View Full Version : I am being put-down and made to feel useless at work by a much older member of staff
mangomodel666
Jan 11, 2012, 03:31 PM
I work at a care home, and have only been employed there for 4 months. I try hard when I'm there to listen to what I'm told, and to remember things, and always feel I've tried my best at the end of every day. I get along well with everybody except one woman, she has worked in care for over 20 years and is very experienced in her job as a senior carer, but whenever I work with her she makes me feel so useless and rubbish about myself that I dread working shifts with her and dislike being there when I'm stuck working with her. She can be very blunt and cutting with how she speaks to me, and is often sarcastic, and makes me feel like an idiot in front of other staff, and I hate it. I try my hardest to do my best but it never seems enough for her. How do I deal with this situation?
ballengerb1
Jan 11, 2012, 03:36 PM
Many of us have had a similar person at work. You have few options. You can tell her how her actions make you feel by saying something along the lines of " I feel like you are trying to hurt my feelings when you talk to me this way" Comments starting with I rather than YOU will get you further. Another option is to be as bad as her and tell her off in front of others who she has also berated. Personally, I like the second option, it doesn't always work but you feel better for the moment
talaniman
Jan 11, 2012, 05:03 PM
Lol, brings back memories, and the best way of dealing with co workers who are difficult, is to do your job well, and if they have authority over you, to do it their way and let them take the heat. The key is to remember it's a job, and the challenge is to do a good job, despite the obstacles and challenges it presents.
Chances are others agree with you, and maybe she is lacking in social skills or graces, or is demanding, and giving you tough love. You never know what motivates others, hatred, or jealousy or fear of being replaced, or dismissed. But never take it personally and beat yourself up over their behavior.
Talk to her privately, let her know that she is getting on your last nerve, and ask why. If she responds, stay cool, and listen, and you gain insights you need to deal with this person. Maybe she is just a self absorbed arsehole, that has her life tied to the job, or maybe the job is all she has or knows. No telling though, but never let them see you sweat or be a punching bag to feed some ego.
Since you don't know, then make sure you know a lot about the person you are dealing with. Get the facts, act accordingly.
sunflower77
Jun 2, 2013, 11:17 AM
I think you must work at the same care home I do! I was just googleing this as I am in the same position I have been working in a care home for three months and 2 senior members of staff openly talk about how useless and slow I am just because I don't drag the residents out of bed and throw their clothes on the way they do I never get any praise for jobs well done they only focus on things I get wrong.I'm at the end of my teather and feel like leaving I'm so upset as I was really looking forward to working in care but I don't think there is any actuall care involved :(