Me and my boyfriend have been together for 7 years on and off. We broke up because we cheated and we called off our wedding. Now we are working towards be coming a couple again but the girl is pregnant. I don't know if I should still work things out with him knowing this.

I love him, and I'm trying to forgive him but I hate the girl because she does thing to be smart and hurt my feelings. I love my sons father, and I would still like to marry him one day, but I don't know if I should.

I think you better wait on that marriage thing to see how his other baby mama is going to affect your life.

Do you and your on-again, off-again boyfriend live together? How are you trying to work things out with him, if the relationship has been so rocky that there have been several splits over the years. I presume that before the last split when he got another woman pregnant, that there had been serious problems.

Was he already involved with someone else when he cheated with you, when you got pregnant? When you got pregnant, and had his baby, what made you think that the relationship would work- the baby?

You went on to cheat on him, and he went on to cheat on you. That alone has consequences that are added to the already rocky relationship. That he then got another woman pregnant, only adds to things, and the way I see it, all these problems have added up to a giant mountain, and I cannot see a way that things will suddenly work, unless you are both willing to do more than you have so far.

Couples counselling might be a start.

I don't understand why you see the woman he got pregnant, as an enemy. She is pregnant, going to have his baby, and they will have that childs' interests, or should have that child's interests, for a lifetime. Which means they will be, or remain connected.

He should be connected to this woman, because he will have a child with her, just as he should maintain a connection with you, because he also has a child with you.

Should you decide to try- again- to make your relationship with him work, you have to accept that she will be in your lives because of his child. Visitation, child support, etc. These two children will be step-children, and share a relationship with each other as well.

Her, her baby, her family, etc. are all now included in your circle, with you, your baby, your family. And in the centre of all of this is your boyfriend, who made it all happen.

I think you are jumping the gun to even consider marriage, until you consider, and think about, all of the history, and what the near future will include when another baby is brought into this world. You won't have time to work on relationship problems while he is (hopefully) stepping up to be a father, paying support, to both of his children. You "hating" this girl because she "hurts your feelings", is secondary to the lives of these children.

She too, is going to be a mother, and involved with a man, who is involved with you, who already has a baby. Her life has suddenly become as complicated as yours.

I just hope this all works out and he is able to take responsibility for the children he has created. Right now, to me, on the outside looking in, the huge problems that existed even before children came into the picture, are only made worse for the present, and the future, as far as the two of you facing it together.

ERROR: You must spread some Reputation around before giving it to Jake2008 again.


I think you are jumping the gun to even consider marriage, until you consider, and think about, all of the history, and what the near future will include when another baby is brought into this world. You won't have time to work on relationship problems while he is (hopefully) stepping up to be a father, paying support, to both of his children. You "hating" this girl because she "hurts your feelings", is secondary to the lives of these children.

She too, is going to be a mother, and involved with a man, who is involved with you, who already has a baby. Her life has suddenly become as complicated as yours.

I just hope this all works out and he is able to take responsibility for the children he has created. Right now, to me, on the outside looking in, the huge problems that existed even before children came into the picture, are only made worse for the present, and the future, as far as the two of you facing it together.

This will take years to figure out, longer without the proper guidance.

When me and him got together we were not cheating with me and we work fine.. I was not because I had the baby that I thought things would work... but think you any way