View Full Version : Should I leave her.. Please someone help!
LetDown
Dec 19, 2011, 10:15 PM
Okay so I'm new here... But I really need some help.. I don't know if anyone will see this though... Thanks for anyone who does and leaves some advice, I really need it
Okay, so I am 16 and currently in a relationship. This is the first "serious" one I've been in (7 months so far) but I really love this girl... But I think she may like someone else... You see like a week after we got together she told me that she kept in contact with her exes. At first I really didn't mind because she said she loved me and that they already had their chance. But then school started a few months ago and she began talking more and more with her last ex.. She also talks about him or says something about him everyday now. I've told her that I didn't feel comfortable with her talking to him so much but she gets really mad about it and ends the conversation, even hanging up on me and if were on the phone and I ask..
One day at school she said that the guy "forced" her to kiss him. I don't really know if I believe that though because she's not the person to just take that, she said it was just on the cheek later though. She's also been talking to me a lot less on the phone too. Just the other day we were talking on the phone and I thought it was going good when she calls him and turns our conversation into a 3 way.. So I text her "why did you call him..?" and she hangs up on me and I ask her to answer and she says this "no you're going to ****ing cry" but yeah after awhile of begging she answered.. And I pretty much sat there all silent because she was just talking to him..
And after he left and I asked if she liked him and she was like I don't know and was deciding on whom to choose. She eventually chose me but kept talking to him a lot today.. She is the best I've ever had and I don't want to lose her.. I love her so much I really do, am I just being to jealous? I can be clingy.. I don't want the I'll get over it thing if I should break up with her.. I've never loved anyone as much as her and I really don't have a lot of friends, hence me being on here.
Thanks for any advice anyone can give, it means a lot!
anitatibbs1971
Dec 19, 2011, 11:10 PM
She may be the best, but you don't deserve that treatment. Btw I'm a 17 year old female. I'm on my moms account right now lol.. but do what I do. Break up with her, start talking to a girl any girl it doesn't matter. Ignore her phone calls for at least 2 or 3 days. IGNORE her period, but you HAVE to act HAPPY about what you have and are doing, or she's going to know your just doing it to get back at her. Finally, when you do talk to her if she hasn't learned to be nice, or if she doesn't want you back. Ask her how it feels to be "left out" "ignored" or just plain humiliated. She should be feeling guilty and actually talk to you now, not him. If not TRUST me, she is not worth it, there's plenty of fish in the sea besides a girl who is playing with your heart and mind. Hope I'm helpful, keep your head up! I'm your friend. :)
talaniman
Dec 20, 2011, 04:49 PM
She may be the best, but you don't deserve that treatment. Btw I'm a 17 year old female. I'm on my moms account right now lol.. but do what I do. Break up with her, start talking to a girl any girl it doesn't matter. Ignore her phone calls for at least 2 or 3 days. IGNORE her period, but you HAVE to act HAPPY about what you have and are doing, or she's going to know your just doing it to get back at her. Finally, when you do talk to her if she hasn't learned to be nice, or if she doesn't want you back. Ask her how it feels to be "left out" "ignored" or just plain humiliated. She should be feeling guilty and actually talk to you now, not him. If not TRUST me, she is not worth it, there's plenty of fish in the sea besides a girl who is playing with your heart and mind. Hope I'm helpful, keep your head up! I'm your friend. :)
I like your post and hope you can get your on acount to keep down confusion, and be an honest member of the forum. We would be glad to have you.
And after he left and I asked if she liked him and she was like I don't know and was deciding on whom to choose. She eventually chose me but kept talking to him a lot today
As soon as she disrespected you by calling him on a 3 way, you should have dumped her. As soon as she called him back you should have dumped her.
As soon as she told you she was trying to chose between you, you should have dumped her. Look I know this is your first, one and only, but when you are so desperate to keep someone that punks you out, that's not a real true healthy love. That's an addiction, and will rob you of dignity, and self respect, and humiliate the hell out of you.
You can do better guy, and have one that does respect you for who you are. Now that has to be more fun than someone that's playing you for a complete fool. When you allow bad behavior, you get more of it.
Man up, and stop being disrespected, as its better to be single than played a fool.
LetDown
Jan 5, 2012, 08:22 PM
Sorry if this is long.. I just need help and would really appreciate any advice.. I'm 16 by the way..
My girlfriend just dumped me yesterday.. but then asked me to forgive her and I did.. It was for someone else.. She's been talking to her ex a lot more (who she dumped me for.. ) even though she knows it upsets me.. Sometimes she would even merge calls with him while we were on the phone talking and I'm not very good with people and I know he likes her so I didn't say anything and she hung up and said she would call me later.. She lied about kissing him to make me jealous she told me?. I don't know if I was being too jealous and clingy.. I pretty much gave up all my friends to be with her, so yeah that's why I'm on here.. I'm at a loss of what to do..
She seems to not want to talk to me anymore and has started lying about doing something just so she doesn't have to talk to me.. Her ex cheated on her and is a complete jerk I don't get it.. She's said that she likes him but ended up choosing to be with me?. But when we are together it's the best times of my life.. And it's not like I spam her or anything.. If I leave I know I'll never find someone else.. I love her.. She was the best friend I've ever had and I love her so much... I can't stop crying.. She promised she would always be with me but yet it seems like she's only with me because she feels bad and wants to leave..
I'm sorry if I seem like a wimp.. I just want to give up and die.. I trusted her.. I would have done anything.. What's wrong with me?. What do I do..
Crazygurl123
Jan 5, 2012, 10:06 PM
Oh Hunny nothing is wrong with you. You definitely don't deserve what happening to you though.. Listen, I was in love once too. Thought he was my one and only and I truly believed in my heart that we would be together forever but he left me, came back, left me again. It just wasn't worth the heart ache anymore. I thought my life was over, I didn't know what to do. I lost a lot of friends because he didn't like them but when I needed them, they were there for me and I'm sure your friends will be too. I understand exactly how you feel, I've been there but I can promise you, there is someone out there for you. Someone who will treat you the way you deserve to be treated and will make you even happier than she did. I found someone who is perfect when I thought I would never be with someone again. Now I'm happier than ever. Besides you're still young and have a lot of time to fall in love :) you don't deserve what she puts you through, let her go back to her ex and watch her come crawling back to you when you have a new, better girl
LetDown
Jan 9, 2012, 06:50 PM
Sorry if this is long.. I just need help and would really appreciate any advice.. I'm 16 by the way..
My girlfriend just dumped me.. At first she said it was because she wants to be single but then she called and said it was her mom who made her.. I thought it was for her ex and I asked her and said yes.. She still is saying she loves me but then why is she with him?. She's my first love and I don't want to give her up.. She was talking to him before she did dump even though she knows it upsets me.. Sometimes she would even merge calls with him while we were on the phone talking and I'm not very good with people and I know he likes her so I didn't say anything and she hung up and said she would call me later.. She lied about kissing him to make me jealous she told me?. I don't know if I was being too jealous and clingy..
I pretty much gave up all my friends to be with her, so yeah that's why I'm on here.. I have no one to talk to at all and its making everything even worse.. I'm at a loss of what to do.. She seems to not want to talk to me anymore and has started lying about doing something just so she doesn't have to talk to me.. She then just now told me she only said she still liked me is because she didn't want to hear me cry because its annoying..
Her ex cheated on her and is a complete jerk I don't get it.. She's said that she likes him but ended up choosing to be with me?. But when we are together its amazing and the only time I'm really happy is when I am with her.. And it's not like I spam her or anything.. I know I'll never find someone else.. But she's beautiful with the best personality and I know she can.. I love her.. She was the best friend I've ever had and I just love her so much... I can't stop crying.. She promised she would always be with me.. I'm sorry if I seem like a wimp.. I just want to give up and die.. I trusted her.. I would have done anything.. What's wrong with me?.
I've never felt this bad before in my life.. I honestly want to die and make this all go away right now.. We have been together 1 year and 2 months.. I've been cutting myself for the first time in my life.. I just want help.. I don't know what to do..
Jackets67
Jan 9, 2012, 11:27 PM
First of all don't cut yourself anymore
Second of all don't you dare think of killing yourself over a high school love.
For starters in high school it's very common to break up, make up, break up, and so on trust me I'm a junior this year and I know this stuff from experience. I know your hurting right now but it will go away faster by you picking yourself up and moving on. Don't leave yourself available because she might come back, if she wants you back make her fight for it get a new girlfriend hopefully in the most a month or two. Trust me on one thing hurting yourself is not the answer I felt just like you did my freshman year I thought she was the love of my life nope she moved away and yeah I was sad and eventually I excepted I probably never see her again, then a few months later we got a new student and me and her just hit it off me and her have been dating for a little over two years now and she is the love of my life, but high school stuff always ends and if it's meant to be you will meet again outside high school. Again I mean my girlfriend the one I'm in love with is moving soon to Oklahoma 7hrs away and her dad hates me is that going to stop me no! What I'm trying to say is if you get hung up on her for your life you will be missing out on what could become an even better relationship then the one you had with her. Hope I helped buddy just stay strong.
LetDown
Jan 21, 2012, 06:38 PM
So a few weeks ago I found out that my girlfriend cheated on me for the second time with the same guy (her ex).. When I found out I was really hurt and yeah called and told her and at first she lied and said she wasn't going out with him too but eventually admitted it and let me go.. I'm 16 and so is she, we were together for one year and a month.. This was my first "serious" relationship that I thought we could really last forever I guess.. I mean we had been best friends for years before this.. she's still acting like were together?. Like we still talk and hang out every day and just today she kissed me again but when I asked her out she said she was taken.. I don't get it because even after we broke up she kept saying she loves me.. I haven't felt this bad in my entire life and I don't know what to do.. I love her so much and I've cried every night so far and have been skipping school just to stay home.. I cut myself last night and it felt good.. I just want help.. Should I just leave.. I don't know if I can because we've spent pretty much every day for a year together and talked almost everyday before that.. It's been like the best year of my life and I would have really died for her.. Why is she throwing it all away and then still spending everyday with me?. I think she is the most beautiful girl in the world.. It's not like she wants to be just friends either because she's the one saying she loves me and kissing me.. I feel used?. I don't know..