View Full Version : Party Etiquette
titanic2011
Oct 11, 2011, 05:03 AM
Here's a scenario. New relationship, take her to a party to meet close family friends. She meets some other random and spends time talking to that person. Wouldn't you have expected her to get to know the closer family friends as opposed to some random guy?
I guess it kind of bothers me because originally she wasn't going to come to the party and we got into a huge argument about it. Then I bring her to it and eh.. I'm not sure if it's worth bringing up.
DaniCalifornia
Oct 11, 2011, 05:41 AM
I understand why you're feeling that way, but it might just be that she was nervous.
Meeting family can be very daunting, and it may just be that she found someone there that she had things in common with and felt comfortable to chat to. After all, she knows hardly anyone in the room!
X Dani
Cat1864
Oct 11, 2011, 06:07 AM
How long have you been dating her now?
Why didn't she want to go to this 'party' and why did she finally agree to go? Where was this 'party'?
If you all but forced her to go to this party when she didn't want to, did you really expect her to be open to meeting close family friends? Why were you so set on her going this early in your relationship (by your posts on this site, you have only been dating maybe two months?)
Some people are uncomfortable meeting family and friends of their boy/girlfriends in social settings such as parties. Some are okay with an initial meeting but more than that feels like they are being forced into a more personal relationship than they are ready for.
How did you behave at this party? Did you introduce her to people and make certain she had common interests to discuss with them other than you? Did you stay with her and try to be certain she was included in conversations with people she doesn't know from a hole in the ground? Did you go off on your own and leave her to find her own way around the gathering? When you saw she was apart from the groups you thought she should be interested in, did you ask her if she was doing okay and having fun?
At least she wasn't yelling at you to take her home the entire time. Talk to her and find out why she didn't seem comfortable around your close family friends. Listen to her. Be open minded about her needs. See if the two of you can figure out a better way to introduce each other to people who are close to you.
Remember that it does take some people longer than others to be ready to meet close friends and family. Don't try to force something just because you think it should go at your pace instead of one that is mutually agreed upon.
titanic2011
Oct 11, 2011, 10:48 AM
Few months dating. This happened a few weeks ago. I brought it up now on here because I have been thinking about it. Just trying to understand if I need to stop looking into things and stop being an idiot, or if I should really make note of it.
She was wanting to go to the party. She is ALL about meeting close friends. I stayed with her quite a bit while we were at the party, but not just me, but around people I wanted her to get to know, introduced her to people I knew and actually wanted her to know, including the few people we went to the party with, who she was introduced to prior and hung out with that same night for some time before we went out. She enjoyed herself.
But there was this one guy who clearly I did not know, nor was she introduced to, and he was there earlier in the night and she was chatting with him a bit, then when we got to the party the same thing later on there. Just them 2, clearly where everyone can see, and if I was a random the way she was acting movements looked like flirtation. She even told me that she was an attention freak.
I guess if it was me in this situation, I would have made a bigger effort to meet the people that she would have introduced me to, and not some random friend of a friend of a friend. Like people she knew that meant something to me and who she HAS hung out with before. Given how serious the argument had gotten earlier that day.
I'm not really bothered by it, but if it happens again then I will question it. Seeing how we will be doing a similar thing in a few weeks.