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View Full Version : I'm in a long distance relationship but I'm starting to like someone else.


lej33
Mar 27, 2012, 12:31 PM
I've been in a long distance relationship for about 4 months now. We were really in love with each other... basic teenage love. We had our fair share of dates, despite not really being able to see each other, but now I'm starting to get really busy with schoolwork and he is as well. We haven't been really talking as much. We've also encountered problems concerning our relationship. (Ex: getting annoyed at him when he's just being himself, fighting about meeting up, trust issues... )
I've been started talking to another guy and we've become really good friends. I realized that I'm starting to get feelings for him. At first I thought it was a little crush but now it's starting to build. My boyfriend has no idea that this is happening (of course) and I just feel really bad. I have no idea what to do. The guy I've been talking to also feels the same way..
But, the guy doesn't want me to break up with my boyfriend because he doesn't want to be the cause of our break up. He also doesn't want me to hurt my boyfriend.
I really wish I wasn't the one causing him pain... I wish I was receiving the pain instead.
I honestly have no idea what to do...
Any suggestions/answers are appreciated!

talaniman
Mar 27, 2012, 09:33 PM
This is no dilemma as your decision lies in being honest and fair and treating your boyfriend the way you would want him to treat you.

Ask yourself how you would want him to deal with having feelings for another while with you?

Being honest, is better than cheating, right?

sparks123
Apr 7, 2012, 09:37 AM
I was once in the same situation. My boyfriend moved 5 hours away, and I only saw him every couple weekends. It really strained our relationship, and I didn't want to bother him by whining about it, so I started talking to my ex. My ex was now a really good friend who listened well. Suddenly, we started flirting and before I knew it, we kissed. I thought I must have had these "feelings" for the ex because my boyfriend wasn't around. And for a long time I thought nothing of the cheating because I didn't believe the feelings for the ex was actually true. I thought I was just lonely and let the ex take advantage of my lonely feelings. However, a few months down the road when my boyfriend moved back home, I realized that I didn't cheat on him out of loneliness. It was because I wanted to be with the other guy.

Point is, that you need to make sure of what you truly want. You also have to realize if you want to truly be with the guy, or if you are only with him because your boyfriend is gone and you're lonely. Then, when you've figured it all out, if you want the guy, you have to end it with your boyfriend. I know you don't want to hurt him, but even if you stay with him, you'll be hurting him just as much.