OK.. here goes. In Dec. 2009 my husband was killed in a car accident.. we have a daughter that is now 4 yrs old. I have a 15 yr old and 12 yr old and their father died in 2006. Well about a year after my husband was killed in the car accident in 2009 I ended up dating his brother.. I know it sounds wrong and it's a long story that is not part of my question. Well when I got with his brother he sort of lifted my kids and I up from a depression and we started to change his life.. he had questionable background. Well he became somewhat of a father figure to my children ecspecially my son.. who just wanted a Dad. Well in Dec. Of 2011 while I was sleeping he let my son drink with him and they left for a ride and got into a horrible accident. He drove at an obscene speed and scared my son.. thank God my son put his seatbelt on right before it happened.. they ended up wrapped around a tree on my sons side. They had to be cut out of the car.. the car which I hear did no longer resemble one. The police and EMTs said they didn't expect a survivor inside that car. They said they were so lucky to be alive. My son was life flighted twice.. for an hour I didn't know where he was or if he was alive. The driver I knew was in bad shape.. he ended up in a coma for about a month with heart and brain problems... but now is walking with a cane and is sneaky with his actions. My son had no coma but he had to have metal put in his femur and knee and had a broken pelvis bone.. along with nightmares sleepless nights and anxiety. It has been a long haul. Well alll the while this has been going on my late husbands family.. which would be the driver (boyfriend) family also have been talking horrible hurtful things about me and my family as though it was my fault that the crash happened.. its like they forgot my son was even in the accident at all. The Father in law sits at the local bar night after night or wherever he can catch an audience and says horrible hurtful things about me like I'm crazy and I made him do it and that my late husband always said bad things about me.. mind you my husband never thought much of his father... but anyway.. his audience are my friends and acquaintances who are sick and tired of it but what's worse is he doesn't have anything to do with my daughter who is his granddaughter because of this... and I am so sick and tired of hearing all this from so many people.. all these horrible lies and immature rumors he says ALL THE TIME ! I have enough to deal with right now taking care of my family and helping them through this but every time I go to town I hear more and more to the point that I don't even want to leave my house with my kids.I NEVER would have let him take my son. People I hardly see anymore are coming up to me asking me if some of the things are true.. Should I bother suing him?. I don't want anything other than for him to shut his mouth.. it'll be great when my daughter is old enough and hears all the things her grampa says about her mom.. what do you think?

Sue him for what ?

He has the constitutional right to flap his gums... just as you do.
Unless you can definatively PROVE they are false and meant to be harmful, AND you can prove monetary damages... AND pay absurd ammounts of money to lawyers to try and sue... its best to let a bitter old drunk banter away... most people don't take them all that seriously anyway.

If he continues to say damaging things then you could get a restraining order against him. The problem with that is your friends will have to choose sides. If he does say something then they are going to have to let you know. If they keep quiet about it so as to stay out of anothers busainess then your back at square one anyway just without the knowlage of knowing what is going on.