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View Full Version : Why didn't she forgive me?


meshkr
Feb 3, 2012, 02:36 AM
Recently I met a girl [we're both in our early twenties] who I dated a couple of times. Given that I didn't want something lasting or engaging with her, I didn't accept her invitation to go on another date, excusing that I had to study at home. I went out with my friends, and she presumably saw me, as she accused me of not being reliable. One word led to another, and we kind quarreled. Anyway, later I told her I was extremely sorry for what I had done. She didn't forgive me, and I believe she'll never do it, which has made feel too bad now.

Should I write to her again, or let go of all what happened?
Any advice is greatly appreciated!

Berryx3
Feb 3, 2012, 06:47 AM
Well in my opinion that was a really ******* move on your part but whatever boys will be boys. Definitely write to her again she'll see that you really are sorry ask her if you can make it up to her. If she accepts make it count but don't get too confident.

meshkr
Feb 3, 2012, 09:17 AM
Thanks for your advice.
What I'm really concerned about is not that I want to be with her now but the reason why it is so difficult for some people to forgive.
Do they believe they're so perfect themselves that they can't forgive others?
How should we deal with such people?

Fr_Chuck
Feb 3, 2012, 09:34 AM
Let me see you lied to her, which proves her point, and honestly you are just sorry you got caught not really sorry you lied, and would most likely do the same lie again to someone else.

And forgive does not mean they should trust you again.

JudyKayTee
Feb 3, 2012, 09:35 AM
How should YOU deal with someone who is upset that you lied to her? I think you've got this backwards.

You are NOT the victim here. You lied and got caught in the lie and YOU wonder how to deal with "these" people?

Leave her alone. There's no need for any additional contact. You already proved who/what you are.

meshkr
Feb 3, 2012, 09:44 AM
I'm not saying that I'm the VICTIM here, nor forgiving myself for what I did either, but everyone makes mistakes, right? Well, I also know that there's no point in asking her again to forgive me...

The only advice I'm seeking from you is how not to feel so bad myself now, and what to do to get all of it over.

JudyKayTee
Feb 3, 2012, 10:24 AM
I'm not saying that i'm the VICTIM here, nor forgiving myself for what i did either, but everyone makes mistakes, right? Well, i also know that there's no point in asking her again to forgive me...

The only advice i'm seeking from you is how not to feel so bad myself now, and what to do to get all of it over.


I think you should feel bad - you hurt someone for absolutely no reason. I don't think you're going to get dispensation for that here. This certainly sounds like you are finding fault with HER - and I think she's faultless here: "Do they believe they're so perfect themselves that they can't forgive others??
How should we deal with such people??"

So stop dwelling on your lie, move on, learn from it.

Why are you obsessing over this?

meshkr
Feb 3, 2012, 11:28 AM
Yeah... you're right! All I can I do now is learn a lesson from it...

Thank you all for the advice given!