My kids go to a school where I am an active volunteer. I discovered, when balances were read at a public meeting, some money was missing from a fundraiser I was in charge of. (I wasn't in charge of the bank account, just the fundraising. The checks collected came in the mail and were supposed to be deposited by the treasurer).

I raised my hand and commented that the total didn't sound correct to me, according to my own record-keeping. Treasurer said they would look into it. At the next meeting when I re-raised the question, the chairman said he had spoken to the Vice Principal of the school who said that I had asked for the checks to be written to a different account, and they'd been spent as part of that account, weren't in the fundraiser because of my error.

I was highly embarrassed and stopped asking, but I also felt I'd never done what they had said. Afterwards, I investigated enough to find out that the vice principal (not the treasurer) had taken about $1000 from the fundraiser and signed the deposit into another account and spent it. But I went to the people who'd written the checks and they confirmed they had written the checks to the correct account--my fundraiser. So the story about the change in the checks seems totally made up.

Now I was wondering why I'd been blamed for something I didn't do. I suspected because I'd caught somebody in power doing a no-no. Afterwards, when I tried to explain at the office what I had found out, they took my information, but I heard back from no one. A clique headed by a woman who didn't like me even before my kids went to school there started badmouthing me around town--I heard various lies about me reported to me in gossip, and I even lost a dear friendship over it like in a divorce where friends choose which spouse they will 'go' with--and there were vile comments made in our Internet volunteer chat room.

It would be another 2 months before there'd be a meeting to try to clear this up, so I tried to defend myself in the chat room, carefully explaining what I had uncovered about the checks--that I was innocent. And I was blocked from chatting anymore. This woman and her friends went on to call me a call me a female swear word, and one even said they needed to get matches for a witch hunt, that I was destroying the school and shouldn't show my face anymore. One woman said they needed to get out the big guns to shut me up. Amazingly, they didn't seem to think people could read what they'd posted.

Needless to say, I have drastically cut back my volunteering and didn't even attend the next meetings. Months later, I was minding my own business on a totally unrelated website forum and the woman who'd always hated me--she used her real name, as had I--signed up as a member and started posting a bunch of filth about me wherever I'd posted any comments, even going months back to top-post stuff. She got herself kicked off the site because she wasn't saying anything having to do with the forum and was posting personal information.

I filed a complaint at our school alleging bullying and intimidation since they consider volunteers there to be 'staff' and subject to the same bully policy as the kids are. I mentioned both that I had been retaliated against in a school volunteer meeting for asking about missing money and had been falsely accused. That smack was all over the school volunteer chat site about me--with lots of teachers and admin as witnesses who did nothing about it--and I'd been unfairly blocked and now was being stalked and harassed by this woman off campus.

They had a risk management company investigate. I just got the decision this week and they (do they seem a bit preferential to you?) decided none of it amounts to bullying or intimidation. I should mention that there is currently an investigation of the missing money going on, but the school is also saying there was nothing wrong with the VP taking the money. The chairman has now recanted his information that I was the one who had the checks written to the wrong account (I think only because he knew I could prove it).

So I'm asking here, do you think what happened to me falls under bullying and intimidation as I alleged, or am I seeing this the wrong way and it's nothing like the school says? Personally, I think they say it's not just to bully me some more and make me stop asking about this money and cut their liability... but that's just me...

Have you reported this to the school board,

Have you reported the mis-use of funds to the state board of education ?

Have you called the local news service and reported this to be investigated ?

Have you continued to stand up and demand an accounting at school meetings.

You sound like you just gave up? So it gets tough, did you tell everyone the truth, did you threaten the person telling lies that you will sue them if they continue with the lies ?


Did you report to the DA or police the misuse of funds, what was done is criminal also

Have you reported this to the school board?

**more or less yes. They were at the meeting where I was accused**

Have you reported the mis-use of funds to the state board of education ? **no. I did go to a thing that is supposed to be a superintendent of the state's schools above our superintendent. They took audit info and concluded the VP had done nothing wrong, ignored everything else I told them about the false accusations it was never even mentioned in their report**

Have you called the local news service and reported this to be investigated ? **yes, not interested**

Have you continued to stand up and demand an accounting at school meetings?

**I no longer attend meetings, fearful what will happen to me next to ostarcize/retaliate against me**

You sound like you just gave up? So it gets tough, did you tell everyone the truth,

**I can't tell everyone because they have silenced me in most channles that I'd use to tell. I am slowly being to have no friends, fear who might not be my friend, fear how badly this group against me is going to get. To me--am I seeing this wrong? --it seems like they all just want to protect the VP and so remain a unified force ignoring everything I give them as facts except that now--it's a year later--the chairman admits he had bad information and says I did not change the checks but my kids are in the school with this VP I kind of don't want to stir too much. I did write a blog about it but don't know who sees it. That was probably just my own mental therapy. I did talk to a lawyer who says unless I had financial loss from slander there's nothing to fight**

Did you threaten the person telling lies that you will sue them if they continue with the lies ?

**No didn't threaten to sue because lawyer said no financial loss to me. And there was a whole bunch--the school board included who believed the lies. There were even letters to the editor of the newspaper saying how awful that I had accused the VP of something and how great the school district is. I did ask for an investigation at that superintendent thing and the audit came and showed exactly what I said all along but that was months and months after it all happened and everybody tells me I'm a lunatic not to let it go after all this time. The only actions I've taken are contacting authorities to investigate and every one comes back and say there was nothing done wrong, so I'm starting to think I am really crazy and that I can't even tell anymore right from wrong. The school concluded there was nothing wrong done by the VP, just like now they concluded I was never bullied or intimidated. I protested they'd ignored much of what happened and they just said they consider the matter closed. The money has never been paid back to my fundraiser and I quit my fundraiser position. Getting no where on the money issue I took another direction and asked for the bullying to be investigated and put the facts of the money accusations into the official bullying report. Which now they came back and said I wasn't bullied or intimidated, so my question here is really does AMHD consider I was bullied and how can someone say you weren't intimidated when I obviously ought to know how I feel. But maybe I am wrong and crazy. How is 'bullying' decided legally if it happened or not. Frankly, I'm surprised they haven't filed a 'fake bullying report' charge against me.


Did you report to the DA or police the misuse of funds, what was done is criminal also

I'm going to try a shorter more direct question, if you want/need more background information, search out other question posted by me, please.

Simply put, at our local school I discovered missing money & I asked about it. The immediate response was that the tables were turned (publicly) and I was accused of having something to do with the money missing. (it was so believable I even thought I'd done it until I got paper trail that proved exact opposite--that those accusing me lied and had taken the money themselves.) I felt scared thinking what else could they accuse me of if I didn't back off?

But I did try to clear my name ONCE and attempted to publicize what I had found out, I did so in a manner of asking those reading the information to join me in asking more questions--now not only where's the money? But why was I accused of something I never did? Because these folks controlled the media I was using, I was immediately deleted and blocked from speaking in the public forum. I was then called on phone and called a bad name, called a liar, suggestions made that everyone is unanimous against me and I have no friends. In fact, I had a friendship severed based upon my friend being forced (not by me) to choose sides or face never being left alone re this subject. This 'side' is posting threats on-line suggesting a witch hunt, etc.

So I filed a report of bullying and intimidation. Investigator hired was a risk mgmt team for the other side. The decision rendered is what my question is about here on AMHD: They concluded there was no bullying and intimidation. Now, I'm trying to figure out who's crazy here, them or me? IS this a decision of fact or a decision of bias (solely to limit their liability), do you think?

Please continue your question on one thread. Looking up and going back and forth between two or more posts is time consuming and confusing.

Where did you file a report and what did you want to accomplish? It sounds more like slander and less like bullying to me.

I am confused by your statement: "it was so believable I even thought I'd done it until I got paper trail that proved exact opposite."

This goes against your own interest.

So you lose some friends, they were not friends anyway,

You keep telling the story till you have no one less to tell, You get on the school board agenda, and make it a direct issue to them, not they were there.

And in the end, what do you want to do or prove ? You want the other person to shut up? You want to school to investigate ?
Hire an attorney and threaten to sue each of them.

To be honest, I wouldn't really call this bullying. Slander, defamation, yes, bullying no.