I'm now 32, have been drinking since I was 12, last year I hit rock bottom, and was stabbed due to my poor behaviour, alcohol is ruling my life, I fear the outside world, and as soon as I wake, I have a glass of vodka, otherwise I could not leave my bed, I feel so lonely, during the day, as the drinking continues and at most consume half a litre of vodka a day, and have been told at days this could be up to the entire bottle.

I fight the drink and after moving have cut down, but once I get going there is no stopping, I have even tried watering my drinks, but this does not work.

I went to my doctor and have been referred, this not till the end of January 2012, I just don't wan't the life I have created, when I don't drink I get nose bleeds and are sick, and shake all over and are very cold. I suffer from severe blackouts, and it tears me daily.

Once I have a drink all the pain goes away, I have no more friends and my family hate me due to my aggressive behaviour caused by drink.

I feel I'm at the end of the road, I feel so depressed, I know the drink is a problem, but just can't seem to help myself, the pain is so great sometimes cutting my wrist helps ease, the pressure I feel inside.

Most of society has written me of, not understanding the curse and the hold that alcohol has on me, its no longer a pleasure, it's normal day to day life.

I cry, shout, yell but know one seems to here me, all my previous doctors just filled me with anti-depresants.

I'm not looking for sympathy, just advice from others, as I can't go to AA as I can't cope with lots of people round me.

I can feel my life slipping away and my memory is shot, the only way to explain is I feel a darkened cloud hanging over my life.

Martyn

Martyn,

It's very difficult to stop long-term chronic drinking without expert medical help. Sounds as though you have breakthrough withdrawal symptoms even when you cut back.

Antidepressants aren't going to do it. You will need a doctor experienced in alcohol withdrawal. May or may not require inpatient detox (know that is beyond reach of many) but will require a doctor that can make that assessment and manage detoxification if done on outpatient basis.

Do you have access to medical care? I note you mention having seen a doctor.

Are you located in US?

Hi DRBill,

I live in the uk, have used this site, because I'm not getting answers, I'm covered under the NHS, but getting into hospital detox is just as hard. I know this as tried, especially difficult with all the budget cuts.

Martyn

Martyn,

I know nothing about coverage under NHS so maybe you can help me with that.

I am aware that in the UK they make use of problem reduction strategies, more so than US. There should be available an outpatient program that would utilize medications to assist you in quitting or reducing your alcohol intake.

The problem you encounter when visiting an internist or general medical practitioner is a lack of knowledge of available remedies.

Do you know if it is possible to obtain referral to an addiction specialist through NHS?

Added: I see you were referred to some treatment. What type?

DRBhil,

Yes but it's a long waiting list, have to be assessed at the end of January, and, they take it from there.

I thank you for your comments, did not realise this was worldwide, am getting too weiry with drink so will reply any comments tomorrow, have poseted a note on my fridge, as won't remember.

Martyn

DRBhil,

Yes but its a long waiting list, have to be assessed at the end of january, and, they take it from there.

i thank you for your comments, did not realise this was worldwide, am getting too weiry with drink so will reply any comments tomorrow, have poseted a note on my fridge, as won't remember.

Martyn

Please get back tomorrow. We'll try to find some resources for you that might assist while you're waiting.

In the meantime I quickly found the following list of services available in the UK through NHS. Choices (http://www.nhs.uk/Livewell/alcohol/Pages/Alcoholsupport.aspx)

I'm fully aware that some of these may not meet your specific needs, or may be difficult to access. One way or another we can hopefully find something that will address your needs and begin to lift that dark cloud. Just stick with us.