I have been with my fiancŽ for about a year and 6 months (most of which was long distance)
There were always things that I found fishy about her past, and I would ask her to be honest and tell me but she never would, she was saying that it was all just in my head and that everything was fine. For example, I thought she was a virgin and only till today did I find out she isn't.. That she actually lost her virginity to her xboyfriend a few months before we met. I lost my virginity to her, and I was saving it for the right one, so obviously this sucks. She has cheated on many of her past x boyfriends and has told me that she thinks it is wrong and would never do anything like that to me (or that she ever has in the past). She has told me about how her parents have been abusive in her past, and that she had scars to prove it (now to find self inflicted and her parents are not at all abusive). This is just a small list of things I am now finding out. Yet, for every story she has told me there has been some truth. And you all must think I'm crazy, but yeah I do still love her and I am going to get her to confess to everything and hopefully she can see that id rather her be honest than keep things from me. I haven't kept anything from her and have always been completely honest. I do still plan on being with her so long as she can just tell me the truth about everything and tell me she is sorry (and takes some classes about lying). Am I wrong for doing this? I know it sounds bad and I honestly know how bad it is. But if she had just told me the truth about these things in the first place they wouldn't have been problems, so as long as she can come forward and tell me and understand what she did wrong, that we can still be okay together? Or am I just too forgiving?

NOPE, you are going to MAKE her confess, sorry, actually so far what she has done is not really that bad and actually none of your business, and that is what she should have said,

You either trust her and love her and let it go, or leave her, since once you start putting demands on her to tell you everything, she should just leave you.

You have no "RIGHT" to know anything about before you became a couple.

1. almost all younger dating couples lie about having sex with someone before, If I had a dollar for every man who swears he was the first, or women who said of course you are the first, I would be a rich man. She told you what you wanted to hear. If she had had 10 guys before, guess what, you start new with her in a new relationship. So get over it.

People who self cut lie a lot, what I would be more concerned about is not her lying to you. But does she still do it.
Of course until she got to know you better she would lie, most people who self cut never admit it.
Welcome to the world of love, no it is not always right, it is not always fair, and if you want to make this worst, lose the attitude and approach this with love. She is already opening up, and going in with demands will just chase her away.

I would be concerned. She lies about evrything now and trust is a must when it comes to a relationship. I agree that you should worry about whether or not she is still cutting. She may need to see a counselor to deal with whatever it is that has led to this. Also if she has cheated on others there is no garrentee she won't cheat on you. Love is worth taking risk but you also have to know when it is unhealthy and time to walk away.

The thing is, she still hasn't told me anything. Not only that, she doesn't even know that I know. I am talking to her family, friends, and past x boyfriends and finding out that literally every part about her has been a lie. I know her past is none of my business, but if she is so persistent on telling me about it, why lie? If she had told me everything she did as the truth I'd love her the same (even more knowing that she is telling the truth). Not only that, but I found out she was still kissing on the guy she lost her virginity to while she was with me (and told me that he was forcing kisses on her and that he tried to rape her). I understand that I didn't have a right to know about her past, but she decided to tell me, and make it all up. I am still going to approach this with love, because I do honestly still love her with all my heart. I just want her to understand how much I care and that there is no reason to live a life of lies

I suggest you have pre-marrage counseling to help you both deal with these issues before you get married. You have a right as her future husband to confront her about this problem. If you don't do it now it will only leed to problems later. If she won't talk to u then suggest the couples counseling and just be honest about your love and concern for your future together. If she refuses to try to open up and tell the truth or do the counseling, then it may be time to back away from the engagement. Maybe confronting her and then giving her time to think about what she could be throwing awaY, by continuing to not be honest with you, will help her to see that some changes need to be made.

Why are you snooping in her past going behind her back You have no right. Sounds pretty controlling.