monday, they won't even let us see each other for 3 months, its bothering me I want him there when mason is born, I'm not giving my baby up I'm the one who got pregnant and no one can say that I can't take care of this baby because I've raised myslef since iwas ten along with my three yr old sis and my 2 month old brotger, I need to find a way to get out I heard I could take them for court, we both have our workers perment and we are both working. Im already attached to mason.

Im on springdale Arkansas by the way that might help

And again - where? You've been self supporting since you were 10? That's going to be the question if it comes to an argument.

Well parents were n and out of our lives, springdale ar

In Arkansas you cannot have an abortion past 13 weeks of pregnancy, so you are safe there.

You say you have raised yourself and some siblings. Who gave you the money to do so?

Ive been working for almost a year now, my brother is 20 now and was helping until he moved out a year ago, its been me all by myslef now.

I realize that you may have raised yourself, but, I think you're mixing up what's actually involved when raising a child.

You may have dressed yourself, made yourself something to eat, got yourself to school. But I doubt that you paid the mortgage or rent on the house you lived in. I doubt you paid for the food you ate, or your medical bills, etc. etc. since you were 10.

You may very well be ready to take care of a child, but are you ready to support a child on your own? Do you have any idea how much it costs to raise a child? The birth alone will cost around $12,000, and that's only if there no complications, which is unlikely given your age. After that there's formula, clothes, diapers, doctor visits, etc. etc. and you still have to provide a roof over his head.

I have yet to meet a 14 year old that can earn enough money to take care of all of these expenses.

Fact is, you're going to need an adult to help you with this, and it doesn't sound like your parents are willing to do that.

Have you really thought this through? A baby isn't a doll. He won't do what you want when you want him to do it. This is a 24 hour a day job, every day of the week. You can't just decide that you're tired, or not in the mood. Once you're a parent you're in it for life, and it's a job that people twice your age aren't prepared to take on, and they have the money to do it.

I understand that and with both of us working I'm sure we coild do it along with his familys help, I have people to help and I already have a lot of diapers and clothes and all of that just need to get formula. That's it, I already hve most of it different sizes of diapers up to threes.

Since you are keeping your baby, ask a school counselor, your doctor, health department, your boyfriend's parents, or another trusted adult to guide you in getting assistance. Here is a very good place to start:

Healthy Start (http://www.mcaeoc.com/html/healthy_start.html)

We have told you what the law is. That won't change. But, if your home life is as you have said, then you might want contact your local Family Services agency.

Also he is guilty of sexual misconduct under Arkansas law:
Sexual Misconduct - Section 5-14-107 (a) A person commits sexual misconduct if he engages in sexual intercourse or deviate sexual activity with another person not his spouse who is less than sixteen (16) years old.
(b) Sexual misconduct is a Class B misdemeanor.

It is sounding like you planned this pregnancy in the hopes that it would help you get out of the house. If so that was a foolish, immature thing to do. It may be one thing to watch a baby brother, change diapers, feed etc. But caring for a newborn full time is very different. Plus you have no clue how much it will cost to care for the child. As a 15 yr old you can't earn close to enough money, even the two of you (assuming he doesn't go to jail).

How would he be guilty when there is only about a year between us

I understand that and with both of us working im sure we coild do it along with his familys help, i have people to help and i already have a lot of diapers and clothes and all of that just need to get formula. Thats it, i already hve most of it different sizes of diapers up to threes.

I still don't think you get it. When my son was born I had to go to the store every second day for diapers. Luckily I breastfed, so I didn't have to buy the very expensive formula.

You may have things already, but those things won't last long. Diapers, formula, and clothes, well, you'll be buying every single week. Formula alone will cost you hundreds of dollars every month, diapers too.

What about the delivery? Do you have the $12,000 plus to deliver your baby? Do you have the $250 per doctors visit that you'll have to pay when the baby is born? What if there are complications? Mothers your age usually have complications when they give birth, that's why people preach about teen pregnancy. Your body is not ready to have a child, and that can cause major issues. What if you or the baby has to spend an extended period in the hospital?

Unless you have a job where you're making over $50,000 a year, just you, you won't be able to afford this baby, even then it will be tough. Forget about the bf's income. Soon you'll be doing this on your own, because the chances of you two staying together, well, the odds aren't good. You'd have a better chance winning the lottery.

I hate to be the voice of reason, especially since I'm sure you won't listen, or you won't accept that what I'm saying is true. But, your fantasy baby, well, the reality isn't nearly as easy as you seem to think it will be. This is going to be the hardest thing you ever do. My main concern is the baby, because the baby deserves the best, and at 14, you really can't provide that.

Just my opinion.

How would he be guilty when there is only about a year between us

Did you read the law I posted. He can defend against a rape charge based on a close in age exemption. But that doesn't apply to the Sexual Misconduct charge. If charges are brought against him he will have a criminal record, which won't help his ability to earn money.

15 year olds just don't get it. I recently delivered a baby to a 15 year old girl. She laid in the bed texting her friends as I was doing full blown CPR to her baby that was born dead. Yes, I said DEAD. She believed that all babies were born this way and that we did CPR to all babies.

Her family pulled the plug on that baby yesterday, and we said goodbye to a beautiful little 6 pound angel.

They think that an $8 an hour part time job will be enough money to get them through. They are sadly mistaken. It's a shame girls this young believe they can keep their babies and give them a good life because they can't.

Apparently when you're 14 and pregnant you know everything.

How sad for the child about to be born.

15 year olds just don't get it. I recently delivered a baby to a 15 year old girl. She laid in the bed texting her friends as I was doing full blown CPR to her baby that was born dead. Yes, I said DEAD. She believed that all babies were born this way and that we did CPR to all babies.

Her family pulled the plug on that baby yesterday, and we said goodbye to a beautiful little 6 pound angel.

They think that an $8 an hour part time job will be enough money to get them through. They are sadly mistaken. It's a shame girls this young believe they can keep their babies and give them a good life because they can't.

Im sorry for your loss. Not many know how to measure the commitment of the nurses in the night as they come and go to watch those that can not watch after themselves.

Im sorry for your loss. Not many know how to measure the commitment of the nurses in the night as they come and go to watch those that can not watch after themselves.

Thank you Cali. But my point was that these are children we are talking about her. They don't understand that things can, and do go wrong. They are not fully aware of how much time, dedication and money it takes to raise a child.

They are still children themselves and have no real knowledge of what it takes to raise a child whether the child is healthy or has special needs.

This is why 4-H Club was so popular when I was in my early teens. Raising a calf or foal (or puppy) and taking it to the county fair for judging took a lot of time and energy, so that youngsters weren't at all interested in having human babies. And my mom had her last one when I was 16, so helping care for my little brother killed any "baby hunger" I had.

Im sorry for your loss. Not many know how to measure the commitment of the nurses in the night as they come and go to watch those that can not watch after themselves.


This is off topic and will probably get pulled BUT I don't get much of a chance to say "thanks" to Nurses everywhere. I've posted this before - it was the Nurses who made the difference when my late husband was so ill. They answered questions and cared for him and cared about him and propped me up on more than one occasion.

The Doctors wore their expensive shoes and drifted in and out, looking vague and troubled.

It's the Nurses who kept that hospital going - and I think it's probably like that everywhere!

So - thanks to J9 and all of the Nurses out there who are like her.

This is off topic and will probably get pulled BUT I don't get much of a chance to say "thanks" to Nurses everywhere. I've posted this before - it was the Nurses who made the difference when my late husband was so ill. They answered questions and cared for him and cared about him and propped me up on more than one occasion.

The Doctors wore their expensive shoes and drifted in and out, looking vague and troubled.

It's the Nurses who kept that hospital going - and I think it's probably like that everywhere!

So - thanks to J9 and all of the Nurses out there who are like her.

It won't get pulled if I have anything to do with it Judy. Thank you for your thanks, but that is just what we do, we don't expect thanks or gratitude, we do this because it is our passion to help others just as I am trying to help this girl.

She doesn't realize the time and expense that a baby is going to bring. She may have "raised" herself or some siblings, but that is a totally different animal than raising a newborn. It's like comparing apples to oranges.

While I commend her for wanting to take responsibility for her predicament, it is not in the best interest of the baby at hand.

I just want to tell the OP that I became pregnant with my first child at 19 years old, with a boy I had dated for 3 years. Even at 19, and a high school degree, this was terribly difficult. Even with our parents support and both of us working. We got married so our insurance would be better, and because we thought the baby would make our love grow. We struggled with bills, we struggled with having enough to eat, and because we could not afford daycare, worked opposite shifts. This meant that one of us was always alone with the baby for 1/2 of the day, and working for the other 1/2. To top it off, our son suffered with Reflux and GERD and also had a hernia. He screamed for 2-3 hours straight each night, even with medicine and then threw up for the rest of the time. Eventually we had to have surgery to repair his hernia. Our medical bills were through the roof. We never went out, we never ate out, we didn't have cable tvs or cell phones, we used the internet at the library, our friends moved on and did their own things. Years later,when our first son was 7, we divorced, because we realized that we weren't those 19 year old kids anymore, we were nothing alike, and we were never going to make something work that never should've worked to begin with. I don't regret my son, and even though I have risen up and finished college and bettered myself, it was the hardest struggle I have ever had. I am 29 now, and JUST NOW are things starting to ease up for me. I just wanted you to know that things never go like you think they will, and since you're under 18 things will be harder. The chances of you and your boyfriend remaining together are slim (not saying you won't, just saying the odds are against you) Just make sure you think things through well. Good luck to you

Excuse me but I myself are fourteen and pregnant and have decided to keep this child. I fully understand that I will never have the life 'every teenager' apparently dreams of. Though I will be happy knowing that I have created a new life. I also know that having to raise a child isn't no luxury. Not every underage pregnant girl is that foolish. Don't judge everyone on one idiots mistake.

Excuse me but I myself are fourteen and pregnant and have decided to keep this child. I fully understand that i will never have the life 'every teenager' apparently dreams of. Though i will be happy knowing that i have created a new life. I also know that having to raise a child aint no luxury. Not every underage pregnant girl is that foolish. Dont judge everyone on one idiots mistake.


How are you intending to support this child? Good that you are happy to create a new life. Which foolish idiot are you referencing?

Excuse me but I myself are fourteen and pregnant and have decided to keep this child. I fully understand that i will never have the life 'every teenager' apparently dreams of. Though i will be happy knowing that i have created a new life. I also know that having to raise a child aint no luxury. Not every underage pregnant girl is that foolish. Dont judge everyone on one idiots mistake.

I'm sorry, but I have to ask, how are you going to raise this child? Where I live the only place you're old enough to work at is McDonalds. So how are you going to support this child? By support I mean putting a roof over it's head, food on the table, clothes on it's back, doctor visits, etc. etc. etc. Doubt you can afford that even if you do get a job at McDonalds working 80 hours a week.

Being on welfare, or letting your parents pay to raise your child, is not being a parent, and it's not being responsible. So please, enlighten me, who's paying for this child, taxpayers? If so, then you do have the luxurious part of the deal, since I'm working so you can "bring a new life" into this world. :(

I'm sorry, but I have to ask, how are you going to raise this child? Where I live the only place you're old enough to work at is McDonalds. So how are you going to support this child? By support I mean putting a roof over it's head, food on the table, clothes on it's back, doctor visits, etc. etc. etc. Doubt you can afford that even if you do get a job at McDonalds working 80 hours a week.

Being on welfare, or letting your parents pay to raise your child, is not being a parent, and it's not being responsible. So please, enlighten me, who's paying for this child, taxpayers? If so, then you do have the luxurious part of the deal, since I'm working so you can "bring a new life" into this world. :(

She already knows it ain't no luxury - whatever that means.

She already knows it ain't no luxury - whatever that means.

I think it means that we get to work 40 hours a week so that part of our paycheque can go to supporting her and her child. But, she will have to actually take care of the baby, at least while her mother isn't there to help her, or when the father doesn't have visitation every second weekend. :(

Just makes me want to scream. Babies having babies. They have no idea! None at all. Pregnancy is the easy part. It takes more than knowing "it ain't no luxury" to be a parent. Sadly the only one that's going to suffer is this unborn child. I weep for the future.

Where did society go wrong? That's what I'd like to know. Was teen pregnancy always this big a problem and we just didn't know about it before the internet, or is technology, and teen parenting, part of the problem with today's teens? Is it lack of education, or just plain stupidity? Who's raising these teens to think that being a mom at 14 is cool?

I can only say that at almost 14 my son has no desire to parent a child. Thank Dog! Then again, I wouldn't allow it, and yes, I do think that the parents of these children allow way too much, like dating, and too much time out of their supervision. The parents are partly to blame, in my opinion.

I think it means that we get to work 40 hours a week so that part of our paycheque can go to supporting her and her child. But, she will have to actually take care of the baby, at least while her mother isn't there to help her, or when the father doesn't have visitation every second weekend. :(

Just makes me want to scream. Babies having babies. They have no idea! None at all. Pregnancy is the easy part. It takes more than knowing "it ain't no luxury" to be a parent. Sadly the only one that's going to suffer is this unborn child. I weep for the future.

Where did society go wrong? That's what I'd like to know. Was teen pregnancy always this big a problem and we just didn't know about it before the internet, or is technology, and teen parenting, part of the problem with today's teens? Is it lack of education, or just plain stupidity? Who's raising these teens to think that being a mom at 14 is cool?

I can only say that at almost 14 my son has no desire to parent a child. Thank Dog! Then again, I wouldn't allow it, and yes, I do think that the parents of these children allow way too much, like dating, and too much time out of their supervision. The parents are partly to blame, in my opinion.


Actually she can drop the kid off at a day care center where your tax money pays for the child to be looked after while she either goes back to school or gets a job. I do martial arts at a center that does almost nothing but that. Then they get them into pre K programs paid by our tax money for free education. Not to say the free health care under medicaid for mother and child,
I could keep going but I am seeing if my passport is in order to move.

actually she can drop the kid off at a day care center where your tax money pays for the child to be looked after while she either goes back to school or gets a job. I do martial arts at a center that does almost nothing but that. Then they get them into pre K programs paid by our tax money for free education. Not to say the free health care under medicaid for mother and child,
I could keep going but I am seeing if my passport is in order to move.

So we all work our butts off while they continue their education, other people look after their children, they get free medical which the taxpayers pay for? Ya, that seems fair (sarcasm). :(

No wonder so many teens are getting pregnant, it's a free ride in a fancy car that someone else is paying for. Makes me mad. If we want to end teen pregnancy then don't give them anything. Make them work for it, like the rest of us do. Make them live in cardboard boxes on the streets if they can't afford a home, make them dig through trash cans for moldy food if they can't afford to put food on the table, make them wear the same clothes week after week. Maybe then they'll finally realize that being a 14 year old mother isn't as much fun as they think it will be when society finally says they've had enough and will no longer give that support.

A new life my arse! That new life is doomed to become just like the mom! :(

All should be rendered sterile until five years after marriage vows are taken.

All should be rendered sterile until five years after marriage vows are taken.

LOL! I wouldn't go that far. I got married at 24, got pregnant (planned) at 27. I turned 28 ten days after my son was born. We both had careers, made good money, a home, two cars, a dog, parents that were willing to babysit, and free healthcare! You name it. We were ready.

But, even at 27, almost 28, it was hard. I quit working to be a full time mom. My loss of income took a toll. Then both my parents died before my son was 3.

I was double the age the OP is, and the child that posted after her, and I was prepared to have a child, financially, physically, mentally, emotionally, you name it. But it was hard. I also have a husband, and had support. These children have no clue, and why would they, they're still children, they shouldn't be responsible for a child. There's no way they can be. It's not possible, at least not if they're responsible enough to do it on their own.

In other words, to all the teenagers that post here saying that you're prepared to have a baby. Bull. You're prepared to have us pay for you to have a baby. You're prepared to live with your parents while they raise your baby. So don't lie. You're not prepared! We are, and frankly, we're sick of paying for you to play house. At least I am.

I've let this go on a bit, but let's cut LisaDee some slack here. I don't think she was saying its OK for 14 yr olds to get pregnant. I think she was warning that it is not an easy task. All she was saying is that some 14 yr olds do understand the difficulties of that task.

Yes, the likelihood is that a pregnant 14 yr old will be a burden on society or, at the very least their parents. But the fact is that some, albeit a small percentage, will become good parents and raise good children.

Guys no-one is talking about the true subject, yes she underage but she knows that and she is trying to make it better by moving somewhere where she can be supported.
I think the best thing to do is get your boyfriends mum to talk to your parents and make them understand that it will be OK xx Sorry if this doesn't work xx

Guys no-one is talking about the true subject, yes she underage but she knows that and she is trying to make it better by moving somewhere where she can be supported.
I think the best thing to do is get your boyfriends mum to talk to your parents and make them understand that it will be ok xx Sorry if this doesnt work xx


And make them understand? The parents are legally responsible for her. How are the boyfriend's parents going to talk them into anything? How will it be okay?

"Sorry if this doesn't work?"

No one is avoiding the true subject. The subject is that she is 14 years old, ill equipped to raise a baby. Agreed, she's pregnant. Unfortunately, she's also 14 and not emancipated.

LisaDee, what exactly is the virtue in 'creating a new life?' The human race is going to go extinct sooner or later because of all the new life we keep adding to the planet that can't provide (in natural resources as well as human financial support) for the increasing numbers. Now you face 18 years of wondering where your next dollar is coming from, and the days of easy reliance on the taxpayer are over. Welfare, public housing, food, all that will still be here but will be tougher and tougher to get.

That is disgusting and ridiculous. A fourteen year old having a child? Your parents should enforce more disciplinary action on you. I am seriously shocked, and I kind of fell sick to the stomach thinking about you. Good luck during child birth, if you're not too busy crying out in pain.

I'm fifteen and I KNOW that you are an example of what our future generations should not become.

How could you ever lay in bed with a BOY who is only going to ditch you for the "other fish in the sea". No matter how beautiful you are, it won't change the fact that after you give birth and you are nothing but flab, you're "beloved" boyfriend could be cheating on you while you're resting or feeding the baby.

You shouldn't leave your parents being as already are in the parents position. If they want you to have an abortion its because you're an effin CHILD having a child, which is scary. You're going to make them young grandparents. They probably aren't ready yet.

Your boyfriends mom might not mind having you around, and her husband might not mind having you in his bed either. Being around a man who knows that you're a sl*t and extremely stupid is also a stupid thing to do. You'll be pregnant again before you know it.

Yes, my opinions are harsh, but I was raised differently. I was raised with morals, principles, rules, guidelines, discipline, and parents who know how to raise children.

For the sake of our generation, don't be a stupid-a** sl*t.

How could you ever lay in bed with a BOY who is only going to ditch you for the "other fish in the sea". No matter how beautiful you are, it won't change the fact that after you give birth and you are nothing but flab, you're "beloved" boyfriend could be cheating on you while you're resting or feeding the baby.



While I agree with a lot of your ranting, I had to comment on this. You don't know that it's a "fact" that her boyfriend will leave. Some boys are made of sterner stuff and will take responsibility for their actions.

Some will even wind up marrying. Of course some of those will get divorced at a young age because they realize they weren't in love.

Good luck during child birth, if you're not too busy crying out in pain.

How could you ever lay in bed with a BOY who is only going to ditch you for the "other fish in the sea". No matter how beautiful you are, it won't change the fact that after you give birth and you are nothing but flab, you're "beloved" boyfriend could be cheating on you while you're resting or feeding the baby.

Your boyfriends mom might not mind having you around, and her husband might not mind having you in his bed either. Being around a man who knows that you're a sl*t and extremely stupid is also a stupid thing to do. You'll be pregnant again before you know it.

Yes, my opinions are harsh, but I was raised differently. I was raised with morals, principles, rules, guidelines, discipline, and parents who know how to raise children.

For the sake of our generation, don't be a stupid-a** sl*t.


You have a very interesting mouth for a person raised with "morals, principles, rules, guidelines, discriplines and parents who know how to raise children."

And now for your theories on how things work -

"Crying out in pain?" We are no longer in the dark ages.

"After you give birth and you are nothing but flab -" What?

"you're "beloved" boyfriend could be cheating on you while you're resting or feeding the baby."

Don't assume everyone who has a child gets cheated on. It's unfair to the boys/men of the world.

This part isn't harsh. This part is offensive: "Your boyfriends mom might not mind having you around, and her husband might not mind having you in his bed either. Being around a man who knows that you're a sl*t and extremely stupid is also a stupid thing to do. You'll be pregnant again before you know it." She's an "effin" child?

You kiss your mother hello and good-bye and feed yourself with that mouth?

Please - again you are painting all men with the same brush.

I think you're out of line.

I think your parents are trying to scare you straight.

Somewhere in here I feel like saying something like "those without sin, throw the first stone"

Or "love they neighbor as God has loved you"

But I will end with, lets not get off the OP and side tracked, use the report feature to report improper posts, and everyone has a right to post their answer even if they are not what we may agree with, as long as it does not break site rules.

Thus saidith the Moderator, chapter 1 verse 1.

Tiger Woods.

Somewhere in here I feel like saying something like "those without sin, throw the first stone"

Or "love they neighbor as God has loved you"

But I will end with, lets not get off the OP and side tracked, use the report feature to report improper posts, and everyone has a right to post their answer even if they are not what we may agree with, as long as it does not break site rules.

Thus saidith the Moderator, chapter 1 verse 1.


But sometimes something it is reported-ith and no one do-ith anything.

You have a very interesting mouth for a person raised with "morals, principles, rules, guidelines, discriplines and parents who know how to raise children."

And now for your theories on how things work -

"Crying out in pain?" We are no longer in the dark ages.

"After you give birth and you are nothing but flab -" What?

"you're "beloved" boyfriend could be cheating on you while you're resting or feeding the baby."

Don't assume everyone who has a child gets cheated on. It's unfair to the boys/men of the world.

This part isn't harsh. This part is offensive: "Your boyfriends mom might not mind having you around, and her husband might not mind having you in his bed either. Being around a man who knows that you're a sl*t and extremely stupid is also a stupid thing to do. You'll be pregnant again before you know it."

Please - again you are painting all men with the same brush.

I think you're out of line.

I think your parents are trying to scare you straight.
The part about me having an interesting mouth is... interesting. I thought about it for a moment. Since you don't know me, I'll help you out on this one. Usually, normally, I do not swear. I'm against it. But this post brought up strong, VERY strong emotions in me. As you saw. I am not making excuses. My parents know that when I'm extremely angry I tend to slip words that shouldn't be slipped. I know that too, and just because I haven't perfected that part of me, doesn't mean I don't try. In short I'm not supposed to swear, my parents don't allow me to swear, and believe it or not, I try not to swear. I look back at my comment and see that I need to edit it.

the part about me having an interesting mouth is... interesting. i thought about it for a moment. since you don't know me, i'll help you out on this one. usually, normally, i do not swear. i'm against it. but this post brought up strong, VERY strong emotions in me. as you saw. i am not making excuses. my parents know that when i'm extremely angry i tend to slip words that shouldn't be slipped. i know that too, and just because i haven't perfected that part of me, doesn't mean i don't try. in short i'm not supposed to swear, my parents don't allow me to swear, and believe it or not, i try not to swear. i look back at my comment and see that i need to edit it.
And please do not say that I am out of line. I'm not.

the part about me having an interesting mouth is... interesting. i thought about it for a moment. since you don't know me, i'll help you out on this one. usually, normally, i do not swear. i'm against it. but this post brought up strong, VERY strong emotions in me. as you saw. i am not making excuses. my parents know that when i'm extremely angry i tend to slip words that shouldn't be slipped. i know that too, and just because i haven't perfected that part of me, doesn't mean i don't try. in short i'm not supposed to swear, my parents don't allow me to swear, and believe it or not, i try not to swear. i look back at my comment and see that i need to edit it.


Don't bother helping me out - I don't really care.

So you try not to swear but comments by a stranger on an anonymous board cause you to swear?

and please do not say that i am out of line. i'm not.


An accusation that the father of the father (who actually is the grandfather of the child) will have sex with the mother is totally out of line. The average man has morals, believe it or not, and doesn't jump on anything that moves.

Your parents really need to try harder, starting with women being flabby after they have a child.

Did they raise you to post on adult sites?

So we all work our butts off while they continue their education, other people look after their children, they get free medical which the taxpayers pay for? Ya, that seems fair (sarcasm). :(

No wonder so many teens are getting pregnant, it's a free ride in a fancy car that someone else is paying for. Makes me mad. If we want to end teen pregnancy then don't give them anything. Make them work for it, like the rest of us do. Make them live in cardboard boxes on the streets if they can't afford a home, make them dig through trash cans for moldy food if they can't afford to put food on the table, make them wear the same clothes week after week. Maybe then they'll finally realize that being a 14 year old mother isn't as much fun as they think it will be when society finally says they've had enough and will no longer give that support.

A new life my arse! That new life is doomed to become just like the mom! :(

This is the longest thread I have seen so far on any topic. So much has been said but I must add my two cents. I know that having sex at such a young age is wrong. In fact, as the mother of two teenagers, I am appalled by the prospect of a child losing his or her virginity at fourteen. I do not think a young teen is ready for the responsibility of sex or childbearing/rearing. That being said, I think our society sets these children up to make bad decisions about sex. The songs, movies, TV shows, entertainers, even advertisements are constantly sending messages that it is okay even expected that people should have sex out of wedlock. Our children are told that sex is the ultimate experience. Our children hear these messages everyday. They see examples of it everyday. Soon these messages become internalized in their psyches, and they act out on what they are constantly being told. Parents don't help because they are constantly working to put a roof over their childrens' heads, or just not actively involved in their childrens' lives. Many parents do not even talk to their children about sex because of their own lack of knowledge or comfort with the topic. There are many other factors affecting the sexual choices that our young people are making. But given he fact that society has set up these dynamics that contribute to our children making poor choices about sex, should we just abandon them and their offspring? I don't think we should just allow them to eat out of trashcans, and quit school. I think that we should be looking toward helping these young people to become more self-sufficient so that they can support their children. We can either support them and help them become self-sufficient productive citizens or we can support them and their children in prisons. Also keep in mind that it seems this girl does not have a good supportive homelife - it seems she has been raising herself (another factor that contributes to teen pregnancy). I could say more, but I would like to end with this: I hope the OP is not forced to have an abortion. If the paternal grandparents are willing to help, I hope they are allowed to help. One more thing, I hate to think of the prospect of this young man going to jail. That does not seem like the right thing to do. They both made a bad decision to have sex. He is not some adult who took advantage of a child. I hope for the best for her, the young man, and Mason.

Tiger Woods.


Just when I think a thread can't get any more stupid -

Oh, and for the record it's Tiger Wood who, as far as I can tell didn't get pregnant at 14, didn't get anyone pregnant at 14 and didn't have sex with a 14-year old who has a child.

So your point is - ?

What about Tiger Woods? Because one man was weak you automatically assumes all men are? Judy was more right than me here. Upon reviewing your response I think you were out of line. If you didn't refer to parents (plural), I might guess you were raised by a single mother who was mistreated by a man. Or maybe you had a bad experience. You lack of compassion towards the OP who may have made mistakes, but was trying to deal with them, is telling. I have to wonder why this situation stirred you so much.

and please do not say that i am out of line. i'm not.


Read the language you used. Read the language the adults on this thread used.

See the difference - ?

Oh my god. The girls' story upset me because premarital sex is wrong. The fact that she didn't use protection bugs me even more. Whatever, you think its okay and that she should move in with her boyfriends parents, and I think that what she did was wrong. Shall we proceed to forgetting each other? Thank you and nice meeting you. I'm sorry to hear about your husband. May he rest in peace.

oh my god. the girls' story upset me because premarital sex is wrong. the fact that she didnt use protection bugs me even more. whatever, you think its okay and that she should move in with her boyfriends parents, and i think that what she did was wrong. shall we proceed to forgetting each other? thank you and nice meeting you. i'm sorry to hear about your husband. may he rest in peace.

Did you actually read the responses to this thread? Have you read similar threads? If you believe that "premarital sex is wrong" you are swimming upstream. Teenage sex is wrong! But the fact is that much of the world doesn't agree that what two consenting adults do in the privacy of their homes is anyone else's business. I have stated several times that I don't believe that sex is a recreation and that no one should engage in sexual intercourse unless they are prepared to have a child. And hearing about 14 year olds getting pregnant disturbs me too. It disturbs most of the people here. But we don't come down on them with a rant such as you let loose.

oh my god. the girls' story upset me because premarital sex is wrong. the fact that she didnt use protection bugs me even more. whatever, you think its okay and that she should move in with her boyfriends parents, and i think that what she did was wrong. shall we proceed to forgetting each other? thank you and nice meeting you. i'm sorry to hear about your husband. may he rest in peace.

Did you read all the posts in this thread? Seems like you didn't, you just came here, ranted, raved, and then felt entitled to talk down to others. That's what I see in your posts.

The fact is, this girl is pregnant, and she's 14. Saying that you don't agree with premarital sex, or the fact that she's 14, or any of the other sermons, doesn't change the facts. Most of us are just as upset about the fact that a 14 year old child is having a child. I don't think one single person, with any sense, has said that her pregnancy is a good thing, or the right thing for a child her age, or any child for that matter.

I would highly suggest that you read before you post, and also realize that just because you're Christian, and have your beliefs, doesn't mean that everyone else does. This is a worldwide site, with many different people from all over the world. Not everyone believes in God, or Christianity. So keep that in mind. You have the right to your beliefs, as does everyone else on this site, but no one has the right to push their beliefs on others.

youscous, your naïveté is showing. When you are older and wiser you won't preach and moralize at the already done deed. The pregnant teen, the drunk on the street, the classmate in a meth frenzy, the speeding driver lying broken by his wrecked car, the compulsive gambler losing his family's house and savings. You say you are a Christian? There but for the grace of God go I, just for starters. For middles, love thy neighbor as thyself. For enders - one of those really could be you someday, despite what you think now.

I understand that and with both of us working im sure we coild do it along with his familys help, i have people to help and i already have a lot of diapers and clothes and all of that just need to get formula. Thats it, i already hve most of it different sizes of diapers up to threes.


I realize this is going to happen and so this is just a discussion.

You are prepared, right? How many diapers are a "lot" and how many do you have in different sizes? This alone could be a big shock to you - and your bank account.

Hey Judy, Mason hasn't been back for a while.

Hey Judy, Mason hasn't been back for a while.


Whoops - I didn't realize how old the thread is.

Time for a big red "closed" sign?

(I'm suffering from Post Traumatic AMHD Syndrome.)