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snoop_Y
Oct 13, 2011, 07:04 AM
Salaams

I am a Muslim girl aged 22 and I have a very big problem regarding my parents and the issue of marriage, my father does not want me to get married and settle down because he is only worried about work and career and jobs, I have found a Muslim boy I would like to marry, he is from a good Muslim home and background and I am very happy because he is very Islamic ally inclined. When ever I talk about marriage to my parents especially my father he gets very angry and shouts me. I am so scared to talk to him about it now because I know how he is. I have tried and tried and I just find any other way of telling him. Can I still marry him as I feel its is the right way and I am happy with this decision I have made in my life. Please help me it would really mean a lot.

JazakaAllah

jenniepepsi
Oct 13, 2011, 11:26 AM
Assalamu alaikum

May I ask what country you reside in? Have you spoken to your father? Has the boy spoken to him?

I do not presume to speak for Allah. Insha Allah my words are correct. But I believe you would not wish to go against your fathers wishes unless there is no other alternitive.

I would suggest speaking to your Imam, get his advice. Perhaps ask the Imam to meet with you and your parents together, and discuss this.

snoop_Y
Oct 14, 2011, 01:15 AM
I reside in Harare, Zimbabwe. I have tried and I just got told to abandon any thoughts of marriage, I feel the right to marriage has been taken away from me. I have an elder sister aged 27 and is not married. I don't know what else or how else o convince my father that this is what I want in my life.

afaroo
Oct 14, 2011, 08:57 AM
Hello Snoop_y

Yep it is hard some time to convene the father.

Have you asked him, what is the reason?

Have you talked to your mom and sister?

Have you shared this issue with your relatives?

Does the boy have parents or relatives to talk to your father?

Is there any way that you can talk to your Imam that hewill talk to your Dad.

Try all of the above and see what happens, wish you all the best.

John

jenniepepsi
Oct 14, 2011, 01:19 PM
I do not know the cultural issues in zimbabwe. I hope someone who does will be able to answer.

But if your father is going against Islam, and Allahs wishes of marriage, it may be necessary to go against your fathers wishes to serve Allah. Allah comes first. Even if it means your parents will be disapointed.

But please, speak to your Imam before you make ANY decisions!!

Assalamu alaikum

snoop_Y
Oct 17, 2011, 05:52 AM
Asalaam

I have spoken to our Ulama in Zimbabwe and they said I should speak to my parents regarding this and if iy does not help I should tell them and they will sort it out, my father has a very very bad temper and it makes it hard for me to speak to him and he will not listen to anybody. I have spoken to my aunt but she thinks I should not get married, and I was told by my father that the boys parents should not step foot in our house, I really feel bad for him caz I don want him to die in this state, with a temper and not enough islamic knowledge, I really know that this is the boy I want to get married to but the reason my father is not agreeing is because of him surname, I feel that no matter what name the boy's family has if his born muslim that is all that should count.

JazakAllah

jenniepepsi
Oct 18, 2011, 06:08 PM
Salam

I wish you luck then! Insha'Allah you will find your way, safely! And please come back and let me know how it is going for you

Assalamu Alaikum

snoop_Y
Oct 18, 2011, 10:48 PM
Insha-Allah, Allah will make it easy for me... thank you so much for giving me this advice
May Allah Grant you lots of happiness in your life. Ameen