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View Full Version : Is it OK that I'm 13 and in love?


love147
Oct 15, 2011, 11:11 AM
I'm 13 and I'm in total love with someone but he has a girl friend he says that he loves her but she's 2 years older than him and she's really sluty and she's just using him for sex she said it to me and he tells me he loves me and if she dumped him than he would date me but I'm nevious that he will try to have sex with me because she makes him feel like it is OK but it not I'm a person that wants more like a relationship relationship not a sexualy relationship I just need advice I don't have a dad with me and my mom thinks a boys want sex its not true some do but a lot don't and yeah... What should I do!

Cat1864
Oct 19, 2011, 08:40 PM
Love, it's okay to have feelings for another person, but that doesn't mean it is a good idea to act on them. In this case, I would leave this boy alone.

It doesn't really matter what their relationship is like. It is theirs and they are both wrong to involve you in it. Next time either one of them try to say anything to you, tell them to talk to each other and to leave you out of it.

This boy is trying to keep you around and waiting on him in case the other female drops him. That makes you his safety net (the net that circus performers use to keep them from hitting the ground if they fall.) Another term is 'back up plan'. That is not a position you want to be in because it means he is always on the look out for the next person he wants. He isn't thinking about the relationship he is in. You also don't want someone who would leave another person for you for the same reason.

I, personally, think that 13 is a bit young to think about love and dating one person. At 13, you should be learning how to meet people and make friends. You should be learning how to be social in a mixed group of people your age. It is also when you should be learning how to balance a social life with school, after-school activities, and home. It is a part of growing up that seems to be skipped over these days.

While not all males are looking for sex, your mom may be right about this one. It is better to keep some distance and be a friend if you can without emotions getting in the way. If you can't, then let him and his 'girlfriend' entertain each other. It may not seem like it right now, but you will meet many more males who will be better suited to being your friend than this one.

Don't rush trying to grow up. It will happen on its own before you know it. If possible, keep talking to your mother. She does have your best interests in mind and heart even if it may not seem that way to you at the moment. Good luck, love.

styrka_svaghet
Nov 4, 2011, 05:25 PM
Well don't tottally rely on my adice, I could be wrong, maybe what I say will sound right to you...
Well the word no is a powerful word
If he really loves you, he'll respect your limits
Does he know she's using him for sex
I know someone in kind of the same situtation
He's in love with a girl and says she's the one, she's a lesbian and is using him for sex and he kind of knows and still says she's the one, he pretty much says that with every girlfriend he has though, but there is no love triangle here.
Now I want you to think about everything, every detail and you put what's right with what because I was once told all the time by a guy he loved me and he had a girlfriend. I tried to run away from home and I stopped talking to him. He did nothing wrong it was just me I was going through crap but then he broke up with his girlfriend and I thought he was going to ask me out even though I hadn't talked with him that much. But you know what, he got a new girlfriend like a week later. I do not know what he is playing or if he's going through crap... I hurt a little every time I see his picture on Facebook. I don't trust many people either.
I was really shy with him but he kept hanging out with me and liking me. But I also felt like I was a affair because we would makeout when he had a girlfriend.