I would like to know if there is any way for me to terminate my parental rights and responsibilities. The way that I became a "parent" will seem strange to some and seemingly impossible to others, but all I can do is say the facts and ask if there is any way to get this fixed.

To start, I was with my ex for 3 years. We were together in high school and she was younger than me. It got to a point in our relationship where she thought that it was okay to start talking about having babies and begging me to give her a baby. Naturally, I said no. "Hell no," to be exact, 1, because she was still in high school and I was in college, and 2, because I did not want to have a kid. The begging continued until I finally hit my limit and broke things off because of it.

For a few weeks to a month we kept in contact but did not date and it seemed that she had dropped the entire thing. So I gave her another chance. About 2 weeks into her second chance, she drugged me with some high powered pain killers, that I had from having my wisdom teeth out, in a drink, put a condom on me, and went about "harvesting" some semen from me while I was out on cloud nine.

When I finally came to several hours later, she told me that she had taken care of everything and that I would not have to worry about giving her a baby because she just made sure that it would happen. When I asked what she was talking about, she told me that after she had finished with me, she took the condom to the bathroom and used a turkey baster to "put the 'swimmers' where they belong."

Naturally I was irate about the entire thing and told her that I was leaving her and that it was a complete mistake to have ever given her a second chance. That was when she decided to tell me that if I ever left her again, she would tell her parents that I raped her and that she never said anything because she was so scared that I would hurt her for telling. Being the upright, and now completely terrified citizen that I am, I stayed with her. A rape charge could have sent me, wrongly, to prison. I am not going to prison for her.

From that point the baby was born and all I wanted was out, but the more I expressed that, the more I was told that the rape charges could still be filed, and that if I didn't "plaster a smile on my face and play the role of a happy father," they would be. When it came to signing the birth certificate, she did the same thing, and I, of course signed it to keep myself out of prison. I was then told, by her parents, that no child support would be filed for as long as I stayed with her, but weeks later, the papers were in the mail anyway. I threw a fit, but then, once again, was told that if I did "just shut up, put a smile on my face, play the role of a happy father, and sign all the paperwork," the rape charges would be filed. So, all the paperwork was signed and I did it with my fake smile, all the while I was sitting there terrified with no knowledge of what to do or where to turn next.

I never really told anyone about this story because I have been rather afraid of what might happen, but I need to know what to do. I have no desire to be a part of the kid's life, and I have since called her bluff and moved on with my life. I am now happily married to the only woman I have ever truly loved and this whole thing upsets her more and more every day. Not because of the fact that I have a kid with another person, but because of the injustice that has been done to me. She knows that I want to have nothing to do with the child or her mother, and she only wants to see me happy. I am sick and tired of living this way.

Someone please tell me what can be done if anything. My wife and I have done some research on the topic and we know that some criminal charges can be filed against her, but I need to know more than anything how to get my name removed from the birth certificate, how to get the child support stopped, and how to get this whole mess straightened out. I am the first one to take responsibility for my own actions, but I do not believe that I should be responsible for the actions of my ex or for her child. PLEASE HELP!

Sorry but your not getting out of child support. Are you pressing rape charges against her? Is that what your trying to say? How are you going to prove it? How old were the both of you when this happened ?

What proof do you have of this story? I'm not saying I don't believe you, but I don't think a court or jury will.

The only fact that matters here is that you are the biological father of this child. So a court will hold you financially responsible for this child.

Had you asked when this first happened, I would have told you to go to the police and have her charged with theft and extortion. The likelihood of a rape charge sticking was almost nil. A prosecutor would be very unlikely to prosecute a rape charge from someone you had a 3 year relationship with. No jury would believe that either.

So my advice is to contact a lawyer who can advise you on whether have a chance of bringing a rape charge and a theft of semen charge against her. What you described was rape by the way. But I doubt if that will fly.

Yes, the turkey baster thing seldom works and just on one try, while possible, not likely.
Did you have a DNA test to see if the child was even yours before signing the birth certificate, that would have been the very first thing.

After that, sorry, not a court in the world would ever believe your story and I will guess you have not a single bit of evidence.

So no there is no way to sign away your rights and no way to get out of child support.

There was no paternity test done, so I am only the "father" on paper. There is honestly no difference between what she did and going to a sperm bank, just she stole it and didn't have to go through the paperwork for it. I kept a journal of points that raised a large deal of concern to me throughout the entire relationship because she used to cut herself and told me that she had stopped. Prior to the baby problem, she had threatened on more than one occasion to commit suicide if I left her. The cutting scars are faint but visible.

At this point, I am not sure how to prove all of this. I have talked to a couple of lawyers, one of whom laughed in my face when I told her this story, and the other would not let me finish the first sentence before giving me any advice whatso ever. I plan to press charges of emotional black mail which is a felony, extortion, theft of semen and now rape. I really don't understand why the court system is set up to favor every woman just because she can pop out a kid. I'm sorry if I offend anyone, but it is the truth and I am getting very, very frustrated. The legal system, no matter how much they deny it, is set up to favor women in this sort of thing and most related things.

I wanted nothing to do with a child at the time and I still don't. I was 19 and she was 16 when this happened and her mother told her that it was okay for her to have sex. I am now 21 and she will be 18 in 2 months. The relationship was very obsessive on her part and it still is. She is creating online accounts under my name and email, using my SSN to try to hack into my various accounts, and she even tried to create a new cell phone account for my already active phone number so that she could unblock her number from it. She has sent my wife text messages basically telling her what she did. Here is one; "You might as well give up now. I created this family for us and he only married you to get over me. He is mine. Just quit while you are ahead."

Now, I may have a biased few on it because I know what she did, but I'm pretty sure that she just admitted to what she did in that. That is not all that she has said either! There are more texts like that. Also there was a phone call from a restricted number to my wife saying, "Go away *****, you have no right being where you are." When the call was ended she called the phone company and pressed harassment charges against that number. I plan to talk to a few more lawyers before I try to proceed because I cannot be the only one out there that this has happened to. However, if one more of them laughs in my face, or does not let me talk and tell them what happened, I may hit the ceiling.

Thank you for the help that you have given so far. If there is anything more that I can do with what I have said please let me know.

... What you described was rape by the way. But I doubt if that will fly.

The strangest story I have read here in a long time, to be sure.

But, if true, I don't know if it would be rape.

Many such statutes require some sort of "insertion". I'm not sure if insertion into a condom would count.

1. She claimed she harvested your semen. Was that true? Did you even see a used condom? Maybe she did have one and had filled it with dairy cream or thinned-out marshmallow fluff. Or maybe there was no condom.

2. It's probably nearly impossible to use a baster to get pregnant the way she claims she did and immediately the way she claimed.

3. Get a paternity test done. Your ex could have been already pregnant by someone else, and you got to be the fall guy. (She could have had sex with someone else in order to get pregnant, eventually accomplished her objective, and then told you that you are the father.)

This sounds like Fatal Attraction 2.

You took her word without getting a paternity test? That was not very smart! I assumed a test had been performed. That's the first thing you should do. ANY question on law needs to include your general locale as laws vary by area. But your ages do present an issue here. If she was 16, then she may have pressed charges for statutory rape as she might have been under the age of consent.

But the very first thing you need to do is get a court to order a paternity test.

You are doing the right thing (finally), by collecting all her communications. You may be able to prove at least part of your story from them. Frankly, if your story is to be believed, you need to ask a court to have her submit to a psychiatric exam because she sounds mentally unstable.

Identity Theft is an important issue. Pursue charges on that. Contact the SSA and see if you can get a new SSN.

You said she made a call to your wife then called the phone company to claim harassment? But doesn't the record show SHE made the call? Again an example of mental instability. But you and your wife should NOT answer any calls from blocked numbers. Let them go to voice mail.

If you talk to another lawyer START with showing them evidence of her harassment. Don't get to the turkey baster part until they can see what she has been doing. That might prevent some of the laughter. And talk to your local prosecutor or DA. Show them the evidence of identity theft, and harassment and extortion. Then get to the basis.

As to you being raped. AK had a point, so rather than charge her with rape, talk about sexual assault.

I'm not saying I believe you, this still seems a far-fetched story. But I'm willing to offer advice as if it is true. So you have a list of actions to take, starting with a paternity test (that's probably the only way you can terminate your responsibility). So get moving and keep us posted.