Needing some assistance in letting go of a woman. It all started several years ago when we first met. Both of us were in relationships and talk for just a few days getting into heated discussions. At that time we decided to say goodbye to each other realizing it wasn't right. Approximately 3 years passed by and we met once again by luck, started talking again and both of us confirmed we were not happy in our relationships.

We talked about the way we left things years back and decided to forgive and forget that part which allowed us to focus on us and plan our future together. We talked about a lifetime together, seen each other as much as possible, talked everyday and night. As time passed my intuition told me something was wrong, she became more distant and one day out of nowhere she tells me we can only be friends. This news made me angry, hurt, wondering what happened, what I could do to change this news. After a few days I agreed to be friends with her, she told me she was happy with that. A few days passed and she was out partying with her friends and contacted me late one evening explaining how I was in the relationship, saying I would be tested without me knowing with the help of her friend etc.

I truly love this woman so decided to continue to work on us. Time went by, things appeared to be working out well until I went away for a few days for training. Upon returning from training a hickey was discovered on her right breast, confronting her about the mark she responded it's a pimple. This was not a pimple as it looked like a bruise not a pimple. I would get upset when she went to the bars with her single male friends alone. My research discovered she cheated on every man she's been with. How can I love someone like this knowing it's totally wrong? I have changed and not in a good way either, have become angry, non trusting, verbal abusing her.

She has never been physically abused by myself (NO WAY!) but how does one let this go? I still love her with all my heart even though I know she will never be true to any man she's with. Please HELP! Thanks

The answer to your question is "addiction". I'm not trying to minimalize your pain, but believe me, sometimes we stay in one place on our life path strictly because we are so hooked to that spot that we can't see a way to move on. It sounds as if you already know that your relationship with this woman is unhealthy for you. If you can't "kick the habit" on your own, you might want to try seeking counseling. But I would suggest that you stop seeing her as soon as possible. Make your own life your priority for now. You say you know she will never be a loyal, faithful partner, and it's clear that you don't want the kind of relationship she's offering, so be true to your own needs.

"Love" is a tricky concept. Often familiarity and inertia are mistaken for it, and fear of loss can play a huge part. We go through withdrawal over much smaller issues like foods the doctor says we can't have or a job we thought we absolutely needed to stay in. Relationships are the same. Once you put some space between you and this woman and take a little time to let the confusion subside, you will be able to find a more satisfying relationship. I suggest you fill the spaces in your life with activities and people you enjoy.

Good luck!

All you need is absolutely no more contact with her in any fashion. Its not easy, but better than the misery you are in for sure. PLUS No Contact will let you keep YOUR dignity, and self respect, PLUS, she can't cheat on you!

You may be stuck, but have to admit this isn't much of a healthy relationship at all!

Is not worth it. She is obviously not interested in you, and is out to have fun. Why try to change her, when all she is doing is doing what she wants with no regards as to what you want.

Also don't "research" anything, it doesn't do anyone any good, just leave, leave her alone, and make your life elsewhere.

Forget her and move on I have been so happy that I walked away from my ex, trust me no contact and do what makes you happy.

Thanks everyone, I have left her and the healing has begun, well at this point doesn't feel that way but I'm seeing the silver lining in all of this. Appreciate your opinions.

I wish you well! :)