Married to my wife and she has a son born with no birth father so I am his step father. How do I make him my real son?

When you get a divorce they will make you pay child supports for him either way. That's how it goes.

He has a biological father somewhere. Has any effort been made to find him?

married to my wife and she has a son born with no birth father so i am his step father. how do i make him my real son?


He has a birth father, of course - what you mean is no NAMED birth father. There's a difference.

Does she know who the natural father is? Has there been any DNA testing? Were you married to her when the child was born.

And, of course, what State - ?

You would (in general) apply to adopt the child. The Court will lead you from there.

She will need to find and notify the birth father and get his permission for the adoption

He may have no LISTED birth father, but he had to have a birth father, unless it was an anonymous sperm bank donor.

I highly recommend having an attorney prepare the adoption petition. The attorney can then help you deal with the bio father issue. As noted, an attempt will have to be made to identify him and get his permission to allow the adoption. If the father can't be found, the attorney will detail what efforts you have to make to show the court you tried to locate him.

By the way, it sounds like you are already his "real" father. What you need is just to make it legal.

I notice the NY in OP's name - here is an excellent and upbeat NY site about adoption. Adopt a New York Waiting Child - New York State Adoption Service - NYS Office of Children and Family Services (http://www.ocfs.state.ny.us/adopt/newbroch.asp)

What we really need to know was when the child was born? Was it before or after you got married ?