princessdiva
Mar 26, 2012, 05:50 AM
I am 26 years old and I've been married for 4 years, no children yet but we are planning to try next year after we finish our studies. My marriage is quite complicated, not because I want to but I am a normal human who have feelings too. Please do not jump to conclusions, I just want some guidelines!
In 4 years, I only did intercourse with my husband once because he feels pain and according to the doctor, he needs to be circumcized. The operation is quite a painful one and every time we talk about it he tells me that once we plan to have children, he will take it from there and see how it goes. In the meantime, we rarely have sex and we are like two close friends living under the same roof. I certainly know that he loves to watch porn while I'm out and masturbates on his own. I am sure that he has no affairs because he is a one-woman man. I tried my best with him like wearing sexy lingerie, cuddle him but he doesn't take the hint. I do not want to leave him because he is a kind-hearted man and I always found him in times of despair.
As I said previously, this has been going on for years and I met a married man and had sex with him as well. We both agreed that we do not have plans to leave our spouse because in real life, we can never belong to each other because he is 55 years old. In this person, I found the love I've been searching for a long time but I know that we cannot belong to each other. I know that fidelity is suppose to be forever for good and bad but I feel so alone, unloved (in a sexual way). I think he is doing bad as well for putting porn before me. I also tried to speak with a marriage counselor and I was told that our relationship is quite close to an open relationship but things remained the same. I know that he wants to have sex with me only to have children.
Any help please? I am so confused and hurt...
In 4 years, I only did intercourse with my husband once because he feels pain and according to the doctor, he needs to be circumcized. The operation is quite a painful one and every time we talk about it he tells me that once we plan to have children, he will take it from there and see how it goes. In the meantime, we rarely have sex and we are like two close friends living under the same roof. I certainly know that he loves to watch porn while I'm out and masturbates on his own. I am sure that he has no affairs because he is a one-woman man. I tried my best with him like wearing sexy lingerie, cuddle him but he doesn't take the hint. I do not want to leave him because he is a kind-hearted man and I always found him in times of despair.
As I said previously, this has been going on for years and I met a married man and had sex with him as well. We both agreed that we do not have plans to leave our spouse because in real life, we can never belong to each other because he is 55 years old. In this person, I found the love I've been searching for a long time but I know that we cannot belong to each other. I know that fidelity is suppose to be forever for good and bad but I feel so alone, unloved (in a sexual way). I think he is doing bad as well for putting porn before me. I also tried to speak with a marriage counselor and I was told that our relationship is quite close to an open relationship but things remained the same. I know that he wants to have sex with me only to have children.
Any help please? I am so confused and hurt...