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View Full Version : Bad communication


rebecca9260
Oct 25, 2011, 09:32 AM
I am 18 years old, and my boyfriend is 21. We have only been dating for about 2 months now, and he is my first boyfriend. When we first started dating, it was amazing. However, he was really bad at texting or calling me when we were not together. I was going to talk to him about it, but then he improved on his own.
But recently, he has been terrible with communicating with me. We are both really busy, so sometimes texting is our only option. He usually just gives me one word answers, or just doesn't respond at all. We just talked about how when we don't talk a lot it upsets me, and he was really understanding about it. But literally a few days later he goes back to what he always does. It seems like he is losing interest,or just doesn't care. I don't want to come off as the needy girlfriend, and talk to him again about it, but it really upsets me, and I do not know what to do.

Cat1864
Oct 25, 2011, 12:13 PM
Many people don't like communicating through texting. He could be one of those people. Have you asked him what the best way and time for him to communicate with you is?

Keep in mind that it is okay to go for a couple of days without talking especially if you are both busy. Usually, if someone tries to make demands (however nicely they may do it) when the other person is already tired, busy, or stressed out, the other person can react negatively to the pressure-curt answers, ignoring calls, forgetting to return messages, etc.

You both have needs. Part of being in a relationship is finding a compromise between them. Perhaps he doesn't like texting (does he have a texting plan on his phone?) and you do. If he finds it impersonal, find out what he does like. Maybe you text him occasionally and don't expect an answer immediately. He calls you when he isn't trying to do five things at once to set a time to see each other. Then he can give you the attention you deserve.

You don't have to be in constant contact. So you go a day or two without talking. It doesn't mean you are tired of each other or the relationship is ending. It just means you have to communicate and compromise to find works best for you as a couple.

I wish
Oct 25, 2011, 08:53 PM
I suggest that instead of trying to force a conversation, through text or another way, try to schedule some time for each other. When you're both busy, it's time to pull out your schedules to see if you can find some alone time together. When you're alone together, it will be easier to work on things, rather than trying to text on the fly.