View Full Version : I'm 20 and my husband is 23. He doesn't want to sleep with me anymore.
hollow_wings
Feb 5, 2007, 10:30 AM
Well, let's see here. Before my husband and I were married, we had amazing sex. All the time. In fact, I couldn't keep him away from me, and it was great. Ever since we got married though, ONLY 2 MONTHS AGO, his desire to sleep with me seems to be... gone.
I'm only 20 and he's 23. This is his sexual prime, I don't understand what's wrong. He says everything is still "mindblowing" when we do it, and he says that I'm sexier now than ever before. I've even lost weight since we've been married instead of the usual "I got married and got fat" syndrome. I've tried talking to him, I've tried spicing things up, but really, I'm sick of always having to initiate everything.
I feel unwanted and hideous, and I don't know what else to do.
Help?
Stac33
Feb 5, 2007, 11:15 AM
Does your husband EVER initiate it? How often do you have sex? Is he maybe stressed from work or something? It seems that you two have an open line of communication though. That's key here. I totally understand that you feel unwanted and hideous. That is the woman in you. Men tend to not feel that way so much. When you do talk to him is he open? Does he feel as though something is wrong? Does he have an explanation?
laylow80
Feb 5, 2007, 12:06 PM
Maybe your husband felt before you were married, that he had to have sex with you to keep you around. And now that you two are married, he knows he has you, and doesn't feel the need to as much. But that's a weird attitude towards things, I'd think that once married, you would have sex more often.
Try talking to him about this, see what is on his mind. Maybe there is something else on his mind that is distracting him from your sexual life. Not another woman or anything, maybe there is just a chance he is depressed over something. Communication is the key to any good marriage/relationship, so talk to him. Hope this helps.
kp2171
Feb 5, 2007, 12:27 PM
Even a good marriage can have stresses... and contrary to popular belief, sometimes the honeymoon period is the most stressful. My wife and I had more stress and fights in that first year or so than we have had in the rest of our now 7 year marriage.
Stress can be an absolute killer for the libido. Is he sleeping well? Working more? Working out? Stressed about money, etc?
I think its normal to go through cycles of wanting sex more sometimes and less others.
Long term, its not good for your relationship. Short term, it might just be a temporary downturn.
NiHi
Feb 11, 2007, 05:06 PM
Well, let's see here. Before my husband and I were married, we had amazing sex. All the time. In fact, I couldn't keep him away from me, and it was great. Ever since we got married though, ONLY 2 MONTHS AGO, his desire to sleep with me seems to be... gone.
I'm only 20 and he's 23. This is his sexual prime, I don't understand what's wrong. He says everything is still "mindblowing" when we do it, and he says that I'm sexier now than ever before. I've even lost weight since we've been married instead of the usual "I got married and got fat" syndrome. I've tried talking to him, I've tried spicing things up, but really, I'm sick of always having to initiate everything.
I feel unwanted and hideous, and I don't know what else to do.
Help?!
May be he has problems with erection? Extagen helps a lot. May be he has stressful job... Or other problems...
TheSavage
Feb 11, 2007, 05:12 PM
By chance now that your married are you wanting a baby and he is not? [Just a random thought]
Want2Know
Feb 11, 2007, 08:15 PM
You may be creating your own problem. Maybe you are expecting too much of yourself and him. Let it happen naturally.
chevybaby24
Jun 4, 2011, 07:49 PM
I don't have an answer to your question but I am going through kind of the same thing with my boyfriend, we've been together for years and ever since I got pregnant he hasn't wanted me much anymore I don't know if it has to do with the baby or if that's just coincidence or what is going on but I got pregnant and he stopped wanting and said it was because he didn't want to hurt the baby and I had the baby in dec and he is still acting the same way I have to beg for it and its getting irritating, if you find out what's bothering your man please give me some insight
CravenMorhead
Jun 4, 2011, 11:23 PM
Chevy Baby, This thread is four years old. Nothing will be gained by resurrecting and hijacking this thread. If something is this old, let it sleep and start a new thread with your question. As you've already done.
As well all this is relatively unique to the person. The problem and the solution in this case might not be the same for you as it was for them.