I am a young mother who has a daughter. I got pregnant at 15, and it messed up my life. He created a lot of problems for me mentally because I was so young. The man was 19 and knew what he was doing the whole time and just took advantage of me. I know it is my fault too, but I was 14. What I did was think, "This guy is cute!" and that was all it took.

He ended up cheating on me the whole time without my knowing and left after I had my baby. I met a guy from school who is amazing. He was great but has a temper. He is very rude and doesn't know how to talk to me when we fight. I'm not perfect either, but I try to just ignore him when we fight or just tell him to shut up. He won't stop telling me stuff and puts me down all the time, making me feel like I am the dumbest person ever!

He tells me I'm messed up in the head and all this stuff! I'm so tired that I can't even explain anything to him because he twists everything to where it makes me feel like I'm doing wrong and it's not his fault. I can't say anything because I can't explain myself! He always tells me I'm dumb and shouldn't even argue and all this.

But I don't know what to do. We had broken up because of how he treated me. It was for about two weeks. I had been working and had already met a guy, but I just didn't talk to him because of my boyfriend. Finally, we started talking, and I was so happy with him, but then again, it was only like a week or two that we talked. He liked me just as much and he was so nice to my baby -- carried him everywhere and did everything for me and was happy with me.

A little after that, my ex came to my house wanting to see my baby and wanting to fix things. This guy has been with my baby since he was 6 months and is like a dad to him. He thinks he deserves to see him because of that and considers him as his dad. I love him but I'm always thinking about the guy from work. I had eventually talked to him about it. He told me he'd be there for me with whomever I picked. I'm not sure what to do with him, though. I liked the guy from work but if I'm just having a crush on him or something because I don't want to do anything wrong because I have a kid to think about... I want to make the right decision.

Please help me and please understand that I really am having a hard time. Please tell me what you think honestly!

I think you need to talk to an adult, perhaps a professional, in detail about your situation. You are picking men who are not good for you and very probably not good for your baby. It's not just you any more. Now it's two of you.

Do not get into a serious relationship with one man when another man is "heavy" on your mind.

I think you have self esteem problems and need to learn about yourself before you make any life-altering decisions.

Yes I really think I do and its not that I don't get compliments I get a lot stares and guys always try to talk to me and compliments all the time and told I should be a model but I just don't feel like that and I'm not sure where I could look for help

I'm sure you know it's not all about being physically attractive to guys. It's about being comfortable in your own skin, providing for your child, making good choices.

Some suggestions might be a trusted relative, a clergyperson (not the best idea), your family doctor giving a recommendation of who you can talk to, perhaps someone in a "single parent" support group.

You are remarkably responsible and clear eyed - I NEVER see anyone admit on AMHD that they got pregnant too young for the wrong reasons - and obviously want to make good choices.

Are you in school? Do they have counsellors?

I actually graduated a year in a half early and was valedictorian I know I'm smart and can do a lot of good things for my daughter I've had a good clean life when I was little so I'm doing the same for her. I am currently working for an attorney as a legal secretary and I just turned 18 so I know I'm doing good for her but I just do not want me daughter to be involved in my current relatiohsuo because it's hurting me to know if things don't work out my daughter will suffer too

Are you in the U.S. blah?

Yes lol

Those are EXACTLY the reasons you need to speak to a third party to get your feelings sorted out. I once upon a time dated someone, thought he was great, had a few reservations - and then I introduced him to my family and they disliked him (to say the least). They were unbiased and didn't care if he was good looking and a great dancer - or anything along those lines.

My vision sure cleared up in a hurry. They were right. I just couldn't see it.

So - I would talk to a third party.

I agree with Judy -- it's time to run all this past someone who can help you feel better about yourself, so that you make good choices for both yourself and your daughter.

Do you need help in finding that unbiased person?

Wondergirl is a great source for resources - a play on words, not my finest.

She can assist you in finding someone in your area.

How do you like working for an Attorney? I always found the work to be really, really interesting.