JulietteClo
Nov 2, 2011, 08:17 AM
Hello,
I have been dating my boyfriend for almost 6 years, we have lived together for 3 years. There is an age gap of 15 years, he is 39 and I am 24. We have always had our ups downs over various things e.g, whether it be jealousy from my side, commitment issues from his etc the usual stuff. We had in the end met each other half way and were as happy as we could be in the relationship, whilst we still argue on occasion like any couple and I know he has his own issues and frustrations with me I have one main issue about him that I need advice on. Whilst 95% of the time we are the best of friends, he treats me like a queen, is considerate, thoughtful, sensitive and helpful there is a 5% that I'm really struggling to be patient about. He talks to me so disrespectfully when he's frustrated or angry, I know that we all talk to people more harshly when we're annoyed than when we're calm and happy but it's more than that, we could just be having a disagreement and he loses his temper very quickly and swears at me,raises his voice or on far too many occasions has called me a c**t. We had a discussion last night about an issue that has been talked and mulled over for almost all the time we've been together about something that initially I was and should rightly have been annoyed/upset about but instead he got frustrated at me for feeling the way I did and told me that if I didn't stop talking about it he was going to tell me to f**k off out the house. (It's his house). We were not arguing before this but he still so easily tells me to leave or swears at me. I am confused mainly as this has happened a lot and whilst I believe he loves me I don't believe he respects me,would you agree? We went through a bad patch in our relationship for 12-18 months just gone and whilst I was ready to walk away and end it without trying he fought tooth and nail to keep the relationship, it's things like that which confuse about his feelings! I'll be the first to admit I have made a lot of excuses for him in the past due to the horrendous childhood he suffered but I've told him SO many times that I will not stand for this attitude forever, whilst I have forgiven it so many times already. Can I get your advice/opinions please? Thank you
I have been dating my boyfriend for almost 6 years, we have lived together for 3 years. There is an age gap of 15 years, he is 39 and I am 24. We have always had our ups downs over various things e.g, whether it be jealousy from my side, commitment issues from his etc the usual stuff. We had in the end met each other half way and were as happy as we could be in the relationship, whilst we still argue on occasion like any couple and I know he has his own issues and frustrations with me I have one main issue about him that I need advice on. Whilst 95% of the time we are the best of friends, he treats me like a queen, is considerate, thoughtful, sensitive and helpful there is a 5% that I'm really struggling to be patient about. He talks to me so disrespectfully when he's frustrated or angry, I know that we all talk to people more harshly when we're annoyed than when we're calm and happy but it's more than that, we could just be having a disagreement and he loses his temper very quickly and swears at me,raises his voice or on far too many occasions has called me a c**t. We had a discussion last night about an issue that has been talked and mulled over for almost all the time we've been together about something that initially I was and should rightly have been annoyed/upset about but instead he got frustrated at me for feeling the way I did and told me that if I didn't stop talking about it he was going to tell me to f**k off out the house. (It's his house). We were not arguing before this but he still so easily tells me to leave or swears at me. I am confused mainly as this has happened a lot and whilst I believe he loves me I don't believe he respects me,would you agree? We went through a bad patch in our relationship for 12-18 months just gone and whilst I was ready to walk away and end it without trying he fought tooth and nail to keep the relationship, it's things like that which confuse about his feelings! I'll be the first to admit I have made a lot of excuses for him in the past due to the horrendous childhood he suffered but I've told him SO many times that I will not stand for this attitude forever, whilst I have forgiven it so many times already. Can I get your advice/opinions please? Thank you