Hi guys & girls,
I really need some help,
I've been with my boyfriend for over 2 years now. We don't live together but see each other almost every second day. Over the past 2 years I've found porn on his PlayStation, PC and mobile phone. On every single occasion not ONCE did he admit it was him, he told me it was his brother and when I found it on his phone he said it must of already been on the phone as he only bought it a month previous (even though it was saved to his memory card).
Already I feel foolish for believing the above excuses but he is a very convincing person and swears on his heart it wasn't him.
Last night I found stuff in the 'History' of his mobile phone, I showed him and told him not to lie and to just come out and admit it to me, which he did.
This now leads me to wonder if he has lied about ALL the other times. I would'nt mind him watching porn, it just worries me that he has lied.
On some of the previous occasions that I found evidence (e.g history,videos,pictures,condom wrappers, cummy towels, tissue paper stuffed down side of bed) he has gotten aggressive, thrown things around the room, punched the walls, shouted at me calling me a 'stupid paranoid *****' and later calmed down and apologized and said "I just get so angry for being accused of something when I'm completely innocent".
I don't know what to do. I'm afraid he reacts so agressivly because he has a problem/addiction?
Can you guys pleeeease help me out, it's all I can think about.

Well... I had a complete answer until I got to the condom wrappers part. Does anyone really use condoms for masturbation? I have to wonder if there is more involved to this point...

Anyway, that part aside... I'd have to say that yes, he was probably lying about the other times. Still, why are you so worried about it? It's pretty much normal to do this so why make it into such an issue? The fact that you confront him about it may embarrass him or make him feel shame somehow. Maybe he just doesn't need you to know this. Maybe you are too confrontational when asking him about it... I don't know but that would be my guess.

Why were you snooping on his Playstation, PC, and phone? Looks like more than just one type of trust issue here.

If you did that to me I'd get bent out of shape too, I don't blame him... after all who appointed you queen of everything...

The ONLY thing that would require ANY explanation to another person was the condom wrappers... particularly if you don't use them together.

Yes, you don't live together and I would assume and guess when you asked about the porn, it was not, lets watch it together, but more accusing him of the use. So he felt you were mad about it and lied.

So you found it, you know he watches it, who cares, if that was your attitude you don't even ask him. Why where you even asking him, it is his to watch, and is not really your business.

The condom is of course. Next he should just have told you to hit the road, if he is knocking holes in the wall, then he has a anger issues also.

I must agree with the other posts. You're not his wife... or his mother. Either accept him "as is" or move on. If you're afraid that he has anger issues, then tell him that you're concerned and that you would like to speak to him about it. Be resolute, yet gentle. Just remember, you are not a prison warden. He doesn't HAVE to answer to you, so tact is key. Good luck.