View Full Version : Why am I attracted to other guys when I am in a happy relationship?
robecca
Dec 16, 2011, 09:51 PM
I have been with my partner for two years and am only 25. Last night I got drunk at a work party and nearly cheated on him. I put a stop to it, but not straight away, and I ended up kissing the guy back who kissed me first, for a few seconds (I then pulled away in shock). The thing was on some level, I really did want it to happen. I just don't understand why though; I am very happily in love, but lately I have been noticing that I feel attraction towards other men. I have been letting myself get into flirtatious banter with guys I think are 'safe' i.e. they have partners too, but as a result I have gotten myself into a few sticky situations I really shouldn't have been it. Is it really this hard to have a monogamous relationship with someone you love?
vannabannabear
Dec 16, 2011, 10:03 PM
You've been with the same person for 2 years, maybe your just looking for something new. You could be tired/bored with your relationship now. But, if you are happy, and in Love, I think you should just be cautious around Those guys your attracted to.
talaniman
Dec 17, 2011, 11:17 AM
Its not hard at all to be monogamous, just set some boundaries of good behavior, and stay within them. While its human, and normal to FEEL attractions for others, you don't have to ACT on them, and getting drunk is never an excuse because you have a choice as to be drunk, or NOT!
Draw a line, and don't cross it, and don't get drunk and be in bad situations.
Need help with getting drunk, get it, but don't use it for an excuse. Same with flirting, stop, and stay within YOUR boundaries and you will stay out of bad, sticky situations.
jdeey
Dec 27, 2011, 12:25 AM
I too have a boy friend of 2 years. I love him so much but only a couple of months ago I found myself being very attracted to other guys. For a few weeks, every Saturday night I would have a dream I cheated on my boyfriend. I told ny boyfriend about the dreams and he told me 'maybe they are happening because you want them to'. I was kind of offended by what he said but realised he was right. I came to the conclusion that I was having these dreams and feelings because I was some what bored by staying with one guy for so long. I wanted excitement. And even though I loved my boyfriend so much I guess I just wanted to explore. It was just a phase. The dreams went away and my boyfriend and I are still together and very happy. Of course I still look at other guys from time to time in admiration of their good looks... but I don't take it any further than that. It becomes easier as you go along.
su2311
Nov 1, 2012, 09:59 AM
This is not true I'm in a relatioship too and I feel guilty too when I'm attracted to other guys, but its humam nature and I think its better to get over the attraction behalf of ignoring it, if you wait for a week or so you lose the attraction gradually and everything turns out to be normal, and she had dreams like she broke up , bt you didn't so my suggestion is try to gan more interest in your boyfriend and tel him what you did, if he still accepts you den I think dats what v call true love!