View Full Version : Why I couldn't keep my boyfriend?
gissoo
Nov 15, 2011, 09:34 AM
I was dating about 8 months. He was in love and he wanted to move with me so fast. He also wanted to marry me . He has 4 kids but I have none. Recently I found out that he hided me from some girls in Facebook and he is texting his ex more than before (cause they have a kid together, so I could understand sometimes they might say something about their kid).
He said I was the greatest and kindest person in his life . He always said how hot and sexy I was . But recently He didn't call me like before and he didn't want to come to see me :( and all I did being nice and kind to him and his kids and help him. I really don't know what was wrong. Sometimes I feel like being good is not working. I never hided him from anybody , or do anything bad. I was loyal and honest and I feel like I didn't deserve that. He broke up with me last week. He said his feeling changed and he doesn't love me like before . But why? What did I do wrong? I want to know
JudyKayTee
Nov 15, 2011, 10:13 AM
The only person who knows why his feelings changed, why he doesn't love you anymore, what you did wrong (if you did anything wrong) is him.
It sounds like you've caught him in lies before. Maybe he's just a drifter when it comes to women.
Ask him. We would all be guessing.
gissoo
Nov 15, 2011, 10:40 AM
Thank you judykaytee. I can't call him I feel so bad. He told me that he felt he was cheating and he felt guilty :(
JudyKayTee
Nov 15, 2011, 10:51 AM
Well, maybe his guilt finally caught up with him.
You only broke up last week - how are you feeling about the breakup? Sometimes shock takes over and then the pain of a breakup starts.
gissoo
Nov 15, 2011, 11:03 AM
Thank you so much. JudyKayTee
I feel so bad and shocked. I am really honest and loyal person. I thought we were going to marry that's why I did everything. I introduce him to my family (it means a lot . My mom was so happy that I was going to marry) he was running after me all the time. So I felt he was the one. I tried to understand him when he had problems with his kids. His kids love me, they can feel if you really love them or you lie. I don't have kid and I was happy to have family by my own.
I cry a lot... I feel stupid , after all I did it was not right :( I should not have trusted him. But how you can love a man without trust? Without believing him? What's wrong to be a good. He always told me that I was the greatest person he met. So being hot - sexy - smart - great - loyal - honest is not enough so what else??
JudyKayTee
Nov 15, 2011, 11:47 AM
It's not you - it's him! Trust me.
Breakups are just so painful and difficult, even when you KNOW that the relationship is toxic or dishonest.
I wouldn't feel stupid - everyone gets involved with the wrong person at some point in his/her life. He may have done you a favor by ending the relationship.
And if it's meant to be, it will be. If he isn't the right person you have to believe someone else WILL be the right person.
Keep on being honest and sincere and wait for someone who will appreciate those qualities in you.
Kristen00
Nov 16, 2011, 11:56 AM
It doesn't sound like you did anything. Sometimes men... and everyone for the matter... just don't know what they want. When you start dating someone new, it can sometimes be really easy to get caught up in the rush of all the new and exciting emotions. You likely ARE all those things he said you are... smart, beautiful, etc... he just got spoiled by them and started taking them for granted. You will be all right! Give yourself time to heal and eventually you will find someone who is a real man and knows what he really wants!
gissoo
Nov 22, 2011, 03:13 PM
My boyfriend broke up with me about 20 days ago. I feel so sad and I try not to think about him but I can't help it. I just kept telling myself that I did nothing wrong. I guess he found somebody new in face book :( I know its better this kind of man go from your life, but I kept thinking how he fooled me and made me love him and when he got sure , he became jerk and became mean to me with no reasons. What should I do to forget him and be in peace? I feel like I don't want to trust anybody any more. I feel a big wound in my heart . I go to bed crying and I wake up crying... Its so sad :(
DoulaLC
Nov 22, 2011, 03:45 PM
You have to allow yourself time to heal. It doesn't happen quickly. You will start to have more good days than bad days.
In the meantime, spend time with your friends and family. Focus on work. Maybe get involved in something new. Little by little it will get easier and, at some point, you will be ready to meet someone new.
Again, this had nothing to do with you. He obviously wasn't ready to be in a serious relationship as he might have thought. Unfortunately, he didn't realize that until you had already had deep feelings for him.
It is sad, it is painful, but it will get better. Right now you just have to go through the hard bit to get to the better part.
gissoo
Nov 22, 2011, 08:33 PM
Thank you ,DoulaLC