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View Full Version : What if you're 51 and never acted like it and now everything is falling apart?


chris545
Nov 25, 2011, 09:18 PM
I have a 22 year old son, whom I tried making happy and believe I succeeded to his wants. When he was a baby, I went to school to become a legal secretary but lasted only one year then started working for an insurance company.

There was all kinds of help out there for my son. I took so many buses between trying to get him help, going to college and daycare, then home. Now I'm not doing anything to help him. I've tried but everything is a real struggle now. He works part-time at LOWE's pushing carts in a parking lot all day.

I was 43 when I first got married (married only once) and have a husband who works always, is a part-time DJ also, and a volunteer firemen and fixes everybody's car, moves my family when they move (my family is elderly). He also picks up my and my son's medications whenever needed. But he is very strict and becomes unusually quiet when he has a bad day.

I have worked practically all of life and worked for the insurance company for 18 years and recently told my boss I couldn't take it anymore and quit. The job was downsizing the building and now with another building is hiring full force. I had an opportunity to look for new opportunities with higher pay with the insurance company I worked with, but, due to severe arthritis and fibromyalgia and stress of the job, remained as customer service rep while all my other friends went for better jobs within the company we worked for.

I also am dealing with menopause and also have been on hydrocodone and lyrica since 2003. I have become very paranoid and take my purse with me wherever I go. If I go upstairs to my room, the purse does too, and the same with downstairs. I don't trust my husband sometimes. Sometimes I know it may be my fault for not trusting him and other times the way he acts, I tend to think I'm right.

I don't like when my mom or sister tease me. They are meticulous, and I used to be, but I'm not anymore, and this makes me feel shameful. My mom is a person that doesn't want to leave her apartment a lot, so I stopped asking her to come over, plus she'll judge me.

I have been trying to get jobs from online websites for other customer service jobs or insurance companies and not having any luck and feel like I'm ready to end it all. I went for one interview with an insurance company and didn't get the job. Don't know what else to do.

I have some bad thoughts sometime picturing ways of suicide but there is a 98.5 chance I would never do it, but then again I never thought I would quit my job and that happened. At work, we had monthly coaching sessions and everybody continuously talked how my job was trying to get rid of people. We dropped customer service reps from somewhere starting 150-200 reps then down to 65. Everybody was saying they want you to quit so they don't have to pay the unemployment benefits. So at the last two coaching sessions, the boss first gave verbal warning for raising my voice to abusive callers, second time was going to be written. The next time was going to be termination.

I have never been termed before so I just said I can't take it anymore and quit. Now I can't get a job and can't get unemployment. They denied me. Any advice would help, and I am so sorry I wrote a book. Thank you for listening.

Fr_Chuck
Nov 25, 2011, 09:25 PM
Why did you quit, so they were going to fire you, they were down sizing, you and about 10 million people right now in the same book. But that is too late now. So you go to social services and see what welfare you can get, food stamps, medical care and so on.

Next your son is 22, time for him to open his wings and fly on his own, he is no longer a child and you do not need to be doing anything for him,

Next I hope I never act like I was in my 50's, If I stop acting like I am in my 30's or 40s it is time to put me away
We are young at heart and need to stay that way.

And so sisters don't think the way you do. So you were in insurance companies, not sure what part, but how about working for smaller agents locally, a broker ?