jjtop
Nov 29, 2011, 01:16 PM
My boyfriend and I have been dating for 3 yrs and sex was always great. He moved to a different city now and we are doing the long distance relationship thing and don't get to see each other as often. At first this made our sex life more exciting because we didn't get to everyday. It's been almost 6 months now since he moved and here lately when I go to visit he doesn't seem so interested in sex, just me doing oral to him. No matter if it is oral or if he decides to have sex, he can't seem to come. He never had a problem with coming in fact when we went for so long without having sex before he wouldn't last more then a half hour. What could be the problem about why I can't get him to come anymore?
Xerxes12
Nov 30, 2011, 08:15 AM
I'm sorry to say it but it is time for "THE TALK" - there are so many reasons this might be happening. But sadly it is happening, so during your next visit in person, make the time to talk. It might be stress, from the job, the move, the change in your relationship. It might be he is not well (sometimes hypertension causes men to become impotent). It might be that he is engaged in another relationship and his mind is elsewhere. I don't want to make you feel bad but JJTOP, it's an issue and it's important to you. A long distance relationship is very hard and then when you add the complication of intimacy going down the wrong path, well it is hurtful. Hurtful to you and that isn't right. Also, he might be wanting to talk to you about it but may not know the words so by you opening the door, you could be saving your relationship.
Just do it, but make sure you carve out enough time. UNINTERRUPTED time, and ask these hard questions with all the love in your voice. You will create an environment of caring and "safety" - hopefully he will open and share what's going on.
Best Wishes, ~X
Fr_Chuck
Dec 6, 2011, 01:10 PM
It is also very possible that he is masterbating a lot ( a lot) and in doing so, often they get so used to the feel that they control it is hard to finish during regular sex.