View Full Version : How do I do this?
jessam
Feb 28, 2012, 03:06 PM
I'm 17 and have a 3 month old baby.I want to get on the pregnancy patch BUT I don't want my mom to know. The problem is I'm only out of thr house for school and SOMETIMES with my boyfriend but he mainly comes here and of course we r starting to have sex again. I would ask my boyfriend to take me but I feeel that's a turn off? Is it? Can someone help me please?
odinn7
Feb 28, 2012, 03:24 PM
So let's see if I have this...
You're 17 and have a baby (which to me means you've already had sex)... you and your boyfriend are starting to have sex again so you want some form of birth control... BUT, you don't want your mother to know you are on birth control and you don't want to turn off your boyfriend by trying to be responsible and get birth control.
Sure, yeah, that makes perfect sense.
Listen, I have a feeling your mother already knows you're having sex. Something tells me she has it figured out. I would say that she would probably rather help you with birth control rather than having another baby in the house because you don't want to be responsible. If this doesn't work for you, then I suggest you stop worrying about whether your boyfriend might be turned off by taking you to get some. Birth control is his responsibility too... did you know that? Hey, maybe he could wear condoms... you know, if that doesn't turn him off. Wouldn't want that to happen.
jessam
Feb 28, 2012, 09:45 PM
My boyfriend and I don't use condoms because they irritate me down there... nd tru he should not be turn off by taking me to gget the patch but like I said with a baby its school then home weekend sometimes boyfriend tym alone
odinn7
Feb 28, 2012, 09:51 PM
Then you can expect to get pregnant again and see how well that goes over with your mother.
The point is, you are not being responsible at all. You shouldn't be having sex because you are not ready to be having sex. Since you are doing it, and you obviously will continue to do it anyway, you need to be responsible and get birth control... or you can expect another baby without a doubt. Do you really want that? Does your mother?
Not all condoms cause irritation. Try different types. Perhaps it is the latex ones that are the issue.
Alty
Feb 28, 2012, 10:01 PM
You have a child, you're 17, and you're still having unprotected sex? Did you learn nothing?
If you're mature enough to be a mother then you're mature enough to be responsible. You're 17, you and your boyfriend aren't likely to last statistically speaking. In fact, the odds are not at all great. The lottery is better odds.
So why risk another pregnancy with a guy you're not likely to be with for much longer?
This just makes me so mad. The lack of maturity is astounding, and you're responsible for a child? Makes me fear for the future.
You're a mother, be an adult, because like it or not, that's what you have to be now. If being on the patch is a turn off, then that's not a bad thing. Let him be turned off. Turned off means no more sex and no more teen pregnancy!
jessam
Feb 28, 2012, 10:01 PM
I'm trying to get on the patch not sure how to do it behind my moms back and I think it is the lub it the condoms perhaps... I want to be responsible and get the patch but not sure how to talk and ask my boyfriend about it and if he will hellp me by taking me
Fr_Chuck
Feb 28, 2012, 10:10 PM
No, you are a child who has not learned anything, if you want to be responsible you don't go behind your moms back, and you and your boyfriend sit down and discuss birth control, discuss different brands and types of condoms. You may even try some variations to see which ones may or may not cause any irritation.
As for the patch ( or birth control pills) you have your boyfriend take you, if you are not grown up enough to discuss this with your parents.
Which is a bigger turn off, sitting down with boyfriend to pick out another babies name or discussing proper use of birth controls.
jessam
Feb 28, 2012, 10:10 PM
I'm a great mom fyi I put my baby first I have gave my baby everything I had and have he is in great care as I'm saying for the like 5th tym I'm trying too be resonsible and get the patch I need my boyfriend to take me and I have no idea how to ask specialy since condoms irritate me down there latex or not... I am trying to. Be responsible best I can with the type of mother I have... has said I'm not letting you get birth control and you better not coehome pregnant... so that leaves me with getting it my own way... and. My boyfriend and I are careful he never finishes in me or on me and we try spermisiddes... so basically I need to know how to get the patch on my own where I can get it and how to ask my boyfriend to take me because him as a guy may get grossed out
odinn7
Feb 28, 2012, 10:12 PM
Why is it a problem if your mother knows? I think she would rather help you get birth control than to have you pregnant again.
Lube is the problem? Get non-lubricated.
You don't know how to ask him and if he will help? Well guess what... you're having sex with him, he needs to help. If he isn't willing to help, what does that tell you about him?
jessam
Feb 28, 2012, 10:15 PM
Boys and men don't like talking about girl situations like periods birth control and oth female things
odinn7
Feb 28, 2012, 10:21 PM
Oh really?
I never had a problem discussing birth control with my girl friends... especially since it was concerning me.
I see here that you really don't want to do this. You want a simple answer that simply doesn't exist. You've been told to tell your mother. You can't. You've been told to tell your boyfriend. You can't. You don't really want to hear what we have to say yet you asked us for advice. I'm done here as I'm wasting my time.
Wondergirl
Feb 28, 2012, 10:31 PM
Your boyfriend would much rather have you be on the patch and him not having to mess with a condom that takes away a lot of the good feeling he gets without one. Guys usually prefer no condom and the female being responsible for the birth control.
Of course, STDs are spread without a condom, so if you two have other partners, a condom is needed each time.
J_9
Feb 29, 2012, 07:14 AM
"Boys" may not like to talk about birth control, bug MEN don't mind. I understand you can't tell your mom, so you tell your boyfriend that he doesn't get into your pants unless he takes you to the doctor for birth control.